50% of the comments telling chuck norris jokes. The other half is talking about him being an a****** lol
117
ShoulderSquirrelVTMar 20, 2026
+45
Well, that’s what happens when you’re famous AND an a******.
45
SourceScopeMar 20, 2026
+16
He is an a******
But the jokes about him can be funny
They arent written by him
16
BubuhbuhMar 19, 2026
+414
Chuck Norris saw people working at least 20 hours a week in Hawaii get health insurance, and he got a stroke.
414
mydadabortedmeMar 19, 2026
+89
Yeah but it’s hard as f*** there to get a full time job somewhere and the rate of pay is so low compared to COL that you end up working 3 jobs. Source: born and raised on Oahu
89
Nick_ArinMar 19, 2026
+18
It’s all pain bbg. Kalihi and Chinatown say hello.
18
TheyJustCallMeDadMar 19, 2026
+1108
I pray for the hospitals speedy recovery.
1108
dtseng123Mar 19, 2026
+107
Came here for this
107
surrealcellardoorMar 20, 2026
+13
Me too
13
Tenderness10Mar 19, 2026
+1270
I think you’ve misread the article. It clearly says that Chuck Norris hospitalised his medical emergency. Which is not surprising. He is Chuck Norris, after all.
1270
MarkCuckerberg69420Mar 19, 2026
+570
You must be dyslexic. The headline states "Hawaii Hospitalized After Medical Emergency with Chuck Norris".
570
Tenderness10Mar 19, 2026
+139
I apologise, you’re absolutely right.
139
_NobleRotMar 19, 2026
+53
Maui can’t catch a break.
53
PippyTheZinheadMar 19, 2026
+31
It happened on Kauai.
31
TheNonCredibleHulkMar 19, 2026
+39
Maui was collateral damage
39
rosco2155Mar 19, 2026
+14
As was all of Jack Johnson’s guitars :(
14
HateYourFacesMar 19, 2026
+8
Are we living in the prequel to “Moana”?
8
ThomasRedstoneIIIMar 20, 2026
+2
Best news all week
2
-Nightopian-Mar 19, 2026
+5
That's because Maui was hospitalized.
5
IRDragonBorneMar 19, 2026
+4
Maui caught something, all of Hawaii is hospitalized
4
Even-Macaroon-1661Mar 19, 2026
+24
Hawaii was only one island before Chuck Norris landed on it
24
EnjoyLifeorDieTryinMar 19, 2026
+8
Are you guys serious? It literally says “Hospital Chuck Norrisized after medical emergency in Hawaii”
8
Digital_Legend52Mar 19, 2026
+42
Bro is going to have the most unserious funeral in the history of funerals.
42
QuietQuitting01Mar 19, 2026
+9
I would not want to be a grave digger.
>!Because you don't bury Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris burys you.!<
9
JustJJ92Mar 19, 2026
+180
Nah he’s maga. He’s been hospitalized because he turned into a b****
180
Recent_MirrorMar 19, 2026
+43
Wait. Is he really?
God damnit
43
Built4dominanceMar 19, 2026
+22
Dude, he's been a right-winger all his life.
22
JalapenoJammMar 19, 2026
+74
Are you genuinely surprised
74
cerialthrillerMar 19, 2026
+30
Yeah not sure what alternate timeline would have Chuck Norris be a decent person irl
30
mr_friend_computerMar 20, 2026
+4
fair play, but there was a clip of him breaking down crying on TV while reading "chuck norris" jokes. He actually had to stop because he couldn't get past the one about cancer being afraid of chuck norris (or some such).
"I wish it were true, I really wish it was".
So, there is a tiny little normal human being in there somewhere.
4
TakitishHoserMar 19, 2026
+8
He's been a b**** for a while.
Someone wrote a joke book "The Truth About Chuck Norris", Chuck Norris sued them & then tried to write his own joke book.
Chuck Norris sues author, publisher of 'The Truth About Chuck Norris'
[https://www.cbc.ca/news/entertainment/chuck-norris-sues-author-publisher-of-the-truth-about-chuck-norris-1.662216](https://www.cbc.ca/news/entertainment/chuck-norris-sues-author-publisher-of-the-truth-about-chuck-norris-1.662216)
8
CheeseMclovinMar 20, 2026
+3
That should surprise no one that the Texas ranger is maga
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck fucked Chuck Norris?
9
Daily-Double1124Mar 19, 2026
+7
My dad taught me that rhyme when I was a little girl. Thank you for unlocking that special memory--Dad passed away 9 years ago.
7
TwodogsonecouchMar 19, 2026
+4
Dammit walker.
What about the dos equis guy. Can i still like him. Jason Statham still not insane right. Hes kinda former chuck norris glory
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ouie3peYaTg
4
The_Mellow_TigerMar 19, 2026
+5
Watch his outtakes from that. It's hysterical.
5
thelouisfanclubMar 19, 2026
+5
Man, it's been years since I heard a Chuck Norris joke... Super nostalgic!
5
Lord-TardigradeMar 19, 2026
+7
Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience
7
the_main_entranceMar 19, 2026
+118
So for anybody actually wanting to know what happened, I work at a sky diving company in Waimea.
He and a group jumped earlier today and his parachute did not deploy. We were informed by his legal team that he would be personally returning the chute and collecting his refund tomorrow.
118
HAVOC34Mar 19, 2026
+40
I hope they inspected the island for damage if that’s true.
40
the_main_entranceMar 19, 2026
+12
There was a massive crater left….
12
thebigmeatheadMar 19, 2026
+79
It's Obama's fault. That presidential ad he did during the Obama election was one of the most bizarre ads I've ever seen.
79
Ancient_Awareness_71Mar 19, 2026
+34
1000 years of darkness!!!
34
Wolv90Mar 19, 2026
+9
Why was he rushed to a hospital, he's a Christian fundamentalist, shouldn't prayer be enough?
9
Dairy_AshfordMar 19, 2026
+2
that's a Christian Scientist
2
ElectrOPuristMar 19, 2026
+508
I feel bad for the staff who have to treat this malignant sack of shit.
508
steezy_or_notsteezyMar 19, 2026
+296
This. And I hate all of the jokes about how tough he was, too. He's a little guy who did everything in front of movie cameras.
296
IndependentOpinion44Mar 19, 2026
+177
We didn’t know what a prick he was when that meme got going.
It was still funny at the time.
177
QuietQuitting01Mar 19, 2026
+8
It's still funny. I laugh **at** Kid Rock a lot too.
8
[deleted]Mar 19, 2026
+11
[deleted]
11
IndependentOpinion44Mar 19, 2026
+72
We really didn’t. It’s hard to imagine now, but back then, hardly anyone knew what a celebrity’s political affiliation was. Politics was no where near as polarised as it is now.
72
SidneyDeane10Mar 19, 2026
+2
I didn't know until I just read this - what's the deal?
2
Current--AnythingMar 19, 2026
+11
Sexist, racist, homophobic, ultra far right asshat
11
AgentCirceLunaMar 20, 2026
+2
No need to call them all that - they only asked what Chuck Norris did.
2
VoopityScoopMar 19, 2026
+10
Chuck Norris, the 80's macho man action star from Oklahoma, is a Republican. "Fork found in kitchen" situation.
10
ElectrOPuristMar 19, 2026
+109
He wasn’t even tough enough to ever crack the spine of a single book.
109
JedM13Mar 19, 2026
+29
I feel like I’m missing some context here..
29
caboose243Mar 19, 2026
+85
He's maga
85
BaggyLarjjjMar 19, 2026
+57
And a Christian nationalist
57
Rogue_Ninja_TacoMar 19, 2026
+33
And an evolution denier.
33
LargofarburnMar 19, 2026
+19
And just plain unpleasant.
19
recfuelMar 20, 2026
+2
And a ginger
2
SmackedWithARulerMar 19, 2026
+3
Oh f***. That’s such a massive bummer.
3
BetterLog1855Mar 19, 2026
+13
You're wrong. He fought for real as well.
13
Wolv90Mar 19, 2026
+8
Yeah, he fought to put bibles in public schools and he fought to take science out of science class.
8
YontevnknowMar 19, 2026
+13
I think what he is trying to say is that unlike Steven Segal, a worthless piece of shit who pretends to know martial arts, Chuck Norris is a piece of shit who was actually an accomplished martial artist before acting.
13
zakl2112Mar 20, 2026
+2
Oh shit, his only clim to fame is getting his ass kicked by Bruce fukin Lee
2
all4montyMar 19, 2026
+16
The memes/jokes were always making fun of him. His movies/shows were always so bad and ridiculous. Conan had a Walker Texas Ranger lever that would just show clips of the show and that was the whole punchline because it was just so bad and ridiculous. The real joke behind the memes is that someone in these terrible and cheesy movies was tough in real life to a ridiculous degree. It was like taking star wars kid and inserting him in an actual battle. No one actually thought he was tough, but if you are far enough removed from the origin, you may miss the point
16
Designer_Ad_3664Mar 19, 2026
+14
karate is goofy as shit but he's still gonna kick everyone's ass. he's got like 200 professional fights and won world titles. plus he's got black belts in judo and bjj.
there's levels to fighting, bro. people who get paid to fight are typically pretty f****** good at it.
14
JeffuaryMar 19, 2026
+11
As much of a shithead he is, this is absolutely false. Read up on his professional career.
11
BeefInGRMar 19, 2026
+24
Yeah, one of the reasons why people were hurt by Norris supporting Trump is that he was far from a phoney. He was the hype.
24
TheTelephoneMar 20, 2026
+2
Chuck Norris sucks d*** for bus fare and walks home.
2
AP_in_IndyMar 19, 2026
+3
This is absolutely false. Chuck Norris was undefeated in martial arts.
In fact, Bruce Lee was more of a "for the cameras" guy than Chuck Norris was.
But the myth and legend behind Bruce Lee was so severe that you can't say that to people without them flipping out.
At Chuck's peak - which was around the same time as Bruce Lee's peak - Chuck almost certainly would have beaten Bruce Lee in a spar or tournament fight.
3
so-much-wowMar 19, 2026
+2
That's Jackie Chan. Chuck Norris was a legitimate competitive karate fighter before his movie time. Doesn't detract from the shit heel aspect, but dude can fight.
2
GoodtimeZappaMar 19, 2026
+2
Look at his record.
2
DavianVonLorringMar 19, 2026
+7
If MAGA has proven anything to us, it's that they are all a bunch of gigantic pussies.
7
[deleted]Mar 19, 2026
[deleted]
0
MakeVioMar 19, 2026
+6
Oh nooo you've been walking around being angry at jokes for 20 years
6
iamstephen1128Mar 19, 2026
+26
Im clearly ootl, is there a good summary somewhere of why he's such a shit?
26
tallwhiteninjaMar 19, 2026
+98
He's a h******* conservative Christian. He has vocally been against same-sex marriage and LGBTQ+ rights and bought into the Obama birther nonsense.
98
Money-Giraffe2427Mar 19, 2026
+10
sounds like the average american
10
BorkieDorkie811Mar 19, 2026
+55
He's written columns for WordNetDaily (a far-right, conspiracy filled, "news" site). He's promoted bans on gay marriage, bans on gay kids in Boy Scouts, Obama birther conspiracies, Islamophobic conspiracy theories, intelligent design, and hawkish policies regarding the Middle East.
He's also an outspoken Christian, while being a serial philanderer.
Edit: spelling
55
qweef_latina2021Mar 19, 2026
+17
No hate like Christian love.
17
calimarigrilMar 19, 2026
+8
Same, as a kid I only knew about him from TV and then as a teenager there were so many memes about him, but I haven’t heard anything about him for such a long time I genuinely thought he was dead
8
iamstephen1128Mar 19, 2026
+5
The only reason I knew he wasn't dead was because I was sure I would have heard the classic styled jokes 😅
5
MikoWilson1Mar 19, 2026
+10
I knew he was a POS when he said that Barack Obama winning the election would "usher in 1,000 years of darkness" for the United States.
Interesting and intentional choice of words there.
He's a dog whistlin' racist.
10
ErstwhileHoboMar 19, 2026
Republican, I assume.
0
whichwitch9Mar 19, 2026
+26
Well, the openly anti-lbgtq+ views are definitely found more in Republicans, but I pretty much hate bigots of any political party
26
just_fucking_PEG_MEMar 19, 2026
+72
Met him on a flight once a few years ago. Very nice guy, but he’s in much rougher shape than we’ve been led to believe in recent years. He needed help getting up from his seat and had a (not terribly well hidden) colostomy bag. I’m guessing all his years of stunts and martial arts took their toll, but yeah. Chuck Norris jokes aside, he’s still human.
72
dengar_hennessyMar 19, 2026
+45
Well he is 86 years old
45
MikoWilson1Mar 19, 2026
-1
I bet he wouldn't have been nice to you if you were gay or black.
Just so we're clear, your profile says you're a liar, and a whole lot more.
-1
just_fucking_PEG_MEMar 19, 2026
+16
I mean, I’m both and he was.
16
Less_Treacle_9608Mar 19, 2026
+11
Ha that was funny ( checks profile ) OH MY GOD!
11
Affectionate-Oil3019Mar 20, 2026
+12
How do I delete someone else's profile from the internet?
12
bobbingtonbobssonMar 19, 2026
+4
r/eyebleach needed
4
Xialuna999Mar 19, 2026
+3
LMAO! Same reaction
3
MikoWilson1Mar 20, 2026
+2
At first I though you were laughing at how wrong I was, lol -- then I checked his profile.
2
Current--AnythingMar 19, 2026
+6
People can be nice to your face and still fight to have your rights stripped from you
6
Rogue_Ninja_TacoMar 19, 2026
+5
Dude is pushing way past 80. Are we surprised?
5
RebootJobsMar 20, 2026
+8
*Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.*
8
dchusbandMar 20, 2026
+5
Hawaii was hit with a 75 year high in rainfall from the Kona last week. Chuck was just dehydrated and the hospital released him shortly thereafter.
5
Master-Client869Mar 20, 2026
+4
I heard Chuck Norris drove the ambulance to the hospital
4
HondachiMar 20, 2026
+10
Is the hospital okay?
10
InsuranceInner3040Mar 19, 2026
+29
Bill Brasky was the OG for the jokes and Chuck Norris was just a c**** ripoff. Also f*** Chuck Norris.
29
TheNonCredibleHulkMar 19, 2026
+5
Best damn salesman on the floor
5
VALO311Mar 19, 2026
+6
TO BILL BRASKY!!!
6
avjMar 19, 2026
+4
He hates Mexicans, but he's half-Mexican. _And_ he hates irony!
4
TorrenceMightingaleMar 19, 2026
+2
He’s got a toenail on the tip of his p****.
2
VinBarrKROMar 20, 2026
+2
I’m wearing a diaper!
2
First-Sheepherder640Mar 20, 2026
+2
His poop is considered currency in Argentina!
2
WhisperingStreamMar 19, 2026
+7
Old coot is still alive?
7
DickPinchMar 19, 2026
+8
Don't look up his opinions if you have good memories
8
BoppinzlewinskiMar 19, 2026
+6
Thoughts and prayers carlos
6
Less_TacosMar 19, 2026
+3
How is the hospital doing?
3
gorgonstairmasterMar 19, 2026
+33
Who cares? These jokes are about as fresh as the gif of the dancing baby.
33
JmazosoMar 19, 2026
+8
When Chuck Norris talks about Will Smiths wife, Will slaps himself
8
Individual_Cow7365Mar 19, 2026
+10
Chuck Norris doesn't get hospitalized. The hospital gets Chuck Norrisized
10
big-fig-waspMar 19, 2026
+9
“Walker says I have AIDS”
9
bolondeverdeMar 19, 2026
+36
Trumper lol good luck I guess
36
nbx909Mar 19, 2026
+18
Why is he in a hospital? He just needs some raw milk and ivermectin.
18
Wolv90Mar 19, 2026
+6
Or prayer. Save the godless medical stuff for those of us who trust science, he can have all the snake oil he'd love to sell.
6
ZorklisMar 19, 2026
+6
same as Hulk Hogan was. WAS lol
6
Morgan-ExplosionMar 19, 2026
+8
Chuck is doing fine, the island is in critical condition.
8
SaintNordMar 19, 2026
+3
The medical emergency went to the hospital first, then Chuck followed.
3
VirtualPercentage737Mar 20, 2026
+3
Heaven ain't tough enough.
3
Glass-Audience-1608Mar 20, 2026
+3
Chuck Norris doesnt die, he waits...
3
CrispyMannMar 20, 2026
+3
Hawaii was hospitalized because of Chick Norris
3
STMIHAMar 20, 2026
+3
Must have ran into another Chuck Norris.
3
Fodor04141987Mar 20, 2026
+3
I think they meant "a medical emergency had Chuck Norris"
3
skerdydo82Mar 20, 2026
+3
Came here for the jokes.
3
DragonHatNerfGunMar 20, 2026
+3
This has to be Ai , chuck Norris doesn't go to hospitals
3
I-am-not-a-celebrityMar 19, 2026
+14
I won't even make a joke about this bigot.
14
TexassupertrooperMar 19, 2026
+2
It probably wouldn’t be funny anyway
2
MayorofTromavilleMar 19, 2026
+19
I hate those stupid Chuck Norris jokes that have whitewashed who he really is. What a horrible man, only slightly better than Segal.
19
Im_from_the-futureMar 19, 2026
+42
The internet will have a hard time with this..
Wishing him all the best best in any case
42
[deleted]Mar 19, 2026
+122
[deleted]
122
Tacitus111Mar 19, 2026
+28
My first thought was “Did he try to karate chop an immigrant and broke a hip?”
28
MayorofTromavilleMar 19, 2026
+47
15 years ago he was claiming that if Obama won reelection, we'd be plunged in 1000 years of darkness.
Honestly, f*** him. He's always sucked. He was always one of the worst action stars with his Vietnam War apologia bullshit with Missing In Action.
47
lykathea2Mar 19, 2026
+13
Worst action star of that era by far. Even Seagal had the goofy trash talking. Norris was so dull and monotone.
13
bloodhound83Mar 19, 2026
+10
>15 years ago he was claiming that if Obama won reelection, we'd be plunged in 1000 years of darkness.
To be fair current times do feel quite dark.
Maybe that will be MAGAs endgame. Blaming Obama for getting Trump elected.
10
cozmckittyMar 19, 2026
+32
Yeah for real. I haven’t thought of him highly in years. He’s in the same vein as Clint Eastwood
32
MayorofTromavilleMar 19, 2026
+29
Clint Eastwood has always had more talent in his pinky than Chuck Norris has in his entire body, at least.
29
Ok_Vegetable_8031Mar 19, 2026
+16
Yeah, like Clint Eastwood is at least a great actor and a director who's done some great work. The problem with Norris is when you turn yourself into a human meme, losing likability hurts a lot more.
16
high_everyoneMar 19, 2026
+10
I know. He had a whole audience convinced there was someone sitting in a chair.
10
acrylix91Mar 19, 2026
+7
Man, sometimes news just completely misses me. This is the first I recall hearing about this
7
Ok_Builder_4225Mar 19, 2026
+32
When Obama was running, Chuck here said that his winning would bring a thousand years of darkness or some such. He's full on pyscho.
32
TrueKingSkyPiercerMar 19, 2026
+19
I mean he was technically correct, he just left out the intermediate steps. Obama’s election short circuited the minds of conservatives which led to trump’s election.
19
AsteroidMikeMar 19, 2026
+9
Hmmm, he might wanna look outside now and ask the same question.
9
Ok_Builder_4225Mar 19, 2026
+12
Trump is God to a lot of these people, so he'd probably say things are better now or some bullshit. Well, maybe not right now, given the reason for the post lol
12
oxide_jMar 19, 2026
+2
Same. Last I paid any attention to him he had a cameo in I think Expendables 2. Then he vouched for some MLM scheme Last Week Tonight was talking about and showed a commercial of him and his wife loving the product they were selling. Had no clue about the MAGA stuff until now, just thought he notably helped out veterans.
2
kraftdinnerwithsalsaMar 19, 2026
+9
He was a one trick pony, my mom had a hard on for him and she’s a bag
9
NedSchneebly-1138Mar 19, 2026
+2
The real question is… how many tricks can you do?
2
kraftdinnerwithsalsaMar 19, 2026
+5
_look what I can do_
Nehhha
[Video not included]
5
Recent_MirrorMar 19, 2026
+4
I wish the version of him that I idolized in all those Taekwondo magazines I read as a kid well
4
FilmNo15Mar 19, 2026
+2
He was never as good as Bill Wallace, Mike Stone, or Joe Lewis.
2
TBTakaTBTMar 19, 2026
+6
Walker told me I have AIDS.
6
avjMar 19, 2026
+4
Maybe the only thing of any entertainment value he's ever been involved in, and it wasn't even intentional.
https://youtu.be/ebOKo96HfEM
4
minnetonkacondoMar 19, 2026
+5
He's a strange breed of "traditional" conservative who profited from strange gigs and a weird meme culture that shaped around him somehow. Don't wish him ill, but I certainly won't feel bad if nature has taken its toll now. He's just some guy. And THIS is an unpopular opinion.
5
Illustrious-Egg5565Mar 19, 2026
+28
Chuck Norris doesn’t have medical emergencies. Medical emergencies have Chuck Norris
28
These-Barnacle-2417Mar 19, 2026
+5
Chuck Norris doesn't go to the hospital, the hospital comes to Chuck Norris.
5
Gamer0607Mar 19, 2026
+14
I hope the hospital recovers.
14
EverRichMar 19, 2026
+2
I hope the hospital pulls through…
2
multisubcultural1Mar 20, 2026
+2
Chuck Norris one rode the Pipeline from Oahu to Rhode Island.
2
MeandtheworldMar 20, 2026
+2
Are you sure this is the real Chuck Norris??
2
foreverperky99Mar 20, 2026
+2
He was hospitalized for wearing jeans in the sauna.
2
Fucky0uthatswhyMar 20, 2026
+2
I feel sorry for the hospital
2
Corporate-ScumMar 20, 2026
+2
I hope the hospital is ok
2
value_meal_papiMar 20, 2026
+2
Weird way to phrase Hawaii was hospitalized after chuck Norris landed there
2
Dry_Suspect_7429Mar 20, 2026
+2
If Chuck Norris has 5 dollars and you have 5 dollars Chuck Norris now has 10 dollars.
2
Cute-Sale3878Mar 20, 2026
+2
Heard he gave himself an appendectomy….While waiting for ER doctor.
2
ChaoticSeniorMar 19, 2026
+5
He had the douchebag removed, and there was nothing left.
5
seefourslamMar 19, 2026
+5
Why are people in here literally wanting this person to die?
You psychopaths
5
comfortably_nuumbMar 19, 2026
+4
Breaking News: Redditor shocked that some people aren't perfect. Film at eleven.
4
mr_mopeMar 19, 2026
+3
Chuck Norris jokes stopped being funny in 2012 during this exact ad run:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ud3pK5Wa90](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ud3pK5Wa90)
3
J0s3l1t0Mar 20, 2026
+3
Chuck is fine. The hospital tho...
3
TommyJohnSurgery420Mar 19, 2026
+6
I truthfully wish him the worst. He's a despicable human being.
6
MonkyKilnMonkyMar 19, 2026
+2
Only Chuck Norri's heart can take out Chuck Norris.
2
BeederdaMar 20, 2026
+2
*Hawaii had a medical emergency and chuck norris hospitalized it. The headline had a typo
2
BrewKazmaMar 19, 2026
+2
Screw him and his bible thumping nonsense.
2
SteakhouseRobMar 19, 2026
+3
What? Chuck Norris gave the hospital a medical emergency?
Hope the hospital is ok...
3
Confident-Pace4314Mar 19, 2026
+2
Pray for Hawaii
2
newssource12Mar 19, 2026
+2
Norris lost a brother in Vietnam, served himself, worked his ass off to become a champion and was an intense but good guy when I knew him. He certainly has earned the right to have and express an opinion.
185 Comments