**Russia has threatened a nuclear strike (or "retaliation the likes of which the world has never seen") in the following situations:**
* **Finland and Sweden joining NATO.**
* **Deliveries of Leopard and Abrams tanks to Ukraine.**
* **Deliveries of F-16 fighter jets to Ukraine.**
* **The use of Western missiles (ATACMS, Storm Shadow) against targets within Russia.**
* **Drone attacks on Russian refineries or European drone factories.**
1522
tvtowers2 days ago
+556
Bingo. They shriek like scalded imbeciles over every insult, threat or thing they find mildly distasteful. Real or imagined.
556
Aware-Code72442 days ago
+69
And we have a w*****.
69
Careless-Vehicle-2861 day ago
+39
America is going to be exactly like that very soon. I know it's already happening but it's going to be far more deafening as time goes forward. Every little thing will get trump or his successor to threaten nuclear strikes.
We're entering a world of three massive bullies fighting over the rest of us exactly like the world of 1984.
39
FjorgVanDerPlorg1 day ago
+13
The thing is as it happens the threat they pose will diminish. The Iran war has barely started and the US is already burning through its reserves of missiles at an unsustainable rate. Grift within US military budgets is at "Russia hold my beer" levels, Trump still plans his "Golden Dome" project, which is widely regarded as an expensive boondoggle.
You wouldn't think so looking at them now, but for a minute Russia actually was considered a threat to the US. US did have the tech edge, but a lot of Russian military hardware was respected in the west. Putin systematically white-anted that out of existence, the "Sistema" Putin put in place now permeates every part of Russian society and though it's institutionalization of patronage and corruption all the way down, means nothing of merit or value gets done.
This is why the latest generation of Russian ICBM has failed 5 of it's 6 tests. It's why Russian tank "Reactive Armor" turned out to be egg cartons taped together a painted to look like armor. It's why when the Ukraine war started, a lot of the invading vehicles ran out of petrol, because the soldiers sold it.
Late stage authoritarianism like Russia is just rot and the US is speedrunning it faster than Putin did.
This trend also means that China is pretty much a deep water navy away from being the new dominant world superpower, all while a sundowning Trump drags the country down with him.
Xi should send Trump a gift basket or something.
13
Koala_eiO1 day ago
+4
> America is going to be exactly like that very soon.
It has been like that for a year and a half, my good sir. 79 years old Trump threatens more than Kim Jong-Un. We just need to stop relaying his every word in the news.
4
CthulhusEvilTwin1 day ago
+22
They don't want us to find out their missiles are just filled with parts from pinball machines
22
tvtowers1 day ago
+11
When their guidance systems were failing a couple of years ago I joked that they were using chips from Tickle Me Elmo dolls.
11
AlanJohnson841 day ago
+3
Doc Brown strikes again!
3
Winnipeg-Bear2 days ago
+156
Problem with Russia is that it only has one real threat, which is a nuclear strike. If it ever uses one, then it will end in its own destruction (along with half the planet). Russia can bark all it wants, but it knows that it will never use a nuke.
156
cleanbear2 days ago
+157
The russian elite hides their kids in european towns. Pretty sure they are not going to kull their own and destroy the properties yhey own
157
JohnGabin2 days ago
+79
Putin’s daughter lives her best life in Paris…
79
HumaDracobane2 days ago
+20
In fact, that is a partial warning system; if they ove all of them our of Europe you know something will happen.
Why partial, you might ask? Because considering how they are I bet more than one of them is whiling to sacrifice their children like they're whiling to sacrifice any other children.
20
Matchbreakers2 days ago
+15
They sacrifice themselves as well. Even if they survive the return nukes their power and control will be gone.
One cannot win a nuclear war, only lose it.
15
Fun_Scheme90882 days ago
+5
My fear is that one of these egomaniacs will have no qualms with f****** the world when they're on their way out. Nothing backs you into a corner like terminal cancer
5
cleanbear1 day ago
+7
Hopefully theres a dude or dudette somewhere in the chain with a will to live
7
beekersavant2 days ago
+16
Well, until they showed the world that their military was well-below average by failing to annex Ukraine and then getting absolutely torn up by a much smaller (but determined and heroic) force, they used to threaten people with the rest of their military. But now, it’s pretty obvious that if they do anything but hold the line in Ukraine, Moscow will have real issues with an invading force.
16
[deleted]2 days ago
+9
[deleted]
9
BigBananaBerries2 days ago
+7
The problem is that not many would need to be successful to be wildly devastating. How many thousands to they claim to have? Could their overwhelming corruption have nullified that threat completely? It's tough to say & they've played on this fear of world leaders for years with the rest of their arsenal looking like a pretty decent supporting act.
*Their* problem is that nobody believes their lies any more.
7
Ferelwing1 day ago
+3
Yes, well the problem with nukes is they don't care about national boundaries. If Russia uses them, they will never get to use another. It would unite enough to come in and make certain that there are none that can fire ever again. Height, payload and wind patterns would determine the worst of it and considering every country they're threatening has the ability to absolutely target them *before* they reach their targets it's much more likely that they end up killing themselves rather than those they intended to kill. This isn't to say that the nuclear fall-out wouldn't be a problem, it would but the most likely outcome is they end themselves and any chance of Russia rising again.
3
FrostyAd77081 day ago
+2
Also they only cares about two cities, Moscow and St Petersburg. Easy targets for retaliation
2
amkronos2 days ago
+79
Once you visualize Russia as an overweight aging Karen, so much makes sense.
79
Aethernath2 days ago
+18
And you’ve forgotten many more, as the list is very very long.
18
Ivanow1 day ago
+14
[China's final warning](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/China%27s_final_warning)
"China's final warning" (последнее китайское предупреждение) is a Russian ironic idiom originating from the Soviet Union that refers to a warning that carries no real consequences.
14
noir_lord2 days ago
+10
They've threatened the UK so much we could almost set our watches by it.
10
Hirork2 days ago
+8
It's safe to say on any day ending with a Y; the Russian Federation has threatened nuclear action.
8
onlyforthisjob2 days ago
+8
Meanwhile in the USA, some guy surely had to be talked out of using those sweet nuclear codes...
8
Left-Night-11252 days ago
+5
They probably handed him a paper with fake codes.
5
Karli_Chirk1 day ago
+2
They told him its 6-7
2
Mysterious_Past62771 day ago
+2
You forgot one, if Germany farts in the wrong direction.
2
YourFavoriteKraut1 day ago
+3
To quite a guy on the internet in 2022:
"So what you are saying is that you want us, the Germans, to rapidly arm to the teeth and start going east? Are you absolutely sure? I'm just asking because the last two times we did that, y'all got mad."
3
canspop2 days ago
+3
>"retaliation the likes of which the world has never seen"
Are we sure it was ruZZia? It sounds more like a trump comment.
Then again, birds of a feather...
3
Thick-Phrase46922 days ago
+3
You're right, those are Taccos words, however, here is the original, including the authors.
putin in 2018
As a citizen of Russia and the head of the Russian state, I must ask myself: Why would we need a world if there is no Russia in it?
medvedev in 2022
Should anything like that happen, 'Judgement Day' will come for them all at once — very fast and very tough. It will be very difficult to hide.
3
BigBananaBerries1 day ago
+4
Because of course, Medvedev gets wheeled out for the nuclear stuff again
4
Ferelwing1 day ago
+4
Don't forget Lavrov, he's another big proponent of threatening nukes.
4
BigBananaBerries1 day ago
+2
That's fair. He also loves an empty threat.
2
nekonight2 days ago
+712
What are you going to do? Invade them? You cant even invade your next door neighbour.
712
GERH-C-W-W2 days ago
+282
Second strongest army in Ukraine btw
282
Azraelrs2 days ago
+119
3rd. The farmers beat their asses at the beginning.
119
GardeniaFrangipani2 days ago
+56
Yeah those videos of Ukrainian tractors towing away Russian tanks 🤣
56
CttCJim2 days ago
+18
I love the clip of some grandma screaming from her window at the first wave of Russians something like "don't you know where you are? This is (town name)! Every second woman is a witch! Your penises will shrivel and never be erect again!"
18
Fischerking921 day ago
+8
To a culture as chauvinist as the Russian, this is probably one of the most effective ways of warding their soldiers off without spilling blood.
8
bob_nugget_the_3rd1 day ago
+3
4th police officers are better equipped, only loosing g out to the farmers because they acquired tanks
3
7adzius2 days ago
+24
Second strongest navy in Ukraine too
24
Anyales2 days ago
+42
As the french would put it
Bonne chance mes amis
42
eriverside2 days ago
+39
French have first strike doctrine.
France: nice threat you have there, shame if someone did something about it...
39
rrRunkgullet2 days ago
+10
Le mot de Cambronne.
10
Ill_Wolverine_62652 days ago
+3
Merde. 😁🇨🇵😉
3
cGuille2 days ago
+3
Actually we would say "va te faire foutre" and I think that's beautiful
3
bestmaokaina2 days ago
+2
Macron gonna be like “feel the full power of my baguette”
2
MJWhitfield862 days ago
+8
Of course not, they’re hosting nukes. There’s absolutely no way Russia going to invade a county that has nuclear backing.
8
Ok_Campaign_47752 days ago
+112
You know what? We are going to host them even more
F*** off vatniks
112
EcstaticHelp7712 days ago
+15
🇫🇷 Thank you Vladimir
15
69bearslayer692 days ago
+6
didnt they start this with belarus anyway
6
BigBananaBerries1 day ago
+3
Woah woah. Their actions are not to be referenced when they're pointing out what they don't like.
3
TheGambit1 day ago
+2
We’re going to host them so hard !
2
Objective_Mousse72162 days ago
+121
What about the Ruzzian mobile nuke launchers they keep boasting about in Belarus?
121
Patriark2 days ago
+44
They got Kaliningrad loaded. If that’s ok then Europe has a free reign to do whatever.
44
Nolsoth2 days ago
+11
They do exist, both Russia and China have vehicle launched IRBMs and ICBMs.
At one point the Soviet Union also had train launched versions.
11
Zefixius2 days ago
+46
Nobody cares
46
LordAlfrey2 days ago
+12
No this means its a good idea
12
Wonderful-Pause10482 days ago
+151
Europeans don‘t care when Russia warns; Russia does what it wants, so does Europe
151
[deleted]2 days ago
+15
[deleted]
15
Majorapat2 days ago
+16
Toddlers eventually become self aware though.
16
RoyalSwedishCoin2 days ago
+74
The problem for putin is that his threats have started to sound hollow. Hollow like the halls of the Moskva on the bottom of the sea.
74
MachoSmurf2 days ago
+22
They're not hollow! They're full of water!
22
majestic72 days ago
+38
Love how they'd supposedly "become targets in a conflict", as if they wouldn't be targets in a conflict anyway
38
JCDU1 day ago
+7
What's that? Military things are targets in a military conflict? Well f*** me, Vlad, I'd have never thought of that.
7
Koala_eiO1 day ago
+2
"Don't prevent the invasion or we will invade you."
2
ExF-Altrue2 days ago
+29
Alternative title: Russia confirming that this is a good idea, in their own socially awkward way.
29
Singer-Informal2 days ago
+50
Thank you for your concern. Bye
50
Outside-Clue72202 days ago
+24
If Putin warns you, you’re doing a good job. If he threatens you with nuclear annihilation, you’re doing a great job.
24
soulsteela2 days ago
+16
I suspect what really worries Moscow here is the French have a nuclear strike first doctrine. So the old sabre rattling suddenly comes with a much higher chance of a real action.
16
CanadianSpectre2 days ago
+4
Yup. Has nothing to do with the geography of the bombs, I am sure France would have no issues getting the payload onto Russian territory if they needed to today. This is purely fear at someone pulling a trigger before they could.
4
soulsteela2 days ago
+2
Unfortunately they apparently have the Dr Strangelove MAD machine if they get annihilated, launching everything they have.
2
luisa65-L2 days ago
+13
Toss it on the ever-growing pile of Russia's 'absolute final red lines.' I'm pretty sure everyone lost count somewhere around late 2022.
13
Dizzy_Industry12872 days ago
+47
Key points:
– Russia warned that European countries hosting French nuclear-capable bombers could become targets in a conflict
– The move follows France’s proposal to expand its nuclear deterrence role across Europe
– Moscow says such deployments would increase tensions and weaken overall security in the region
47
wodthing2 days ago
+25
Counterpoint: Пошёл ты, Путин
25
snowgoon_2 days ago
+12
Русские, уходите домой!
12
Lee11382 days ago
+14
Anything that upsets Moscow is the right move.
14
Ferelwing1 day ago
+7
It's a day ending in "y" of course the Kremlin is saying something like this and they're doing it because they want to scare people from hosting nuclear missiles. Why? Their threats of nuclear annihilation only work if everyone else can't fire back. If MAD is back on the table because everyone else can absolutely fire too, then Russia no longer can risk deciding to invade their neighbors anymore, because now they have to risk possibly being nuked too. That leaves them with nothing more than "border skirmishes" left to them and that's not nearly as "fun" for "conquerors" as being able to invade whenever they want to against forces that don't also have nukes backing them up.
This isn't to say that I'm thrilled that nuclear build-up is back on the table, but unfortunately it does make it so that Russia has to think twice.
edited: words.
7
Raknaren2 days ago
+10
Good job France puts most of their nukes in subs
10
Lonely-Abalone-51042 days ago
+11
Just admit it Putin you fucked up
11
teh_m2 days ago
+8
Oh, a *Russian threat Thursday*.
8
pepperino1322 days ago
+7
Russia threatens to nuke my country every other week, their mad ramblings don't even register any more.
Slava Ukraini, Ruszkik haza
7
NatalieSoleil2 days ago
+8
Russia against it? Then it's good plan!
8
PoopsMcGroots2 days ago
+6
What do the Russians think they have that someone would want to invade them for?
As far as I can tell there is very little they have that can’t be found abundantly elsewhere in the world, except for a population that thinks that living in shit is best in the world. There’s a reason so many of Russia’s oligarchs and their families live anywhere else.
6
DragonfruitGrand56832 days ago
+2
It's like asking a crackhead the same question
2
Gilga12 days ago
+5
Means that it’s the right thing to do.
If Russia warned against eating my own shit i‘d gobble it up like it’s the finest dining in the world because whatever they say the opposite will be the undisputed best course of action.
5
Ill_Wolverine_62652 days ago
+6
Rien à carrer de Poutine et des russkovs. Tu l'as, celle là ?...🇨🇵😁🖕
6
PVG1002 days ago
+4
Et alors?!
4
OldLondon2 days ago
+4
I volunteer to host a French nuclear bomber for the summer. We’ll take it out to see the sights of London, picnics, get some British culture - warning it may come back drunk and a bit fighty
4
Intro-Nimbus2 days ago
+5
Europe warns russia to stop warning. It's gotten old.
5
Jamuro2 days ago
+5
oh look more russian threats ... how uncommon for them
5
GardeniaFrangipani2 days ago
+3
Dear Russia
We have never attacked anyone. We are not a threat to you. You on the other hand ….
Sincerely
European NATO countries
3
mmoonbelly2 days ago
+4
French [nuclear doctrine is first strike](https://frstrategie.org/sites/default/files/documents/publications/recherches-et-documents/2020/202004.pdf).
It’s on the basis that firing them after you’ve been hit is no deterrent.
4
unfortunatebag2 days ago
+3
As a rule, if Russia doesn't want you to do it you should probably do it even more.
3
Bunch_of_Shit1 day ago
+4
Russia complained about nato on their borders and so they invaded Ukraine, doubling the nato border with russia, and they did nothing,
4
Cpt_Soban1 day ago
+5
Or what? They gonna invade Ukraine some more?
5
DummyDumDragon1 day ago
+3
Kinda rich to be telling us not to host french planes, when they're hosting Ukrainian drones everyday 🤷♂️
3
Opskynet2 days ago
+3
Do opposite against warnings is key
3
F0rkbombz2 days ago
+3
I’m honestly just surprised it wasn’t Medvedev making the threat.
3
OG3652472 days ago
+3
Should’ve warned yourselves that invading Ukraine was a terrible idea.
3
Defiant-Peace-4932 days ago
+3
Looks like the primary French nuclear-capable aircraft is the Dassault Rafale. This is, in point of fact, a multirole fighter already in service in militaries including those of Greece, Croatia, and Qatar.
(The nuclear-armed cruise missiles, of course, not so much)
3
Fire99xyz2 days ago
+3
Or what?
3
CivilBedroom20212 days ago
+3
Where do they think French ICBM Submarine is parked? The nukes are lot closer than they can imagine. Even then, with Russian corruption I bet nukes could have been covertly planted near strategic Russian targets, silently waiting if ever needed.
3
iCowboy2 days ago
+3
Russia has no problem putting nuclear warheads in Belarus though.
3
Desperate_Piece_76001 day ago
+3
Another red line or smth
3
thetyphonlol1 day ago
+3
that means its a good idea
3
khurgan_1 day ago
+3
If Russia urges you to not to do something, you know you're doing the right thing
3
robreddity1 day ago
+3
World warns Russia to stfu and withdraw from Ukraine.
3
SteamLuki72 days ago
+8
I mean, dont give them a reason to do it, maybe stop promoting nuking all europe on live tv, arming terrorits and just threating everybody in general.
Anyway, russias industry is getting bombed to dust by ukraine and they just received or will receive shortly a 90bn payout from the eu.
Russia also recently admitted that the economy is failing which is amazing.
8
Ontheragnarock2 days ago
+2
[ Removed by Listnook ]
2
_Xee2 days ago
+2
Oh no! This will totally make Europe reconsider, remove all sanctions, kick Sweden and Finland from NATO, and give up EU territories up to Lisbon.
2
Fuck-WestJet2 days ago
+2
It's just a special military operation. Any attack by Russia should be considered a surprise offensive attack by a hostile nation. They aren't a f****** ally. Ignore their bluster and prepare for their aggression.
2
San-A2 days ago
+2
F*** you
2
MrLeville2 days ago
+2
Or ouate mozerfeuker? You're goin too invaide another countri?
2
EatsAlotOfBread2 days ago
+2
None of your business, Russian gentleman.
2
Niftydog11632 days ago
+2
Europe response was a rather rude gesture accompanied by a picture of putin behind bars and under that picture are the words: " Get rid of THIS first, and then we can talk business."
2
HumaDracobane2 days ago
+2
Ok, time to host french nuclear bombers, then.
2
leducdeguise2 days ago
+2
Ferme bien ta gueule Alexander
2
Portmanteau_that2 days ago
+2
OK great, this means they should do it
2
RedLemonSlice2 days ago
+2
Now I want two of them here
2
IllSalad36692 days ago
+2
Russia would have functional spudguns but the vodka effort is impairing their efficency
2
West_to_East2 days ago
+2
And what exactly is a failed state going to do about ti?
2
Common-Ad64702 days ago
+2
So many Ruzzian red lines driven through with a cheery, ‘screw you!’….😁
2
csueiras2 days ago
+2
Russia can go eat a bag of dicks
2
YellowTango2 days ago
+2
eat a d***
2
Crucco1 day ago
+2
Sure let me write it down here with my invisible pencil
2
freebyte331 day ago
+2
Ah.. oui. On a entendu. Sujet suivant, merci...
2
Markus_zockt1 day ago
+2
Ah, the Russian "nuclear bomb" card. Haven't heard of that in ages.
2
Left_Breadfruit_88591 day ago
+2
how many times has Russia threated nuclear strikes 10 78 times? like this is there go to threat at this point
2
Mewhomewhy1 day ago
+2
It has absolutely nothing to do with Russia. Countries are free to do what they want.
2
No-Manager66171 day ago
+2
Sounds awfully similar to Donald Trump's ramble. Almost like they're twins
2
fremja971 day ago
+2
Putin can f*** off he is a c***
2
Legitimate-Cow59821 day ago
+2
Please. His yes men threaten my country on a daily basis
2
Contrail221 day ago
+2
Or what?
2
attaboy0001 day ago
+2
F*** Russia
2
Fuzzylumpkins12341 day ago
+2
Russia says a lot of shit. Ukrain has proven that Russia is a puffed up paper tiger.
2
JiveChicken001 day ago
+2
Sometimes it feels like Russia and North Korea are working from the same playbook.
2
GGuts1 day ago
+2
Well if Russia wants us against it then we have to do it I guess. If you need a moral compass just do this: The opposite of what Putin and Trump want.
2
noatoms1 day ago
+2
Suck shit Russia.
2
AshtonBlack1 day ago
+2
Somehow, I don't quite believe this boy who cried "Nukes" one too many times.
2
MommersHeart1 day ago
+2
Ok Vlad, whatever.
2
rayjaymor851 day ago
+2
Antoher week. Another Russian nuclear threat.
I'm honestly more concerned about North Korea to be honest, they might actually DO it...
2
cosmonauts55121 day ago
+2
We ain't afraid. Europe would vaporize Russia.
2
Early_Comedian_68411 day ago
+2
Russia threaten Europe or the whole world every other day about Nuke. France proposes to defend each E.U country from a threat who could happen... Guess who is the agressor? Guess who are totally mad at an independant Nuke power protecting Europe? ... Exactly!!!
2
Impossible-Ground-982 days ago
+1
what are you going to do about it.... oh, nothing
1
Thagyr2 days ago
+1
Russian Red Line gets another.
1
Ok_Flan44042 days ago
+1
UP YOUR'S, RushASS.
1
Mr_Sinclair_17452 days ago
+1
European policy should consist entirely of "what Russia warns against"....
1
rkoote2 days ago
+1
Hahahaha, funny guys those russians.
1
totallyRebb2 days ago
+1
/votekick Russia
1
Left-Night-11252 days ago
+1
Isnt such a warning a regular tuesday inFinland?
1
messenger182 days ago
+1
Russia warning that they will become violent is like birds singing in the morning. Just background noise no one really cares about.
1
Majestic-Contract-422 days ago
+1
So all of them at the same time ASAP
1
Aware-Code72442 days ago
+1
Might I suggest this question to the Russian Federation and its representatives? Either global Nuclear, Biological & Chemical Weapons - NBCW proliferation or not. We have a formidable albeit flawed forums for discussion ready to discuss.
1
powaqqa2 days ago
+1
I think we should send them an email saying: "Thank you for your feedback."
1
Pomeetorek2 days ago
+1
Thank you for the warning LMAO
1
mats_o421 day ago
+1
Yet another tractor, no no threat i mean
1
fafatzy1 day ago
+1
Get f*** Russia
1
Fanhunter4ever1 day ago
+1
F*** Russia i hope one day they get what they deserve
1
RisingPhil1 day ago
+1
So it IS the right thing to do! Thanks Russia!
1
FxKaKaLis1 day ago
+1
so we should definitely do that
1
master_slapper1 day ago
+1
My c*** <- russian media sucking
1
ElectroStaticz1 day ago
+1
All the more reason
1
Mr_Gaslight1 day ago
+1
Oh! Oh! Oh! Is this a red line?
1
Coupe3681 day ago
+1
I'm convinced they have a handful of nukes they think might actually work, and then the rest are far too degraded to be functional.
At this point the world is just waiting for Russia to fully implode, because everyone is tired of their shit.
1
Superb_Extension17511 day ago
+1
Just wait untill that find out what continent the state of France is located in...
1
doubleBoTftw1 day ago
+1
You're saying Russia is mad because France wants us under their "Nuclear Umbrella"?
F****** inject French plutonium directly into my veins, make them really mad.
1
MaxMouseOCX1 day ago
+1
I would like to offer my back garden to host French nuclear bomber planes.
It's not big enough, but that doesn't matter it's the thought that counts.
1
mdeeebeee-1011 day ago
+1
When they say "Russia", it's probably "Never president ever again" Medvedev shooting his mouth off after vodka number 8 again....
1
scalp_eg1 day ago
+1
As always an obedient russian just telling false things but no one is ever here to ask the logical breaking question. Little sad country very far from its former glory, millions miles away.
1
janescontradiction1 day ago
+1
Russia, advising everyone else as they're authoring their own demise, which will have very little to do with nations hosting nuclear bomber planes
1
fleshtomeatyou1 day ago
+1
All of Europe in response: lick my sweaty salty balls, Putin! We hostin' he hatin'. 😎
1
Technogamism1 day ago
+1
Excellent lets do it! If it makes the Russians angry lets hurry up
1
Djangorouge1 day ago
+1
As we say "Ils peuvent aller manger leurs grands morts"
177 Comments