ListNook

issy_haatin Apr 1, 2026 +1

1$ is he's going to say the war is over, he won, but won't be trading through the straight anymore.

1

wyvernx02 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Either that or he's going to announce a ground invasion.

1

MaverickTopGun Apr 1, 2026 +1

Nah he wouldn't do that mid week. I could see him declaring victory and then still doing the land invasion on Friday afternoon.

1

Enoch-Of-Nod Apr 1, 2026 +1

Markets are closed Friday. No need to wait for the weekend.

1

BilboBiden Apr 1, 2026 +1

Market's closed on Friday so he's got a free day.

1

Powerful_Toe_8155 Apr 1, 2026 +1

3 day special operation before the market opens again.

1

Main-Bandicoot6477 Apr 1, 2026 +1

That's not his style though. He doesn't want video of him announcing it so if it goes bad he can distance himself from it and throw Pete or Marco or others under the bus. If anything, it will be a 3:00am Truth post after it's already begun. Plus, he has to do it on Friday after markets close.

1

Elendel19 Apr 1, 2026 +1

“We’ve won but we have to go in and get the oil.”

1

Purify5 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Nah. He won't say much of anything and instead spend his time whining on National TV.

1

Playful_Set9711 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Whining about the SCOTUS oral arguments today probably.

1

CheesecakeSea6471 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Watch what the whales are doing on the market today. That'll tell you what he's going to say tonight

1

Catcher3321 Apr 1, 2026 +1

$1 *

1

rabidstoat Apr 1, 2026 +1

I think so too, though just this morning he did post that there will be no ceasefire accepted and the US would continue bombing until the strait is open. But I think he'll brag about how he won. And quite possibly do a Good Friday ground invasion.

1

AnalBumCovers Apr 1, 2026 +1

If we're doing bets I want an over/under on the number of times he says "like nobody has ever seen before" or the adjacent versions. 20?

1

Pomnikinger Apr 1, 2026 +1

His cultist followers: Trump: “ I have decided to end the war in Iran. Followers: “ OMG that’s exactly what I wanted!” Trump: “ I have decided to continue the war indefinitely”. Followers: “ OMG. That’s exactly what I wanted!”

1

Static-Stair-58 Apr 1, 2026 +1

So we should stop listening to them or caring what they say. At least until they come back to the table in good faith. But you can’t have a healthy society when 1/4 of it doesn’t actually know what it wants besides racism and hate.

1

Michael_G_Bordin Apr 1, 2026 +1

F*** em, they're incapable of good faith because they aren't free-thinking. They are**n't** presenting their own beliefs of their own free will. They start at the conclusion of, "I'm right and I'm a gooder person than you," and then assert whatever position was injected into their empty fuckhead brains by their chosen overlord. Trump's voters aren't ever going to know what they're saying is correct or incorrect. They don't give a f***. All they care about is *feeling* like they're on the right path, by putting unflinching faith in an ailing conman and his squad of miserable goons. They've completely abdicated freedom of thought, and thus no other freedom can be exercised by them. Conservatives have always been one-foot-out-the-door with good faith, but the Tea Party jettisoned right out that door off the back of Newt Gingrich. They've long been the source of the dysfunction in our society, and our current ails are but a continuation of the deleterious and detrimental influence of right wing ideologies. F*** em all, I'm done entertaining them as serious people. Their act is no longer convincing. We know where they truly stand, having voted for Trump 3 f****** times. We knew who he was in 2016, nothing has improved on that front in 10 years. Anyone supporting him now is just tripled-down on being a f****** moron. edit: **n't**

1

Static-Stair-58 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Amen

1

Scrambled_Rambler Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump: " i have decided that your entire paycheck comes to me instead of you to save you from trans people" omg, that's what we wanted

1

WheresthePOW Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump's important update on Iran: The ballroom is ahead of schedule and under budget. The courts are low IQ. Some people are telling me it will be the greatest ballroom ever. Nobody knows more about ballrooms than me. It's going to be great.

1

rabidstoat Apr 1, 2026 +1

That f****** ballroom will be mentioned for sure. Even if he's reading a script.

1

Cancel_Culture_Club Apr 1, 2026 +1

[Courts just told him he had to stop his ballroom shit](https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/mar/31/judge-blocks-trump-white-house-ballroom-plan). Hes absolutely gonna bring it up and rant about being told no about something.

1

apathy420 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Toss in radical left, sleepy joe, the phrase “the best we have ever seen” and something about Cuba

1

snokegsxr Apr 1, 2026 +1

thought he was gonna leave nato, declare victory the 17892398th time and call for draft enrollment

1

buffaloyears Apr 1, 2026 +1

my money is on leaving NATO

1

severe_thunderstorm Apr 1, 2026 +1

Headline should read, “pedophile and felon in chief, Dementia Don, is gonna ramble and lie to the nation again about Iran.”

1

yoursandforever Apr 1, 2026 +1

About Iran and some random number of other things. No way he’s capable of staying on topic. No way he won’t take advantage of the spotlight to sell whatever else comes to mind in the moment.

1

Foomankru Apr 1, 2026 +1

I’m calling it now that it will be in question whether or not the address was AI.

1

gfh110 Apr 1, 2026 +1

It's going to be one of two things: 1.) A slightly more "formal" repetition of all of his talking points from the last few weeks, i.e., Iran is totally defeated, they want to make a deal, we want them to reopen the Strait even though we don't use it, we're going to bomb all their power plants on April 6th if they don't, we'll be out in 2-3 weeks. 2.) Escalation.

1

J-Mac_Slipperytoes Apr 1, 2026 +1

I feel like this is going to result in another form of market manipulation.

1

RosyPalm Apr 1, 2026 +1

"We break away from tonight's historic NASA mission to return to the moon after 50 years, for yet another bizarre tirade from Trump proving once again that there is no one competent in charge of anything in the USA right now."

1

ShakeyLegsMcGee Apr 1, 2026 +1

I am fully prepared for some rambling gobbledygook.

1

Kobiash1 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump: "I won. War over. Straight is everyone else's problem. Thank you for your atention to this matter." MAGA: "OMG! KING OF PEACE!"

1

NoMoOmentumMan Apr 1, 2026 +1

What market should we all be betting on?

1

Southern_Loquat_4450 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Maybe he'll quit lying and tell us he sanctioned an invasion. The old "oh by the way, the troops are on the ground "

1

RavensQueen502 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Some are already in the ground.

1

alexander1701 Apr 1, 2026 +1

>Trump said "we have complete regime change now" in Iran. He said his administration is carrying out negotiations now with Iranian leaders who are "more moderate" and "much more reasonable," citing the country's hardline Parliament Speaker Mohammad Bagher Ghalibaf. Ghalibaf is a former IRGC commander with close ties to the Iranian military who was responsible for brutal crackdowns on student protests.. Ghalibaf is said to be close to Mojtaba Khamenei, the new supreme leader of Iran The doublespeak somehow still amazes me.

1

Unique-Egg-461 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Before the war even started, the biggest fear about regime change was that we'd kill the ayatollah and the power vacuum would bring the IRGC fully into power guess where we are!?!?

1

Alive_kiwi_7001 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Yes, but he's clearly different to the dead Khamenei. Almost as different as Rodriguez is to Maduro. Mission accomplished.

1

apathy420 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Not to mention the USA kinda killed his father and a bunch of his family . But yeah, Hes more receptive to work with us smh

1

ranchoparksteve Apr 1, 2026 +1

The address will take place on the road outside the White House and feature a can, and Trump will attempt to kick the can.

1

82nddirtdart72 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump to lie his orange ass off to the nation with 'important update' on Iran.

1

Eddfan36 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Didn't that get deemed fake by the Iran people? That Trump was talking c*** again? And he doesn't care if he sends people to death. Good thing Trump supporters are gullible.

1

Prudent_Link6029 Apr 1, 2026 +1

“It’s Biden’s/NATO’s/Antifa’s fault but we won so we’re going home, we don’t need woke oil hey let’s talk about the big beautiful ballroom”

1

OkSir7411 Apr 1, 2026 +1

whatever he says, his supporters will agree.

1

recoveredcrush Apr 1, 2026 +1

Why would I want to listen to bragging and lying? Nah. Not to be trusted.

1

bobcatgoldthwait Apr 1, 2026 +1

More efforts at market manipulation incoming!

1

Verum_Orbis Apr 1, 2026 +1

All our allies leaders in the previous days addressed their nations saying they won't get involved in the Israel and USA's war in Iran because it is not in their national interest. Remember when the Trump regime said it's foreign policy would reflect putting it's interests first? Apparently that's bad when other countries do it. This evil, cruel regime of psychopaths and sociopaths and religious fanatics has done amounts of damage to our country and the world that will be felt for decades. Future generations around the world will look at Americans the same way the world looked at Germans after World War 2.

1

Krisparz Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump on TV: "....and so I proclaim 'Mishun Accompish' and.... what?... go to the bunker?... we're being attacked?"

1

RavensQueen502 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Let's hope this is TACO, because honestly that is the best case scenario left

1

Shaggy2772 Apr 1, 2026 +1

So, 9PM Meandering b**** session activated

1

Unique-Egg-461 Apr 1, 2026 +1

My guess, he'll say we are getting out in a couple weeks 1) the forces will stay as leverage for iran to play nice in negotiations. Since the "war" is over he hasn't gone over his 90 day war powers window (ignoring the fact that congress never gave an extension....or frankly anything approval). This gives him an opening to restart a "new" war and gives him another 90 days if needed 2) "formal" negotiations will start ;-) 2a) He'll say how they already have a good framework and the formal negotiations shouldn't take long at all. 3) He won't mention anything about the strait. If he does, he'll say that "oh the opening of the strait will be negotiated during the negotiations". 3a) He'll say that the framework contains something like the US and iran co-owning the strait (us taking larak island...the small one near qeshm island) and US and Iran will spit profits of the new tollbooth 4) if iran gets outta line, we'll go back in with boots this time! mind you none of this has any support of iran. this is to just chill the markets out a bit

1

yoursandforever Apr 1, 2026 +1

He’ll admit he pulled a decision out of his rear end based on politics not economic or military reality, apologize for the misstep, and announce everyone’s coming home. /s

1

Diced_and_Confused Apr 1, 2026 +1

I bombed. I ran,

1

Made_Human_Music Apr 1, 2026 +1

He’s going to whine about how mean and unfair everyone is to him then lie and rant incoherently

1

neodiodorus Apr 1, 2026 +1

Dear Lord... another histrionic self-contradicting disconnected from all reality bullshit coming that gets promptly denied by everyone mentioned or referred to.

1

IHumanlike Apr 1, 2026 +1

"...the U.S. has already achieved regime change in the country with the death of longtime Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei" I swear this keeps flip-flopping, was the primary objective a regime change or not??

1

MalevolentTapir Apr 1, 2026 +1

Will it be ground deployments, or maybe nice big "Mission Accomplished" banner?

1

Banana7273 Apr 1, 2026 +1

P**** says it's gonna squirt piss out of it's mouth

1

Caveman-Ug Apr 1, 2026 +1

If I had money I would bet it all that his update includes a deadline of “about two weeks”

1

Historical_Bend_2629 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Word salad incoming. Your voters aren’t listening. They are too busy practicing the mental gymnastics required to overcome their overwhelming cognitive dissonance.

1

Diligent-Wave-4150 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Does it mean people should go short now?

1

8bitmorals Apr 1, 2026 +1

Calls it is!

1

That_90s_Kid_ Apr 1, 2026 +1

Mr. IRAN the gas prices up has something to say?

1

CTPeachhead Apr 1, 2026 +1

I pray he isn't going to announce ground operations

1

getmevodka Apr 1, 2026 +1

Bing bing bong.... Bung.... Thank you for your attention to this matter.

1

getmevodka Apr 1, 2026 +1

Possibly will lie some more about them leaving the ME.

1

Jeazy_the_2nd Apr 1, 2026 +1

Pretty sure he will end up ranting about SCOTUS and completely forget what he was supposed to talk about

1

Background-Treat5137 Apr 1, 2026 +1

Oh good, he's waiting until Scrubs and Abbott are over. I shut the tv off at that time to read anyway.

1

Teddy_RGB Apr 1, 2026 +1

As soon as he gets his stock trades in

1

Most-Appointment-756 Apr 1, 2026 +1

He could announce withdrawal , leaving the strait to Iran. Annoucement could be withdrawing from NATO Or a ground invasion.

1

WarmWorldliness7504 Apr 1, 2026 +1

The guy who suffers from incontinence has something to say.

1

opinionsareus Apr 1, 2026 +1

Whatever comes out of this fascist's mouth will mostly be lies.

1

OrbeaSeven Apr 1, 2026 +1

Trump will brag how the US has already won in Iran and how the US doesn't need the Strait of Hormuz anyway. He will mis-mention a ballroom in Iran and his Mt. Rushmore likeness on a mountain in Iran because Iranians really love him. Trump will then say how bad NATO is and how the Supreme Court is going to take away US birthrights from Iranians (and Somaili). Then Trump will take aim at Cuba, forgetting Marco Rubio was born to non-citizen parents.

1

Trump to address nation with 'important update' on Iran

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