"Under the amendment, parents will be able to decide whether to arrange for joint or sole custody of their children. In cases in which a divorce has been finalised and sole custody already granted, parents can petition a family court to change the agreement"
Whoa it's even retroactive
726
ConformistWithCauseApr 1, 2026
+81
That is really dope. Finally some good news
81
Mountain-Singer1764Apr 1, 2026
+32
It should be retroactive because circumstances can change.
32
b3iAAoLZOH9Y265cujFhApr 1, 2026
+118
Out of interest, what was the reasoning for not allowing joint custody before?
118
anirdnasApr 1, 2026
+202
Culture
202
Loud-Commercial9756Apr 1, 2026
+160
To expand on that answer for anyone curious, in Japanese culture husbands are strictly breadwinners and wives do all of the parenting. Of course there are many exceptions to this in reality, but the idea that men are "useless" as parents remains pervasive, especially among older people.
Automatic custody granted to the mother was just a no-brainer, coming at it from that angle. Unfortunately, that has led to children being in the custody of the abusive parent more than a few times.
To be fair, the idea that men are useless parents is far from a strange one in other cultures. In my province of Canada, for example, the female parent has to apply for child benefits because the law presumes they are the primary caregiver.
160
Sea-Present-8543Apr 1, 2026
+44
“Culture”
44
PM_MAJESTIC_PICSApr 1, 2026
+26
From the article— “joint arrangements could allow an abusive former spouse to exploit greater access to continue abusing their former partner or child.”
26
Acceptable-Pin2939Apr 1, 2026
+9
Hasn't this been solved for decades with you know custody proceedings.
9
splvtoonApr 1, 2026
+22
not exactly solved, there are absolutely still situations where parents are forced into shared custody for 'the best interest of the children’ even when one of them is physically abusive to the point of endangering their lives. but thats not a good reason to default to sole custody (neither by gender nor in general) either, it means the courts should look at individual cases to see whats best. so is it the best solution, absolutely, but certainly not a solved issue when it comes to the concern of abuse.
22
Acceptable-Pin2939Apr 1, 2026
+1
Yes, it's not a perfect solution but to say that they don't allow negotiated custody because of this one edge case is madness.
1
splvtoonApr 1, 2026
+1
agreed! thats why i mentioned in my comment that it doesnt justify not allowing joint custody. i just think its important to not paint it out to be a solved issue either. people continue to lose their lives over courts caring more about perceived fairness than the safety of the children or abused parent and the justice system in a lot of countries needs to do better when it comes to looking at individual cases, specifically ones with known documented abuse, rather than what a guideline says is in everyones best interest.
1
MN_Yogi1988Apr 1, 2026
+2
I don’t know why they don’t decide it with a duel in a children’s card game
2
cqmApr 1, 2026
+3
More like what changed, which is Japan’s prime minister wanting to make child rearing more attractive since their birth rate is through the floor
This is one of several reforms
3
Spaghett_EnjoyerApr 1, 2026
+243
Wow, I'm actually happy for them and this progress, this is amazing
243
Cyclone050Apr 1, 2026
+207
There are some cultural traditions that just need to be quietly set aside.
207
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+302
Please Korea. I want to see my daughter. She's 13. I havent seen her in more than a year. I live less than 15 km away. . The laws are archaic and totally against foreigners.Been to court and they just throw me out. Non citizen here. Vancouver origin. I keep fighting to see her. Won't stop.i want to see my girl and she wants to see me.
302
kargyleApr 1, 2026
+118
A close friend of mine is going through this with his daughter in Taiwan. The xenophobic treatment of western parents by the courts is gross and appalling. He had to spend a lot of money (that he doesn’t really have) on lawyers to get his daughter out of the house of her maternal grandfather who was viciously beating her.
Anyway, I feel for you. Good luck, dad.
118
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+4
Thanks. I continue . It's hard. I look forward to the day I can see my girl.
4
Throwaway1996mApr 1, 2026
+20
Best of luck to you, that must be an incredibly painful situation to be in
20
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+3
Thanks , it is hard. I keep going. Every day makes me stronger. And I was strong before . We keep on going.
3
[deleted]Apr 1, 2026
-9
[deleted]
-9
TheBobDoleExperienceApr 1, 2026
+44
Or they're just venting frustration and don't expect anyone important enough in Korea to actually read this? Don't know OP, but I would assume listnook wasn't their first recourse. Let people be people my dude.
44
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+11
I have a plan. It's not about venting here.thanks for asking though
11
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+9
It doesn't matter. I'm in court now in Korea
9
HualaydaApr 1, 2026
-18
I dont understand why anyone would be so stupid to not consider the local laws and make children abroad. People break up or divorce on bad terms soooooooooooooo often how can you be so delusional and think it cant happen to you?
I keep seeing a woman on Tiktok who is stuck in China for probably the next 18 years because her abusive ex husband who has nothing to do with the baby prevents her from leaving the country to to back to her family. Not even for visiting.
Its like signing away your rights to freedom. And in your case as the father its even worse. The deal is so shitty who voluntarily does that????
I kept trying to convince my friend not to move to Dubai for her boyfriend. Now she is there and married and once she is pregnant her life will literally depend on his mood. In shiny shit hole surrounded by non shiny shit holes.
Love is not worth this. Not even close.
-18
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+11
I live here 25 years
11
HualaydaApr 1, 2026
-15
Okay? And you reproduced in a country where you new that with an almost 1/3 - 1/2 chance of divorce that the mother will have all the rights to the kids? What was the point of your comment? Its still your fault for making dumb choices.
-15
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+10
I reproduce in Vancouver , my home. What's your point?
10
[deleted]Apr 1, 2026
-8
[removed]
-8
goosechaserApr 1, 2026
+3
Jesus you’re miserable. Your argument is ludicrously reductive, people have kids in all different kinds of places for different reasons. Any international relationship will involve having kids in a jurisdiction in which one of the partners is foreign. It does not follow that one parent in every international marriage is dumb.
3
HualaydaApr 1, 2026
+1
It absolutely does. Not marriage itself but having children. Your biggest weakness in life will be your children so you should always take the lowest risk. They can ofc still choose to be delusional but they should at least stop crying about it when they get fucked over and take the loss they are responsible for.
If you want children you shouldnt date foreigners who live in another country. Its so easy to avoid.
1
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
+1
You are a true idiot
1
Jinm409Apr 1, 2026
+16
YAY! Go Japan! You’ll make it into the 19th century yet! After that it’s the 20th, and then the 21st where the rest of us reside! WOOHOO!
16
SedesBakelitowyApr 1, 2026
+16
It's certainly incredible news but hearing that it wasn't even a possibility up until the current year just fills me with dread and dejection
16
ThlnBillyBoyApr 1, 2026
+3
A bit off topic, but I was very confused about Matt and TK's situation from Digimon, when I was a kid, because even though their parents divorced I couldn't understand why they hadn't see each other much in between and why Matt was such a stranger towards his mum.
3
LMONDEGREENApr 1, 2026
+58
I know so many fathers who had their children kidnapped by their Japanese spouses.
This is going to be great news for them. Bad news for the spouses who will definitely claim the father is "abusive" to deny them custody. Since they are Japanese and father is foreigner, it's their word against foreigners.
58
scarywomApr 1, 2026
-66
> I know so many fathers
yeah right.
Maybe you have heard of such situations.
-66
theblakesheepApr 1, 2026
+14
Go back to your parents.
14
Logically_InsaneApr 1, 2026
+5
What kind of life leads a person to know “so many” dads who lost their kids to Japanese moms? Just seems statistically unlikely.
Maybe he was stationed at a US base there, or joined a Japanese dating service?
5
ArtemysticaApr 1, 2026
+4
Living in Japan for a while, you’re bound to know a handful— I’m coming up on four years and I can count as many people I know personally who lost custody to Japanese spouses— but there’s a lot of posts about this on the various resident sublistnooks.
Also not military or used a dating service, just working a white collar job at an international company.
4
Vermaji_jodApr 1, 2026
+1
divorce rate is 50 percent lets say those with children form 20 percent part in that of that every single one of those father was in this situation
1
prazulsaltaretApr 1, 2026
+26
They didn t have this before? The f***? In 2026, until now, the woman just won by default?
26
anirdnasApr 1, 2026
+87
The japanese parent who took/kidnapped kids first. It can be mother or father.
87
WideOperation6632Apr 1, 2026
-1
This is what she did
-1
melankoholistiApr 1, 2026
-14
You are replying into a totally different thread. Hopefully Japan will take over Korea again, so your situation can be resolved.
48 Comments