Hi people,
I was in a 5 year relationship with someone, it was very intense, filled with love and not growing tired of each other. But we belonged to different religions and communities. There was always this thought in the back of our minds that how will this work out? how will our parents agree....slowly i start to realise that my parents won't and i communicated that in 2024. I didn't have to courage to fight as my parents, My mom especially would put up an act and threaten to do something, and I was really young too, It wasn't my age for marriage or even thinking about that. I wanted to focus on building my career. But I was very committed to this guy!
In 2025 he left the country to live in the country where his parents live...and since we both knew that the future is hazy, (and i had plans to study abroad too, so i got focused on that) so we just slowly started realising it more and more.
Later he said in dec end this year, that do we have a future or not?, can you talk to your mom or not? ( At that time, i just came out of tough family situation too, dad's health wasn't good, i was depressed, we had an education loan running and my job was toxic too)...so i got scared and told that what if my dad and mom react very harshly? what if they threaten to do something? Lock me up? or just take a wrong step...so i said No (due to being scared)
Then he later confessed to me that his parents have been looking for matches, pressurizing him and he has been talking to someone for 2.5 months now and he likes her. I got shocked!! I couldn't believe it.
For days, i kept thinking how could he, I was trying to process our breakup and him liking a new person. He called her pretty, said that they clicked.
We agreed to stay together to complete our anniversary to give ourselves a good farewell(It was just a few days away).
He came to meet me for 2 days and then he went to meet her too.
Even before meeting her, he said i would wait for you.
Even after meeting her, he said i would wait for you but the more i think about parents the tougher it is.
He even said I still love you.
Around a month back, after hearing things like he would wait for me, I got Courage! I said, I am ready to speak with my parents and I wanna give this a SHOT! he said the ship has sailed, I have told my mom that i am speaking to someone and i am in the process of moving on now!
But this guy only led me on. We had this convo in Feb 25th or something
And even Just 15 days back he said he still has feelings!
But he is choosing her, I feel he is choosing her cause he knows its easier with her. If he ends with her and comes back to me, the guarantee that my parents will agree is Less, very less! Its a gamble!
He is choosing her, she is scrutinizing his social media and asking him who is each person in his profile. (he told me all this, i did not ask)
He is trying to show that he is a committed man!
**I wish for a 2nd chance with him.** I genuinely feel he kept a backup ready, so that if I say no, he can go with her. I just wanted time to reflect?
I am young, not even 25! I was in career building mindset and last year took a very bad emotional toll on me!
I just wanted him to wait and give us some time...so that I would have build up my courage against my toxic parents!
Idk what to do, I really want a 2nd Chance!
**Don't tell me I had my chance and i missed it. The guy kept a backup ready and it felt like he put a knife to my heart! He could've just given me a month and I would have made up my mind.**
I miss my guy. And I wanna turn things back!
Moreover, I feel so weird, how can he just move on like that and like someone else and act as if our 5 years meant nothing and its easy to go by the day?
Is she a rebound? They started talking in oct, me in Jan end and now are together.
She seems like a woman with a lot of trust issues.
**I feel very hurt by all this. Don't tell me forget and get a life, stop focusing on their relationship etc! I am not focusing on them. I would just want a 2nd chance....but idk how men behave. Idk if he is over me, or why is still there?**
**It hurts and I need advice, I do not want people to be mean.**
Thanks