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News & Current Events Apr 1, 2026 at 7:31 PM

'America Deserves Better': Top Trump FEMA Official Continues to Claim He's Being Teleported By God

Posted by _May26_

'America Deserves Better': Top Trump FEMA Official Continues to Claim He's Being Teleported By God | Common Dreams
Common Dreams
'America Deserves Better': Top Trump FEMA Official Continues to Claim He's Being Teleported By God | Common Dreams
​"With over 340 million people in this country, you’d think we could find people grounded in reality to run our government programs," said Sen. Mazie Hirono.
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JFJinCO Apr 1, 2026 +1
Lay off the ketamine, dude.
1
Training-Republic301 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Or benzos. They also do that
1
Rare_Paper4473 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Somehow Americans still think they're not the same as Iran yet.
1
simplepimple2025 Apr 1, 2026 +1
They're not. Iran deserves some respect.
1
thethrill_707 Apr 1, 2026 +1
You want delusions about God and teleportation? Dollar Store Nyquil, that's how you get delusions about God and teleportation. My suggesting sir is that next time, you spring for the CVS brand.
1
Remarkable-Memory374 Apr 1, 2026 +1
St. daniels of jack
1
ThisOneFuqqs Apr 1, 2026 +1
Yeah happened to me once. I was out with the boys and God teleported me into a brothel. He also teleported my money out of my pocket and into the hooker's. He works in mysterious ways.
1
NPVT Apr 1, 2026 +1
I once was teleported to a jail.
1
ThisOneFuqqs Apr 1, 2026 +1
He was really testing you!
1
Simmery Apr 1, 2026 +1
God needs waffles!
1
StrangeDeal8059 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Does it though?
1
uniquechill Apr 1, 2026 +1
The stupidity of MAGA continues to impress me.
1
crazybones Apr 1, 2026 +1
In recent days I've actually found myself doing a lot of teleporting. With world events being so stressful, if I'm watching the news on television, I always have close to hand a big bottle of port.
1
Randomwhitelady2 Apr 1, 2026 +1
This administration is conmen and loons. Good lord
1
Iribumkiak Apr 1, 2026 +1
Teleported? I'll use that next time I get blackout drunk.
1
feralmoron Apr 1, 2026 +1
Dave Attell calls it “time travel”.
1
firethorne Apr 1, 2026 +1
Teleported... by God... to a Waffle House... There is no expletive that exists to accurately encapsulate my feelings towards this situation.
1
trash-juice Apr 1, 2026 +1
He doesnt want to do anything but pickup a check and this is an easy way to do that, whose gonna have any expectation of that?
1
Educational_Lie_3157 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Like Olive Garden teleports me to Italy.
1
NeoThorrus Apr 1, 2026 +1
Btw, this guy was giving the most important position in FEMA, the guy who literally has to make split-second decisions in how to manage an ongoing disaster. Yet the guy has never managed a diaper emergency from a baby.
1
isekai_cheese Apr 1, 2026 +1
i think he meant Thyme Traveller
1
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