ListNook

Less-Passenger8007 Apr 3, 2026 +749

Imagine having an arbitrary disagreement with your boss and it resulting in your military conscritpion.

749

RarelyReadReplies Apr 3, 2026 +259

Not even just military conscription, military conscription into a war for a country that treats its soldiers like cannon fodder. It's historically always been that way for Russia. Putin certainly didn't break the mould there.

259

Zem_42 Apr 3, 2026 +71

True. It’s closer to a death penalty than conscription

71

DataDrivenDoc Apr 3, 2026 +1

And when its not and that guy gets to go back home...man I have a feeling this could lead to a lot of middle management revenge killings later

1

Teyar Apr 3, 2026 +1

And that's WHY 99% of them won't be coming back.

1

throwawaymeow12321 Apr 3, 2026 +1

It is. It's basically a signed death certificate

1

ArmoredGoat Apr 3, 2026 +56

Imagine on paper you are doing well but secretly someone dont see you in the right angle and “promote” you ….

56

magicaltrevor953 Apr 3, 2026 +27

Congratulations comrade, ~~die~~ due to your hard work this year you are being promoted to infantry.

27

NichtOhneMeineKamera Apr 3, 2026 +11

Unfortunate spelling error spotted...

11

InquisitiveLemon Apr 3, 2026 +1

Well their hard work would very likely die alright :x

1

solapelsin Apr 3, 2026 +1

\> die to your hard work this year Ironically correct typo

1

abhijitd Apr 3, 2026 +8

Reminds me of the movie "Paths of Glory" where something similar happens.

8

rbhmmx Apr 3, 2026 +12

Yea I cant imaginen as a boss that I would send my best people away

12

eggyal Apr 3, 2026 +1

Indeed. This is the way for the army to get the very worst people, which is hardly going to help their war effort.

1

Abslalom Apr 3, 2026 +1

Imagine surviving the war. Your ex-boss might receive a surprise visit.

1

Amathyst7564 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Or working with your wife and your boss sends you to the meat grinder because he thinks it might put her back on the dating market.

1

Pebble-Sorter-8128 Apr 3, 2026 +1

And in your almost certain death.

1

LovelyDayHere Apr 3, 2026 +226

3 day special military operation going well

226

Illustrious-Syrup509 Apr 3, 2026 +33

Russia is in free fall.

33

Inevitable_Butthole Apr 3, 2026 +22

Don't worry trump will help with that

22

freakofnature555 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Let’s hope he is as successful as with Iran

1

Kraand Apr 3, 2026 +1

Leaving NATO he will have thousands of soldiers to be relocated. Somewhere...

1

memberino Apr 3, 2026 +514

Work for half your salary or see the frontline.

514

XsancoX Apr 3, 2026 +172

Half the salary it is Boss

172

Beatrenger Apr 3, 2026 +59

I'll add extra time Boss. No need to pay extra

59

versello Apr 3, 2026 +16

I’ll work for free Boss. No need to pay at all.

16

Hungry-ThoughtsCurry Apr 3, 2026 +10

To the front you go

10

PabloZissou Apr 3, 2026 +8

Ok, Vladim, we will check again on next year review!

8

greatthebob38 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Boss: let me sleep with your wife or you sleep on the frontlines.

1

dennis-w220 Apr 3, 2026 +11

Half? how about work for free? you get a bag of bread to feed.

11

Zem_42 Apr 3, 2026 +5

And most likely it’s not a long term assignment

5

LovelyDayHere Apr 3, 2026 +1

Look at me, I am boss now

1

_Figaro Apr 3, 2026 +79

"Performance review" just took on a whole new meaning

79

Several_Ant_9867 Apr 3, 2026 +7

Well, everything in Russia is more dangerous, think about their r*******

7

uselessandexpensive Apr 3, 2026 +69

The first instinct might be that everyone will work hard to be valuable to their employer, but knowing how things work in the real world, this will result in severe instances of claiming others' work, throwing people under the bus, and retaliation in general. This is going to be so bad for the Russian economy and morale. Workplaces will become incredibly cutthroat and corrupt instead of cooperative and rewarding. It used to be a dark (likely true) joke that if Russians misbehaved they would get sent to the gulag. Now instead of firing people, employers can send them to die.

69

Feligris Apr 3, 2026 +29

>The first instinct might be that everyone will work hard to be valuable to their employer, but knowing how things work in the real world, this will result in severe instances of claiming others' work, throwing people under the bus, and retaliation in general. History continues to rhyme since in the '80s General Electric's CEO at the time, Jack Welch, came up with the [Vitality Curve/Stack Ranking management method](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vitality_curve) where the idea is to use metrics to identify the "bottom 10% of employees" and fire them regularly in order prompt everyone to do their best, with his theory being that this would be a great way to improve a company by ridding it of non-productive "deadwood" and maintain a constant high level of worker performance. Of course in reality this infamously turned out exactly the way you described, since forcing employees to constantly compete against each other like this caused them to figure out that shutting down all cooperation and outright trash talking or sabotaging their co-workers instead was a better idea since it's (much) easier to drag everyone else down than try and get ahead of them when dealing with arbitrary metrics, with further complications being caused by managers being forced to keep firing perceived "low performers" from tightly knit well-functioning departments which destroyed their performance.

29

uselessandexpensive Apr 3, 2026 +1

I didn't know about that case. Thank you for sharing!

1

project23 Apr 3, 2026 +14

But isn't this how it was done in Soviet days? Eat the weak and never tell the truth?

14

UbiSububi8 Apr 3, 2026 +4

I think it’ll be bosses saying “give me 20% of your pay, or I send you to the war”

4

uselessandexpensive Apr 3, 2026 +1

Or any of the other ways bosses abuse power. If women were at risk of getting sent away, sexual harassment and coercion would skyrocket.

1

sittingshotgun Apr 3, 2026 +6

That nice guy with the hot wife is fucked.

6

Darude78 Apr 3, 2026 +1

You just summed up Russia before this war.

1

AIFocusedAcc Apr 3, 2026 +154

this will make everyone resign haha.

154

Skane1982 Apr 3, 2026 +138

Forced conscription on all unemployed. /s

138

devi83 Apr 3, 2026 +110

I think you can remove the /s

110

SkintCrayon Apr 3, 2026 +12

It's an effective move to reduce unemployment

12

Ambitious-Wind9838 Apr 3, 2026 +30

Today it's sarcasm, tomorrow it's the law.

30

speedstares Apr 3, 2026 +1

Well if you are unemployed then you have enough time to go to war.

1

redkinoko Apr 3, 2026 +25

Russian companies require a 2 weeks notice. Guess what's faster than 2 weeks.

25

M4rkusD Apr 3, 2026 +29

1 week?

29

AlGoreBestGore Apr 3, 2026 +16

Big if true.

16

mpgd Apr 3, 2026 +3

I'm counting on that. There's enough time for work related accident, that would potentially make one avoid going to war.

3

WastingMyLifeToday Apr 3, 2026 +4

They've sent people into the front lines on crushes, sometimes missing half a leg. You gotta be creative to have enough injuries.

4

mpgd Apr 3, 2026 +3

That is insane.

3

RudyKnots Apr 3, 2026 +2

2wks

2

bricoXL Apr 3, 2026 +2

3 days also, as in special military operations.

2

tube_ears Apr 3, 2026 +2

1 strongk

2

omnibossk Apr 3, 2026 +1

No, underbid each other in salary to stay at the job. Unemployed are sent straight to the meatgrinder

1

Lillian_Crocodilian Apr 3, 2026 +114

The guy who steals everyone's lunch from the breakroom fridge is very worried right now.

114

RarelyReadReplies Apr 3, 2026 +40

I never understood someone doing this... Then the excuse is "I didn't see a name on it". I just don't get that excuse at all. Nobody from work just happened to pack an extra lunch for any hungry coworkers.

40

RudyKnots Apr 3, 2026 +31

I’ve never *actually* seen this happen though. Like, I’ve heard of it happening, I’ve just never actually heard of it happening to or by anyone I know directly. It sounds very much like one of those things that we tend to get angry over because we can easily imagine a****** like this, even though I’ve never actually seen proof they exist.

31

Thefdt Apr 3, 2026 +9

Milk thieves are common at my work. I think I’ve had one piece of food stolen in like 14 years. And I think it was done by a coworker who’s definitely on the spectrum

9

Constant-Ad-7490 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Right? We have the opposite problem. There's a lunch in the fridge no one has eaten in weeks....and we're all too polite to throw it away because that's not our Tupperware, the owner might want it back!

1

MagicSPA Apr 3, 2026 +1

They exist. I had a sandwich stolen from the fridge at my workplace. I actually brought in two that day, so I didn't go hungry, but it was no thanks to the thief. What makes it worse is, the person couldn't have been starving. The theft took place on payday. Their salary was sitting in their account, and they decided to steal food from others anyway.

1

ScrotumScrapings Apr 3, 2026 +13

Isn’t everyone in russia that guy?

13

KetracelYellow Apr 3, 2026 +6

They have fridges?

6

YellowBook Apr 3, 2026 +10

Whole country is a fridge

10

spamattacker Apr 3, 2026 +2

Only if the boss hasn't been conned by that guy's insincere, smiling, suck-up-face

2

groceriesN1trip Apr 3, 2026 +1

Because there will be less lunches to steal

1

Fair-Hair2080 Apr 3, 2026 +15

Is life really worth living at that point? I’d do it on my terms.

15

sporkparty Apr 3, 2026 +9

Then you wouldn’t be surprised to know many Russian soldiers are doing exactly that.

9

RarelyReadReplies Apr 3, 2026 +11

They could always defect to Ukraine, or maybe take down their evil piece of shit commander that wants to send them into the meat grinder.

11

delinquentfatcat Apr 3, 2026 +8

Defecting means Ukraine wants them. It's more like surrendering, which spares their life (if successfully done without dying), but then they get eventually traded back to Russia.

8

Seeteuf3l Apr 3, 2026 +1

Ukraine might treat their POWs better than Russians treat their own troops. However there is a risk that if they hand you back in prisoner exchange, you'll be labeled as a traitor and sent back to the front in a penal battalion

1

delinquentfatcat Apr 3, 2026 +1

It's a vicious cycle. They say that even when a Russian dies, for his past misdeeds he gets reincarnated back to Russia.

1

Yvaelle Apr 3, 2026 +1

Any man who survived to adulthood in Russia without the nepotism to avoid such a fate, already has an incredible tolerance for suffering.

1

thatasianguy88 Apr 3, 2026 +15

Their economy is cooked

15

KeijiVBoi Apr 3, 2026 +16

Dying for some old coward p**** prick

16

zuulbe Apr 3, 2026 +9

HR please provide me a list of workers with most sick days.

9

PetRockSematary Apr 3, 2026 +8

If you're a bigger person do you get to name more names?

8

Moomoomilkpapi Apr 3, 2026 +10

Everyone in Russia is about to start joining the company Football teams and participating in the weekly bowling nights to not be the least likeable coworker 😂😂😂.

10

The_Frostweaver Apr 3, 2026 +5

If I ran a company in Russia I'd advertise some positions, hire the first people to apply and give their names to Putin. If I was a worker I'd be trying to flee the country, I'd be demanding to work illegally (I'd give my employer a fake name and get paid in cash). No one wants to be drafted and if working legally increases your risk of being drafted then potential tax paying workers will find workarounds. I know Putin still has money and bodies to feed into his meat grinder of a war but this type of action reaks of desperation and has negative long term consequences.

5

zepplinc20 Apr 3, 2026 +4

That's one way to increase productivity

4

Phylanara Apr 3, 2026 +3

I've been hearing a general news channel reporting that Ukraine is regaining net territory for the first time today. Things are looking up.

3

raerae1991 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Wow…that sucks! Who would want to work if that was the case!

1

enp_redd Apr 3, 2026 +1

giving out certain death sentences to colleagues is ...oughhh...

1

PositiveUse Apr 3, 2026 +1

Man this is dystopian … I‘m not judging anyone who‘s now trying to pack and flee

1

yankdevil Apr 3, 2026 +1

Keep voting for far right politicians and this can come to your country too!

1

Crashtest_Fetus Apr 3, 2026 +1

The name HR was never so fitting

1

Notimeforthat1 Apr 3, 2026 +9

Astonishing they're not mass protesting. Things must still be good.

9

sporkparty Apr 3, 2026 +11

They’ve been beaten into submission by decades of watching people be gulagged for protesting with blank sheets of paper.

11

RarelyReadReplies Apr 3, 2026 +14

They're afraid. The Russian government would squash any uprising pretty quick I'd imagine.

14

MeringuePls Apr 3, 2026 +1

The people have been completely and utterly dominated in every way possible. It's practice in that hellhole to stifle the growth of ones spirit starting from birth, and the result is millions of easily pliable zombies, instead of normal civilians. What ever "good" russians that once existed, have all been killed, imprisoned or have fled. Whats left are automatons with no regard for their life, comfort, happiness or anything. Only thing that matters is serving the motherland and their living god putin.

1

PeksyTiger Apr 3, 2026 +1

Going full medieval vassal

1

prickleynomad Apr 3, 2026 +1

This will work well, companies cannot pay the staff they have so Putin has a solution.

1

toofine Apr 3, 2026 +1

This will be great for the economy. What little know-how they have been able to scrape together under that mob government will evaporate on the frontlines. Does Putin just permanently live in a bunker or what? How is this guy even alive.

1

vessel_for_the_soul Apr 3, 2026 +1

Survivor TV was work place training. I'd rather be in the field than with office.

1

RobottoRisotto Apr 3, 2026 +1

“So, Dimitri, you’re manning the grill today, Vladimir is on side orders and Yuri is going to the front lines. Bye Yuri!”

1

ruat_caelum Apr 3, 2026 +1

I'd be sending emails nominating the c-suite people.

1

HopiumInhaler Apr 3, 2026 +4

Why don’t they just draft 1 Million people and take all of Ukraine? Are they stupid?

4

Cyzax007 Apr 3, 2026 +4

A draft would be blamed on Putin... This will be blamed on the companies...

4

sporkparty Apr 3, 2026 +4

Got Tsar bad boyars. Just like how it’s bondis fault that the eppstien files have been botched.

4

ocombe Apr 3, 2026 +1

because you think you can just send 1 million people with no food chain, no munitions, no weapons and it will make a difference ? They already struggle with their supply chain for the soldiers they have

1

Uncleniles Apr 3, 2026 +3

Russia is ordering it's private sector to sacrifice their most useless employees to the war. They are not only desperate for manpower, they are also scraping the bottom of the barrel.

3

DaveVdE Apr 3, 2026 +2

In Flemish we call them Chinese volunteers (chinese vrijwilligers).

2

BandOfBroskis Apr 3, 2026 +2

Really seems like the machine is about to collapse. We’ll see

2

sisterlain Apr 3, 2026 +1

ukraine been conscripting people since the war started, and they still going strong. russia is only just planning to start doing that and somehow its the end for them

1

OMGWTFBBQBRT Apr 3, 2026 +1

Hunger Games 2026!

1

Comprehensive-Gas832 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Sudden surge in productivity...

1

I_can_vouch_for_that Apr 3, 2026 +1

They're going to be such an imbalanced of men. Dane6 with Ukraine.

1

Starkiller_303 Apr 3, 2026 +1

That PIP just came with a much larger consequence.

1

A_Dehydrated_Walrus Apr 3, 2026 +1

The fear of conscription will breed indentured servitude of the populace. Suppress decent. Do not pass "Go". Do not go to jail. Do not collect 20,000 rubles. Go straight to Donetsk. Do not get a funeral. Slava Ukrainii. Edit: I also feel empathy for the Russians who are dying for Vladimir Putin's ego. Waste of a generation.

1

strat_rocker Apr 3, 2026 +1

this pathological evil country will be the death of this world

1

whykickamoocow9 Apr 3, 2026 +1

I’d just get on a train and leave the country.. then call international to resign or email it..

1

Imperial-Green Apr 3, 2026 +1

There was a segment in SR (Swedish Radio) yesterday about a Russian university teacher who were calling her male students unmanly and cowards if they didn’t join the army as drone pilots. It’s was explained that she is under enormous pressure to meet her quota.

1

seepcell Apr 3, 2026 +1

There's an obvious problem with the soldiers, maybe this will bring the war closer to an end

1

Niiai Apr 3, 2026 +1

They are ordering them to choose 2 to 5 who die.

1

work4food Apr 3, 2026 +1

The most credible source for all things russian.

1

Adam_Neverwas Apr 3, 2026 +1

I can believe anything about Russia.

1

neptunereach Apr 3, 2026 +1

Purification (or purge…)

1

Frequent-Werewolf828 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Quit or die??? Clever move vlad

1

Medium-Recording7780 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Always wanted to have a way to get rid of that effin Larry .

1

Snoutoffish Apr 3, 2026 +1

Microwave fish in the company lunch room? Off to the front!

1

Pete-MJL Apr 3, 2026 +1

We can only hope things like this trigger mutiny and massive strikes...

1

Ellixhirion Apr 3, 2026 +1

Who needs an economy when there is nobody left…

1

realise2056 Apr 3, 2026 +1

Good! Why not send them all to the meat grinder? In 5 years there will be no more Russia there will be a country called Greater Ukraine.

1

scraz Apr 3, 2026 +1

Boss: Hey Alexei i want to f*** your wife and daughter in the ass. Have them at my house by 6 and bring some Stolichnaya or your going to the front.

1

MeduseYahoo Apr 3, 2026

Source non fiable. Donnez une autre source s'il vous plaît. Le ministre russe de la défense aurait dû faire cette annonce si elle était réel. A quoi cela sert-il de raconter ce genre de mensonges ? Pensent-ils gagner la guerre en écrivant ce genre de chose dans un salon de thé ?

0

OverallHearing5 Apr 3, 2026

Seems like Russia wants to get rid of their least productive, most hated, socially unacceptable, poorest, and most easily manipulated people. Is it any coincidence the whole globe is slowly going to war? I fear they’re trying to get rid of as many non wealthies as possible.

0

Jolly_Psychology_506 Apr 3, 2026

The UK equivalent would have Brent send Gareth and Keith! Lol

0

EgorLabrador Apr 3, 2026 +1

Well, most of russians are supporting war, so I guess its kinda good news for them right? I guess they can fulfill their dreams and kill those "ukranian nazis"

1

donkbeast Apr 3, 2026 -7

Pretty pathetic when the worldnews propaganda network can barely push this story with their thousands of bots.

-7

AspectScary Apr 3, 2026 -2

The story is f****** absurd too

-2

Russia is ordering companies to nominate employees for military service — 2 to 5 names depending on size

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