okay so I am female 21 and come from a decent family like doing decent socially, financially and others aspects. in terms of looks I am avg or a a bit above avg and like 165 cm. The context is most of the times i feel empathy for people and genuinely try to be there for my people and dislike crimes and hypocrisy of people but sometimes it feels like something snaps in me and all the cover of nice person blow off and I want do or say most hurtful things but can't as i don't have that power and authority, that makes me wonder how I would have turn out as a person if I have that opportunity. Is this just me or you all feel sometimes like that too ? (P.s “I’m not very good at English, please excuse my grammar.”)
“I feel like that sometimes too, but I’m trying to understand it”
1
Traditional_Isopod80Mar 29, 2026
+1
Why?
1
The_Mountaineer_Mar 29, 2026
+2
I'm not always sure I'm a good person. All I know is I try to do better every day. And sometimes, that's just gotta be enough. But, there's a difference between being a good person and a nice/kind person, IMO. We all have the impulses to say and do things that may not be good, but that's just being human. I think we all wonder what mistress fate would have in store for us should we choose to always indulge those impulses without fail. Hope this helps!
2
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Yes i understand but this is just not about being the good person the thing is we are being a good person cause we want to or we have to because we don't hold the authority to act on our impulse.
1
imeheatherMar 29, 2026
+1
Yes, its the social contract, that keeps people in line, most people fall on a bell shaped curve, the outliers at either end are your paragons of good and your criminal sociopaths etc. Everyone else fits somewhere in the middle some more inclined to naturally conform or be leaders in society, others have to work a bit harder to meet the expectations. Some dance on the fringes
Each society is different with slightly different norms and expected behaviours. Your need to adhere to that changes too depending on such things like social economic status, race gender hierarchy etc.
You would probably enjoy studying psychology or philosophy. You seem interested in how you think and why you think like you do.
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
I really appreciate this. The way you put it actually made me feel more at ease,also yes i am interested in how human mind specially emotions works that a amazing topic isn't?
1
imeheatherMar 29, 2026
+1
It really is. I enjoy learning about how other people think and learn, how other societies do things. What makes people tick. We are all
So different but also tied together in our humanity. I hope you have a great day and that you get the chance to learn lots of cool stuff in your life.
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Thankyou you so much and I wish the same for you .
1
VenusBlue1111Mar 29, 2026
+1
Bad people dont worry about having the authority or power to act on that impulse, you allowing those things to stop you is what makes you good (or just scared/cowardly in some cases). Someone else wouldnt even ask the question theyd just go off, yes this is mostly people with the physical power to back it up but plety of people run the mouth of their worst selves whithout anything to back it up
1
Forward-Swimmer-8451Mar 29, 2026
+8
A good person chooses to be good and act on good. Doesn't mean their thoughts are wholesome all the time.
Bad people choose bad even knowing it's wrong.
8
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Makes sense.
1
somecowMar 29, 2026
+3
Not harmless, but fine until repeatedly provoked. Good? Absolutely.
3
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Maybe ,thanks .
1
consul500Mar 29, 2026
+1
As long as you haven't done anything with intent to cause harm, or hurt someone with malice on purpose, then I think you're a good person.
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Maybe you are right but the idea of good and bad is vast though.
1
No_Mountain4074Mar 29, 2026
+1
Be gentle on yourself. You are judging yourself on an imaginary basis of what you'd think you might do, hypothetically
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Thanks for sharing your pov .
1
SalaryNo8963Mar 29, 2026
+1
essa vontade de estourar não é uma experiência que todos sentem, mas entendo essa sensação de nem sempre ser uma boa pessoa, só que comigo é algo diferente. Gostei que você foi sincera, sem fazer questão de ser um exemplo nesse post
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Thankyou.
1
imeheatherMar 29, 2026
+1
There have been psychological studies like the prison guard studies where they gave people power over others and loosen the rules so that abuse of power is allowed or even encouraged. They found that many more people behaved in an abusive manner than expected. It appears to be a facet of human nature that when societal rules are relaxed that many people's behaviour slumps.
(My recollection of the study is loose as I read about it in university 20 odd years ago so I can't site the study for you sorry)
I think it's an important thought experiment to engage in for yourself and then knowing yourself well, make decisions for yourself to be the best person you can be. Your thoughts don't make you a good or bad person. It's your actions and impacts on the world. Every person can learn to be the best version of themselves.
1
Willing-Average-4798Mar 29, 2026
+1
Exactly like i have some rich friends and their decision making is so different than mine as i come from a Middle class background that no accountability attitude change a lot of things but yes you are right we should try to be better person as much as possible.
1
VenusBlue1111Mar 29, 2026
+1
I wonder if a prolonged version of this study would yeild different results, like telling a human that the societal rules that have bound them dont apply and then whatching them break those rules feels like a purge type scenario but given a long enough time line i bet they revert back to being semi decent people. Like the experiment where you fill a table half with sweets and with normal filling food and the kids imediently eat all the candy but over the whole day usually end up having a balaced diet
1
BackgroundEye0208Mar 29, 2026
+5
that’s actually pretty normal 😅
Like most people have those random “I could say the most hurtful thing right now” thoughts when they’re really annoyed or hurt. The difference is you *don’t* act on it.
And the fact you’re even worried about what kind of person you’d be with power? That already means you’re not that kind of person.
You’re just human. Nice people still get dark thoughts sometimes it doesn’t cancel out who you are.
24 Comments