I always thought it was funny that the military automatically rejected everyone who admits to using any drug including marijuana on a self-reported questionnaire.
With that method you aren't filtering out people who have used drugs, you're just filtering out people with too much integrity to lie about it.
2444
p4ttythep3rf3ctMar 25, 2026
+680
When I was at MEPS, like 2002, dude asked me what I wanted to do for the Army. I said I want to be a hacker. Youd think I had shot his dog. He stared at me with a disappointed look and said ‘thats illegal.’ I then aced the DLAB and chose Food Service Specialist instead. They arent too bright at the MEPS.
680
unforgiven97Mar 25, 2026
+298
Nope. Went to MEPS in 07 for the Navy, and the Army passed a guy with a 9 on the ASVAB. He qualified for waivers because he spoke Arabic as well as English. I cannot possibly imagine how you would get a 9.
298
stonertbonerMar 25, 2026
+169
Shit. I was surprised at how dumb the people that scored in the 30s were. Nine is something special.
169
8-bit-FelixMar 25, 2026
+134
I had to make two MEPS trips, one for processing and one for DLAB, and got stuck next to a guy who is the definition of yokel. Super nice guy but he talked super slow and in a drawl that made even my Southern ears confused.
Yokel: "I'm gonna take the Asz-Fab again."
Felix: "That's cool, I have to take the DLAB."
Yokel: "Took the Asz-Fab last week but didn't make it. Gonna be in the Navy."
Felix: "Yeah, some of the questions were tough."
Yokel: "I'm gonna get me that 13. I'm gonna work on the nu-clear submersible."
Felix: "..."
Yokel: "Gonna be a sailor."
Shortly after I left and when I got back he was gone from the waiting room.
To this day I wonder what the hell happened to him.
134
Interesting-Pin6652Mar 25, 2026
+144
Probably has a Medal of Honor and is currently training with the Olympic ping pong team.
144
r0botdevilMar 25, 2026
+39
I'm not being funny when I say this, sometimes I genuinely envy people who are that stupid.
His life must be so simple. Sounds like he had his plan all figured out: join the Navy, be a sailor. I doubt he's spent many nights lying awake in bed wondering if that's really the right path for him in life. Probably never even gave it a second thought.
39
8-bit-FelixMar 25, 2026
+18
Brother (or sister, et elia) I earnestly hope that man is having a great life doing whatever it is he's doing.
I just hope he's not on a nu-clear submersible.
18
laplongejrMar 25, 2026
+75
> and said ‘thats illegal.’
Geeez, I'm pretty sure acts of war are illegal when seen from the invaded country.
75
Low_Pickle_112Mar 25, 2026
+84
Is that a bug or a feature?
84
r0botdevilMar 25, 2026
+54
Honestly that's probably not a bad question.
54
eastbay77Mar 25, 2026
+10481
If they start drafting for the military, i'm going to start smoking crack.
10481
--redacted--Mar 25, 2026
+3200
They'll just introduce a crack waiver
3200
MountainTwo3845Mar 25, 2026
+753
I can't believe I laughed harder at this than the smoking crack line. A waiver for just one time though.
753
technobobbleMar 25, 2026
+109
I bet there’s good money in trading in and counterfeiting the waivers. Dude’s would have piles of em💵💵💵
109
MittenCollyBulbasaurMar 25, 2026
+48
You mean I smoked all this crack for nothing?
48
InterconventionalMar 25, 2026
+2105
I’d probably rather be doing crack than in the Epstein wars.
2105
Either-Train6819Mar 25, 2026
+271
Weren’t German soldiers on crack or chronically drunk to deal with the atrocities they committed?
271
BicFleetwoodMar 25, 2026
+230
Amphetamines, which were used as combat stimulants.
It wasn't really for mental health. Nazis didn't give a f*** about that, beyond how degrading mental health resulted in less efficient atrocities. That *is* part of why they created industrial death machines as opposed to just shooting all of their victims--because the guys doing the shooting tended to go bugfuck.
But the meth was so they could keep operating on minimal sleep. Which didn't work out so well.
230
72616262697473757775Mar 25, 2026
+324
They were mostly on amphetamines to suppress their fear and stay alert. The average German soldier didn't give a f*** about their atrocities.
inb4 werhaboos say otherwise
edit: the werhaboos are saying otherwise. F*** off Nazis
324
ShadowNickMar 25, 2026
+132
"THEY WEREN'T ALL BAD"
As they literally document everything they did to anyone that disliked.
132
pinchofSalzMar 25, 2026
+49
Pervitin aka meth. It allowed them to stay up for longer periods, be more alert and require less food doing it.
49
[deleted]Mar 25, 2026
+286
[deleted]
286
GloomyPersimmon5219Mar 25, 2026
+108
Ur canteen is loaded up with monster energy. Thanks for your service
108
PraiseTheBeanpoleMar 25, 2026
+53
Start practicing the fenty lean.
53
LiveChocolate8819Mar 25, 2026
+93
That viral "I'll serve crack before I serve this country" tweet just came to mind.
93
Eagle4317Mar 25, 2026
+397
This is how MAGA will purge voters. Don't wanna get drafted and get sent off to die overseas? You'll be imprisoned and stripped of voting rights.
397
Murray38Mar 25, 2026
+359
Oh you enlisted and were sent overseas? Too bad we are taking away mail-in ballots too.
359
SerithiMar 25, 2026
+74
But not for Trump, he still gets to do mail-ins.
74
Confident-Barber-347Mar 25, 2026
+71
But I have bone spurs!
71
mrlazyboyMar 25, 2026
+128
Say you’re transgender it’s a no-starter
128
RespectTheAmishMar 25, 2026
+326
You’ll be sent to the other camps they are building instead.
326
InsipidCelebrityMar 25, 2026
+56
What if you're already being sent to the tism camps?
56
EuphoricAnalCarrotMar 25, 2026
+18
Wait till you hear about the Autistic-Transgender camps they're building
18
bisexualwizardMar 25, 2026
+76
So it turns out now also isn't a great time to tell the government that you're transgender...
76
caligaris_cabinetMar 25, 2026
+15
Off to the gulags
15
Cold-Permission-5249Mar 25, 2026
+18732
As someone who was born in 1984, there’s no way I’d be voluntarily enlisting at my age.
18732
TwelveGaugeSageMar 25, 2026
+7699
I enlisted at 26 and felt like I was stuck with a bunch of immature teenagers most of the time. The military is a young persons game for sure. I just can't imagine being in my 40s and getting punished because some idiot kid in my flight did something stupid.
7699
terdles1121Mar 25, 2026
+5281
Being in the military becomes infinitely more difficult once you start asking questions and start thinking about the stupid shit you have to do.
It is much easier to do what you're told when you're 18 and impressionable.
5281
digidave1Mar 25, 2026
+2940
And poor, or from a tiny town with no prospects
2940
BackgroundPoet2887Mar 25, 2026
+573
Yes, and that too
573
rW0HgFyxoJhYkaMar 25, 2026
+583
That's like everything to it. The people being pushed and recruited into the military are generally not the people who have options. Them raising it to 42 says that they can't attract anyone because the country's patriotism is at the lowest despite a cult existing
583
superindianslugMar 25, 2026
+282
The ones in the cult like to run around with guns cosplaying being in the military, they don't want to be in a situation where someone might actually shoot back.
282
MomikMar 25, 2026
+135
Yeah the last thing ICE thugs wanna face is an actual violent threat.
135
KDR_11kMar 25, 2026
+37
Besides, ICE hires tend to end up there after being rejected by the police and military.
37
yafflMar 25, 2026
+616
Poverty draft supports the military so much
616
Shot-Swimming-9098Mar 25, 2026
+573
The poverty draft has always been their thing. The fact that they're changing the age limit up to 42 really says something about what it's like out there for younger folks. I can only say "younger" because I'm older than that, but shit. Imagine being 40 and your best prospect is boot camp to become an enlisted. We are on the wrong track.
573
vardaracMar 25, 2026
+150
> We are on the wrong track.
Have been for decades.
150
AustinDarkoMar 25, 2026
+224
I didn't even think of this. I was thinking of older maga wanting to join the army cause they're indoctrinated but then there's a whole group of older people whose life has gone so poorly they'd join the army in their 40s. F***, that really puts things in perspective.
224
verendumMar 25, 2026
+201
None of the MAGA I know has 0 interest in joining. Mostly lip service, just like their messiah.
201
corvettee01Mar 25, 2026
+738
One of the dumbest things I remember doing in the Marines was having to load up a truck by hand, and it was thousands of pounds of gear that was already strapped down to pallets. They wanted us to unstrap everything, put the pallets in the truck, restack everything, and cinch it back down. Easily four or five hours of work.
But we were right next to Company Supply, so I popped over and asked if they had one of their forklift drivers available. They said he was at lunch and would be back in half an hour or so. I told command that we could either do everything by hand, spending hours of manual labor, or wait half an hour and get everything done with the forklift in like ten minutes.
They picked the hard manual labor, because these college educated USMC officers are shit for brain morons.
738
EmbarrassedW33BMar 25, 2026
+602
I know little of the Marines, but from what I've heard it seems likely they knew it was inefficient. But treating the grunts like shit is part of the culture, and you dared to voice an idea above your station too, so...hard manual labor. Its a punishment and it builds character, or something? Idk, its all insane hearing about it from the outside.
602
NAmember81Mar 25, 2026
+389
My Dad got shot and blown up with a grenade in the jungle of Vietnam and after he got out of the hospital he was sent to Germany.
While in Germany I guess somebody told him to say he was artist or something in order to avoid shitty work. A few weeks later an intimidating top brass military guy told him to paint a huge “horn of plenty” on his office wall. Lol
Needless to say he wasn’t really an artist, but he nervously painted a big azz horn of plenty the best he could. He says it turned out pretty good and had sort of an “impressionist” vibe to it.
When the guy got back in town and returned to his office a few days later my dad was terrified of how he’d react. But when he busted through the door and saw my dad’s masterpiece he was like “hmm.. good job..”
Then the next week the guy had painters paint all his office walls a single color and his masterpiece was gone. Lol
389
Shot-Swimming-9098Mar 25, 2026
+85
This is an interesting story. Is your dad still alive? There are so many "whys" to this story. Why have him paint it? Why tell him to be an artist? Why paint over it? Why make him do jack shit at all? Why would they give him shitty work and not laud him as a hero?
85
yagwaMar 25, 2026
+132
> Why have him paint it? Why tell him to be an artist?
Second question first.
Told him to say he was an artist because it was weak sounding and would hopefully put him on desk duty. If he nearly died in Vietnam then short of being sent right back to Vietnam, Germany was probably wasn't the place you wanted to be as the the Cold War perpetually had people on edge.
Told him to paint the horn to prove he was an artist and not bullshitting to get put on desk duty.
>Why paint over it?
Because the whole thing was about being a d*** to try and call his bluff. He didn't want a horn of plenty on his office wall. He wanted someone to make an example of.
>Why make him do jack shit at all? Why would they give him shitty work and not laud him as a hero?
The draft was active during Vietnam. If getting hurt was your ticket home, lots of drafted soldiers would have been reckless or created self-inflicted injuries. We don't send people home when they're wounded, we pin an award on them and tell them to get back in there and give the rest of themselves so that billionaires can make an extra buck and politicians can get extra votes. In America, we wave flags and say support the troops, but we don't actually do it. So we force them to fight, then we do a really shitty job of taking care of them once we deem their service sufficient.
132
DrZaiousMar 25, 2026
+112
That and they probably have nothing else for the grunts to do that day, so they turned a task into an all day thing.
112
Johnny-UnitasMar 25, 2026
+84
That's a lot of it. Keep them doing what they're told, keep them moving and therefore keep them fit.
84
mhornbergerMar 25, 2026
+31
Or afraid of what they'd get up to if they had too much time and energy on their hands.
31
pazonedMar 25, 2026
+13
to be fair, a bunch of stupid kids who are making more money then they've ever made and have all their stuff pretty much paid for can get into a lot of trouble, even with their shit pay, b/c they have nothing else to spend it on.
13
terdles1121Mar 25, 2026
+191
The psychology behind Marine boot camp and training is to literally tear apart your psyche and remold you in a way that fits their needs - someone that will follow orders without question, disregard the sense of self in place of "something bigger".
A lot of the things they do in Marine boot camp can be seen as forms of psychological torture. Sleep deprivation being one of the biggest ones, but you can't leave out the good old screaming in your face from an inch away with spit flying all over your face.
If you're psychologically and physically exhausted beyond what some people will ever feel in their lives, repeated very frequently over the course of 3 months, whatever propensity you may have to push back against stupid orders will deteriorate.
The military, and I would argue especially the Marines do a very good f****** job at giving people who usually come from economically disadvantaged areas or shitty/abusive families a massive sense of pride and fill them up full of purpose. Many of them having never felt that before ever in their lives.
The psychological abuse tempers down after you get out of boot camp. But then other forms of psychological manipulation comes into play, this being worse for infantry vs non infantry. While there is a bit of dehumanizing going on in boot camp, it ramps up after.
I speak from an infantry perspective where you are taught that you are the wolf, rest of society, and even your non infantry peers are sheep. You protect them because they are too dumb, weak willed, and generally weak to protect themselves. Then you are taught to see your opposition as subhuman, it is much easier to kill when you are able to see your adversary as less than human.
Lets not forget the hazing, it has gotten better than it was historically. But that further beats the sense of self out of you until you submit. Then you do it to the next boot drop, then they do it to the next boot drop. (Boot drop are when Marines who just finished school get shipped to their duty stations). You don't think, you don't ask questions, you follow orders. You think, you may start asking questions, you might question your orders. The Marines don't like that at all.
If you start asking why, what's the purpose of doing the shit you're ordered to do, good luck. It will become a rough ride. Especially for people who truly bought into everything going in. That's why many Marines who are smart, genuinely good humans bounce after an enlistment. You will see plenty of senior enlisted that will make you question their ability to function in the real world.
Then comes the best part! After all that, when you've been been beaten down, built back up in their vision, pumped full of pride and purpose, get tossed around on whatever deployments, missions, assignments, you say your farewell. You get your dd214 after a few weeks of transitional classes and peace out.
Many guys live for that day, live it up after discharge, then f****** crash. Along with your diacharge from the military, so goes your purpose as well. You're just another person in the sea, many hold onto the wolf vs sheep mentality and wonder why they struggle so much in day to day civilian living.
Source? Former crayon eater turned therapist for newer former crayon eaters and the likes.
191
SpiritualTwo5256Mar 25, 2026
+57
Thank you for un mind f****** these guys. We need people to follow evidence based proof not fake info from someone powerful. I have a buddy that can’t understand how much propaganda he was fed about Muslims. He hates them so much irrationally.
57
Mirria_Mar 25, 2026
+105
Someone mentioned they were in the Air Force and they had a joint meeting with the marines about I don't remember what, but he gave a "common sense" comment to the marines Major which caused all present marine grunts to wince and him getting chewed out.
105
DorkusMalorkussMar 25, 2026
+44
All you have to know, to compare the treatment of people between branches, is to know that in the Air Force we call each other sir and maam regardless of rank. I was a brand new Airman, straight out of basic and at my first duty station, and I would have Sergeants coming to my office and saying "good morning sir". I mean, yes of course there's bullshit too, but that gives you a small insight into how people are seen amongst one another regardless of rank (for the record, I qas not maintenance soooo yeah)
44
wotqueryMar 25, 2026
+59
The idea is to so rigorously ingrain the concept of following orders without thinking that soldiers will be able to follow an order to charge into gun fire without thinking. Obviously there is some sort of balance, e.g. U.S. troops in WWII were known for initiative and adaptability at low levels of authority compared to old school continental military hierarchies.
59
Shot-Swimming-9098Mar 25, 2026
+28
> U.S. troops in WWII were known for initiative and adaptability at low levels
This has been a trademark of US armed forces for a long time. The idea is some west point grad runs the unit with a grunt who's made officer, and everybody does what they're told, but they also report up what they know. This all goes away under fascism. This regime is going to trickle down on the military, and it's all going to go to shit.
28
PalatronMar 25, 2026
+99
They didn't have anything else for you to do. So to keep you busy, they told you to manually load the truck.
Also, everyone knows you don't ask for permission, you ask for forgiveness.
Lastly, officers shouldn't be telling you how to load the truck. They should be telling you the truck needs to be loaded and an NCO gets with the marines and loads it up so the officer can inspect it once it's complete.
99
AdFlaky9983Mar 25, 2026
+141
There was a guy in my cycle that had an age waiver, I believe he was 40. I was maybe 6 months into being 18 years old and after the first set of squad leaders fucked up a few weeks in I was set as a squad leader which included him. It felt SO f****** weird to make sure a 40 year old had his ruck straight.
141
TwelveGaugeSageMar 25, 2026
+60
Yeah, I was older than my training instructor, then most of my supervisors. It was weird, especially with as immature as most of them were.
60
Letsgobuffalo2210Mar 25, 2026
+572
My first line when I was in was 36 when he joined. By the time I met him, he was a 39 year old e5. Honestly, he was in better shape than anybody and could beat the shit out of our entire company lmao. But yeah, f*** that. I was over it when I got out at 25.
572
JustADutchRudderMar 25, 2026
+428
I'm 40 and would laugh and laugh if they drafted me. Sure I'll show up, but I'm smoking weed non-stop and they're on the hook for fixing my trashed knee and shoulder, they also might wanna remove the mainy little bolts and plates in my right hand. Sounds fun, I'm not running they can just shoot me.
428
Infinite_Dress_3312Mar 25, 2026
+87
Man Russia is sending guys in their 50s and 60s into the meat grinder
87
compute_fail_24Mar 25, 2026
+397
I’d prob rather rot in a cell than fight Trump’s war
397
arbitrageMEMar 25, 2026
+176
every senator and the president's kids and grandkids have to go first
176
Ok-Comment6081Mar 25, 2026
+33
Nah Opposite Day that shit. We go to the offices to sign legislation and the senators and presidential families get my M4, MREs, and toothbrush for cleaning floors
33
Auerbach1991Mar 25, 2026
+74
**why do you think they keep building those nice new prisons all over the Country?**
People dodging the draft, tossed in with people ICE pick up, to get dissenters out of public view and to lower turnout for elections.
74
IShookMeAllNightLongMar 25, 2026
+47
They are prepping for World War III
47
micholobMar 25, 2026
+63
I'm 40. My doctor gave me a note that said I can't have guns but she didn't say anything about bombs.
63
Live-Laugh-FartMar 25, 2026
+27
Uhh..They won’t fix shit though. You see what’s happening in Russia? That’s basically what the US is becoming. If they’re drafting 40 year olds, it’s bc 40 year olds are getting sent to the front as drone fodder.
27
phoenixmatrixMar 25, 2026
+278
I feel like if I was in the military I'd be more afraid of my peers doing something stupid and childish than the enemy.
278
FineScratchMar 25, 2026
+278
Can confirm. You cannot fathom the depths of stupidity an 18 year old with an enlistment bonus
"Sapphire said she loves me! I'm driving up to the church to marry her this weekend. Wer even signed a helluva deal on a new Hellcat!"
107
Adjective-Noun1780Mar 25, 2026
+51
Now imagine listing at 34 1/2. The only other person near my age I last saw on crutches. Teens were squabbling in the barracks as if in high school cliques. But boy did they recover fast from injury or illness compared to me.
51
stoicdozerMar 25, 2026
+168
I was 19 when I was in Iraq. I was a sarcastic little shit that liked to talk back. At 38 now, I would annihilate that mouthy kid.
168
BrianG1410Mar 25, 2026
+100
I had to stir/burn shit barrels in Afghanistan for being a sarcastic ass to an NCO over the radio 😅
100
CosgraveSilkweaverMar 25, 2026
+160
We have determined your diagnosis is not service related.
160
BrianG1410Mar 25, 2026
+73
I had to do it for 2 straight weeks too 🤮 in the Afghan heat the shit barrels would be pulsating with maggots by the time I got to them.
73
HYIMBYMar 25, 2026
+20
I really think they should have separate boot camps based off age and experience
20
Stay_at_Home_ChadMar 25, 2026
+198
I went to Basic at 19. Thinking about doing that again at 43 makes my knees hurt. And my back. And my ankles.
198
CiDevantMar 25, 2026
+79
That's f****** desperate as hell. I'm a vet, also 42. Most of my friends who stayed in are retired now. That's actually insane now that I think about it.
79
jackel3415Mar 25, 2026
+240
Same. But I think it’s so he can justify a draft in our 40s
240
AazadanMar 25, 2026
+60
Ahh yes, draft the millennials, that will teach them to ruin everything. Then draft their kids at the same time.
60
Low_Pickle_112Mar 25, 2026
+169
With the economy continuing it's spiral, I could see it also as a way to prey on the desperate. If people can't afford housing or food, in comes the local military recruiter, right after their trip to your nearest high school to tell the kids that murdering someone else's kids is their best option for higher education in the greatest country ever.
Mind you, squatting in vacant "luxury" apartments and shoplifting from MegaMart is a far more ethical way to survive than going abroad to blow up schoolgirls for some bloodthirsty imperialist child rapist war pig billionaires...and should one make that choice, the moral accountability is still on them regardless, let's be very clear about that...but some people will nonetheless go for it.
169
pants6000Mar 25, 2026
+27
It's true. The military is the USA's version of socialism.
Want higher education? Want insurance? Just sign up to do a few years of running, toilet cleaning, and perhaps a bit of shooting/being shot at first.
27
Warlord68Mar 25, 2026
+152
You don’t wanna die in a foreign land so others can get rich?!?
152
nedal8Mar 25, 2026
+33
What a fuckin commie amrite?!
33
yamirzmmdxMar 25, 2026
+1345
As long as they didn't raise the age cut off for the draft.
1345
facw00Mar 25, 2026
+707
Still only allows men under 27 to be drafted. No one older than 26 has been drafted since 1945 (Congress passed a law allowing men up to 45 to be drafted during WWII, but it's hard to see Congress raising the eligibility age these days)
707
datCASgoBRRMar 25, 2026
+1215
The GOP would bellycrawl over broken glass if Dear Leader told them to do it.
1215
Braindead_CrowMar 25, 2026
+279
Or turn a blind eye to over a year of the worst market manipulation the world has seen from a country in modern history...
Or the most blatant child predator...
279
terp_raiderMar 25, 2026
+320
You folks who keep talking like Congress or any real precedent actually still matters boggle my mind lol
320
Own-Poetry-9609Mar 25, 2026
+103
Exactly
"The president needs congressional approval to go to war"
"Congress wouldn't declare a war against Iran"
Like that any of that shit matters nowadays
103
save_the_winosMar 25, 2026
+113
I’m sure they will try soon.
113
BallinTacklinGaminMar 25, 2026
+131
I’ll see y’all in prison or Canada I guess.
131
GiveMeSumChonChonMar 25, 2026
+36
Insurgency it is
36
odiouscatMar 25, 2026
+2099
They are also welcoming prior service to come back to the military up to age 49. That's just f****** nuts. No thank you. I've done more than enough for our crumbling government throughout my life.
2099
cookiebasket2Mar 25, 2026
+473
The only reason I'd even entertain it at this point is because I could speed run getting to 100% disability, now that I wouldn't listen to leadership saying to not document shit or go to sick call.
473
Drostan_SMar 25, 2026
+96
Yeah I'm thirty something, every time I fall in going to the infirmary. If I sneeze one time too many during my sneezing fits I'm going to talk to a doctor.
96
ScrotalSmorgasbordMar 25, 2026
+15
They wouldn't want me back in the infantry. My knees and elbows and toes and pretty much everything else are too loud. I was in a surveillance/recon infantry company attached to some cav scouts/light cavalry units. I'd have to be mechanized this time around as there's no way I could be sneaky.
15
FixFun1959Mar 25, 2026
+26
lol I’m a vet, voluntarily separated as a staff sergeant at 33 and got 100% VA disability cause I’m so f****** broken.
I can’t imagine waiting another 10 years then walking into a recruiters office.
26
DisillusionedPatriotMar 25, 2026
+132
Kinda like Russia. Feels desperate. To say im disappointed, would be an understatement.
132
nosecohnMar 25, 2026
+18
Exactly what I was thinking. These are the kinds of headlines we've been reading about the Russian army for the last four years.
18
gold_and_diamondMar 25, 2026
+4757
It seems to me if you truly support Trump, now is the time to prove it and enlist.
4757
Ohio_galMar 25, 2026
+1134
Draft Baron, jr. and Eric. Hell, Tiffany too.
1134
R3dbeardLFCMar 25, 2026
+438
Pete doesn't want women cuz he doesn't want to share the makeup chair.
438
human_eyesMar 25, 2026
+47
Hahahahah thanks I needed a laugh
47
rammo123Mar 25, 2026
+28
We should really be drafting people that Trump actually cares about though. So draft Ghislaine Maxwell.
28
0fficerGeorgeGreenMar 25, 2026
+229
Seriously. If you support the Iran war, go on and get ready to head over there. If that sounds ridiculous, you're right. This all is truly ridiculous and you should stop supporting it.
229
NotAnotherBlingBlopMar 25, 2026
+117
Too bad 100% of MAGA are giant pussies.
117
FillFrontFloorMar 25, 2026
+61
I mean, I know many enlist for the "free college", but what would the incentive be for a 40 year old? They are at a career age if they join they'll come back to a weaker career, def won't get promotions. It's honestly a terrible age in modern society.
61
SerithiMar 25, 2026
+67
Even the free college and stuff was phasing out. There's genuinely no real reason to enlist.
67
dr_wheelMar 25, 2026
+22
ICE didn't seem to have a problem with finding 12,000 new shitbags to sign up this year, many of which are 40+ y/o mall ninjas.
I have to imagine a fair portion of those dudes have very poor job prospects and are so upside down with credit card debt, child support, and 75k pickup truck payments that they will be enticed into enlisting.
22
StopReadingThis-NowMar 25, 2026
+108
If you own a red MAGA hat you get sent to the front lines of Iran with a cool red mustang waiting for you when you totally get back.
108
BiBoFieToMar 25, 2026
+2661
Too late. ICE grabbed up all the middle aged Call of Duty cosplayers.
2661
EntertainmentFew7103Mar 25, 2026
+539
Isn’t ICE’s training like a 3 day MAGA rally? They couldn’t even pass a PFT.
539
Coulrophiliac444Mar 25, 2026
+138
Two week correspondence course to ~~University of Phoenix Online~~ Trump University.
138
r0botdevilMar 25, 2026
+92
None of those ICE dipshits would've enlisted anyway.
They have zero no interest in an actual fight, they just wanna push unarmed civilians around.
92
hifidadMar 25, 2026
+290
I’ve broke my leg before and will break it again if I need to.
290
pantry-pisserMar 25, 2026
+50
I got artificial hips. Think they'd give me one of those sweet DARPA exoskeleton rigs?
50
DaKingaDaNorthMar 25, 2026
+1912
Is this like a 4/20 joke?
1912
sljxuoxadaMar 25, 2026
+504
It actually is. Check the date.
504
DragonflyFabulous489Mar 25, 2026
+250
Its today's date
250
znightmareeMar 25, 2026
+406
Goes into effect on 4/20
406
BullShitting-24-7Mar 25, 2026
+332
US gov is run by 4channers.
332
VanZandtVSMar 25, 2026
+1163
Oh, the administration needs fodder for its unlawful warmongering? Nah, get fucked.
1163
ZardotabMar 25, 2026
+300
Maybe they found out the hard way that LGBTQ+ harassment and Hegseth's performative appearance rules reduced recruiting rates below target?
300
SnapingboltsMar 25, 2026
+201
To turn away people who would willingly join the military over "woke ideology" was so short sighted and stupid
201
ZardotabMar 25, 2026
+91
Zealots and rationality don't get along.
91
QaraKhaMar 25, 2026
+59
recruiting rates were already below target, they literally couldn't find people that were capable enough, and this was even during the Biden admin. That's WITH LGBTQ+ people joining, WITH women being able to join for combat and field roles.
The problem is exactly the same ICE had. The only ones who want to join are inbred Nazi fucks or obsequious tokens who pretend to be "one of the good ones."
59
KemkanMar 25, 2026
+344
Lol! I knew they would drop the weed rules when I read soldiers were testing dirty on purpose to get out of this godforsaken war.
344
Educational-Ad-2884Mar 25, 2026
+153
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
153
-_danglebury_-Mar 25, 2026
+42
According to the article the rule change is meant for new recruits who are joining, not active duty currently serving.
It makes previous marijuana charges easier to gain a waiver for, if a potential recruit is trying to enlist.
42
FarrudarMar 25, 2026
+178
So Baron can enlist. Just waive the height stuff.
178
JimboTCBMar 25, 2026
+20
Unfortunately those hereditary bone spurs are going to start acting up right when his draft papers come through.
20
Cos_SoBeMar 25, 2026
+61
MAGA, this is your chance, join now and go give your life for Trump and Hegseth
61
Competitive_Fee_5829Mar 25, 2026
+194
LOL, retired Navy here and the Army must be f****** desperate
194
masterbuilder14Mar 25, 2026
+70
Thats cause they are!
70
TronvillainMar 25, 2026
+50
My coworker: "We had a guy with us who enlisted at 27. You know what we called him? Pops."
50
not_so_subtle_nowMar 25, 2026
+51
I joined when I was 21 and they called me old man.
51
ProbablySlackingMar 25, 2026
+130
I’m 42 right now… it’s laughable to think I could enlist.
Not that I’m not in shape — I’m very in shape. But there’s a certain brainwashing that goes into being in the army and it’s hard to think of anyone my age shifting their entire worldview to fit that.
130
StungTwiceMar 25, 2026
+106
Just imagine someone born in 2002 trying to intimidate you
106
ProbablySlackingMar 25, 2026
+47
Oh man. I didn’t even think of that angle. That’s hilarious.
It’s almost enough to make me want to try it.
47
zimzaraMar 25, 2026
+20
Say *who's a good wittle dwill sergeant* as you pinch their cheek.
20
StungTwiceMar 25, 2026
+13
Oh, you've done it now. He's going to point all his fingers at once at you SO hard
13
MarkM338985Mar 25, 2026
+247
42 years old? I was 19 and barely made it. We had guys 26 and failing. Back then very few recruits were overweight or out of shape. Good luck army!
247
earthcelticMar 25, 2026
+205
They're not looking for people who win. They are looking for people who are stupid enough to die and perpetuate a distraction.
205
MarkM338985Mar 25, 2026
+55
No doubt but a 42 year old has a different view of mortality.
55
Gentle_methodMar 25, 2026
+256
Are they really thinking about invading Iran?
256
lookieherehereMar 25, 2026
+128
They deployed the airborne. You don't deploy the airborne for a "peace keeping mission".
128
BigbigbigrockMar 25, 2026
+91
My coworkers son is enlisting in the marines and he's so positive that he won't ever see combat. I'm really hoping he's right but holy shit that seems like such an insane bet to take.
Edit: to be clear my coworker thinks his son will not see combat. I've no idea what his son thinks about seeing combat.
91
p4ttythep3rf3ctMar 25, 2026
+126
He is 100% wrong.
126
Pale-Factor-8574Mar 25, 2026
+414
Yes. And those troops will be walking into the meat grinder from hell. Iran has been preparing for this invasion for two decades.
414
compute_fail_24Mar 25, 2026
+100
Not to mention the terrain f****** sucks for an invasion. This is gonna be a bloodbath
100
Equal-Temporary-1326Mar 25, 2026
+30
And the Trump Administration seems to be more than willing to sacrifice many American lives to fight a war for a foreign country.
30
Infamous-Sky-1874Mar 25, 2026
+196
Try four decades
196
canisdirusarctosMar 25, 2026
+68
Over four decades. Roughly since Reagan was inaugurated the first time in 1981.
68
No-Good-One-ShoeMar 25, 2026
+81
Are Americans ready to see their sons and daughters dying in 4k?
81
UWMNMar 25, 2026
+33
If a civil war were to start, announcing a draft would be the time. Nobody (other than MAGA’s most obedient followers) wants to die/see their loved ones die for this administration.
33
iskinMar 25, 2026
+17
Yep, sometime after the markets close this Friday and before Sunday afternoon.
17
I_am_not_JohnLeClairMar 25, 2026
+143
Enlist? With Rapey McRaperson at the helm? I. Think. Not.
143
SuperkickPartyMar 25, 2026
+556
As a stoner who just turned 40 last Thursday, Go f*** yourself 😎
556
ObvsThrowaway5120Mar 25, 2026
+36
Boy, they must be getting really desperate.
36
MatervaMar 25, 2026
+62
F*** off, “bone spurs” draft dogging Taco.
62
parker1019Mar 25, 2026
+59
Need more cannon fodder for misdirection….
TRUMP IS A RAPIST PEDOPHILE MENTIONED OVER **38,000 TIMES** IN THE EPSTEIN FILES
59
gorktMar 25, 2026
+51
Waiting for all those MAGA dudes to step up.
51
cygnusX1and2Mar 25, 2026
+51
How about an even higher age limit for magas.
It would be tremendous.
Some say it could be the mightiest army ever.
51
Admirable-Trip5452Mar 25, 2026
+68
Bruh I’m 38, fat, and have a blown out back. If these bitches start drafting ima switch up to being a fent leaning transgender woman quicker than JD Vance gets sprung at the LaZBoy store.
68
ScarycloudsMar 25, 2026
+100
Man what do you have to have going in your life to enlist at *42*?! I feel like anyone who’d be in reasonably good shape physically/mentally, like myself (40), will have a stable/good career. Anyone who’d might see enlisting in that army around my age would have to be an absolute wreck physically and mentally.
100
ItsWillJohnsonMar 25, 2026
+21
Idk if you’ve seen Job numbers lately. Im 38 and unemployed for a few months now, if there was some way to make sure I’d never actually deploy to a war zone I’d be looking into this. Maybe in 4 years
21
Michael_G_BordinMar 25, 2026
+57
I knew a guy who enlisted in the Army at like 25. He was a deadbeat loser who just wanted to kill people. The Army washed him out because he's a psycho. Same with police academy. He's been working on becoming a security contractor for as long as I can remember, and I'm pretty sure those psych evaluations are sticking to him. From what I know, he lives in some rural bumfuck area posting facebook ramblings about the government coming after him. He's like 40.
If they lower the "no unhinged psychos" standard, I could see him getting back into it. He's at least in great physical shape. But to your point, definitely a wreck mentally and no stable/good career.
57
VeldoxMar 25, 2026
+26
So he's probably one of the new ICE recruits.
26
KineticBombardment99Mar 25, 2026
+18
At the moment, after tens of thousands of layoffs in all kinds of white-collar jobs, there are a lot more 35-45yo folks without stable careers than folks think. Doesn't stop them from being cool, regular people in good shape. They just got screwed and now are maybe desperate enough to try out the Army.
18
dannylewMar 25, 2026
+23
f****** country is being ran by man children
23
nosilverbirdMar 25, 2026
+19
42yo COD cosplaying PV2s reporting to 25yo NCOs is devastatingly hilarious work. This is truly a bright red indicator of a failing society.
19
quaglandx3Mar 25, 2026
+22
Thank f*** I’m 50. F*** dying for this country.
22
Various-Salt488Mar 25, 2026
+18
This is the Russian meat grinder philosophy. Americans are going to die for the Epstein class and Israel. These people don’t give a shit about you.
This syphilitic old f**k is going to get HUNDREDS of thousands of people killed and all because Kamala had a funny laugh.
18
Have_A_Jelly_BabyMar 25, 2026
+68
Just turned 46, and I’m a relatively short drive to Canada a few different ways.
I’ll be damned if I’m going to go get blown up for that orange piece of shit.
68
DoomScrollingAppaMar 25, 2026
+139
At 41, there’s no way I could possibly be physically fit to enlist
139
finnjakefionnacakeMar 25, 2026
+66
of course you could be, there are hella fit 41 year olds.
but that's besides the point because f*** going off to fight some meaningless war over some shit we didn't decide.
66
Sekshual_TyranosauceMar 25, 2026
+17
Begun the Epstein Wars have.
17
independently_mindedMar 25, 2026
+33
lol. Pretty sure they underestimate people’s willingness to just not show up en masse, particularly those who indulge in the devil’s lettuce. Not to mention the overwhelming pushback instituting a draft would have, regardless of political affiliation. No one really wants this war, even if they’ve been convinced it’s necessary, and ‘duty to country’ is at an all time low, regardless of how patriotic you espouse to be.
33
McCool303Mar 25, 2026
+61
Desperate for more body bags for Trumps and Hegseth’s meat grinder I see.
61
strolpolMar 25, 2026
+14
Time for the ultimate midlife crisis move
14
BosfordjdMar 25, 2026
+47
No one that isn't desperate for a paycheck would join a military run by the least qualified sec def in history Holy War Hegseth to die for Israel....these kids have had the Internet they've seen all the folly of the middle east unfold on YouTube...and grown up under the least respected buffoon of a president in history who has gaudy gold toilets and a 4th grade speaking level and rapes kids...they're under no illusion America is great or righteous anymore lol.
Gotta expand the pool some how until you can get another solid Republican economic crash phased in to increase poverty levels and desperation.
47
bald_and_nerdyMar 25, 2026
+13
Start with ICE. They want to be soldiers, this is their lucky day.
13
MrSpiffyTrousersMar 25, 2026
+28
Sure, Pete, I'm 38 and my knees are starting to crack every time i lean down to play with my cat. You know what sounds great, though? Speedrunning the destruction of the rest of my body solely to preserve Israeli lebensraum. I can't wait to get blown up in a bivouac 8k miles away at the behest of some drug-addled aspiring Mad Max warlords whose full strategic knowledge comes from Call of Duty and gambling on Kalshi.
28
StopReadingThis-NowMar 25, 2026
+52
Lmao get fucked. Obvious what he's trying to do, too late sucka.
200 Comments