Let's truly test it. Let's put him on a cross and then throw him in a cave. If he's still alive after 3 days then I'm willing to accept the Jesus comparison
188
noforgayjesusApr 2, 2026
+39
Always look on the bright side of life. du du du du du du
39
djshadesukApr 2, 2026
+5
r/unexpectedpython
5
noforgayjesusApr 2, 2026
+4
Being a programmer I am thinking Python the programming language
4
djshadesukApr 2, 2026
+2
I dabble in Python too, and the name of that sub even short-circuits my brain whenever I type it. 😂
2
TheFutureIsAFriendApr 2, 2026
+17
Don't forget the flogging. He's probably into that though.
17
Qu4r4nt1n3rApr 2, 2026
+4
Roll up a magazine and hand it to a pornstar, he'll volunteer and pay.
4
Winnie_rulezApr 2, 2026
+14
You forgot the part about him needing to not be alive when he's thrown in the cave. If he comes back to life, then I'd accept the Jesus comparison. If he was thrown in the cave alive, he could easily live off of his fat reserves for weeks.
14
OaklandTony6Apr 2, 2026
+3
even if he did that, i still wouldnt accept the jesus comparison… and im not religious.
3
Claudius-is-my-catApr 2, 2026
+8
I liketh the way thou thinkest.
8
I_might_be_weaselApr 2, 2026
+4
He'd die if you just made him carry the cross.
4
ArchdukeToesApr 2, 2026
+2
Toss him in a desert for 40 days, surely?
2
Excellent_Set_232Apr 2, 2026
+2
Finally the name “Good Friday” will make sense
2
Colonel-MooseknuckleApr 2, 2026
+67
It's true. We all remember the story of Jesus grabbing Mary Magdalene by the p****.
67
AmaroWolfwoodApr 2, 2026
+29
When you're the messiah they let you do it.
29
Aggressive-Will-4500Apr 2, 2026
+8
Well, Jesus did love the little children. All the children of the world.
8
autisticgaymanApr 2, 2026
+8
So long as they weren’t red or yellow black that’s right. Jesus only liked ‘em white. Jesus loves the little children of the world.
8
Andovars_GhostApr 2, 2026
+1
Didn’t go where I thought you were going, but this is just as dark.
1
autisticgaymanApr 2, 2026
+2
Kindest of souls, darkest of humor. In all seriousness though, probably should’ve included an /s on the last post as I’m sure there are some that would actually state that seriously.
2
KrisparzApr 2, 2026
+63
I don't remember the part where he raped children and murdered infants.
63
titochipzApr 2, 2026
+8
My favourite part in the bible was when Jesus scammed his own charity.
8
KrisparzApr 2, 2026
+3
And the verse about grabbing the pagan by the lower parts.
3
LikeALiamOnATreeApr 2, 2026
+34
That was Jesus's dad
34
[deleted]Apr 2, 2026
-58
[deleted]
-58
Made_Human_MusicApr 2, 2026
+34
He has the entire regime working to block as much evidence as possible, they’ve ended investigations into the files that involve him, and worst of all he started a war to distract from the files
But sure, there’s no evidence
Jesus Christ, you MAGAts are so f****** dense
34
incide666Apr 2, 2026
+26
The account isn't even a month old and clearly just f****** with everyone.
Do not engage.
26
KafeenHedakeApr 2, 2026
+17
There's no evidence that 1800pengwings is also a pedophile, but it's pretty interesting that he's so defensive about other pedophiles getting busted.
Pedophiles of a feather...
17
nowhereman1917Apr 2, 2026
+2
There is evidence.
A woman came forward in 2019 and made a statement to the FBI that Trump tried to force her into sex while she was in her teens. Just because no one has corroborated the story (what a shock, there was nobody else there to verify it) does not mean it is not evidence.
2
[deleted]Apr 2, 2026
-32
[deleted]
-32
Grandpa_NoApr 2, 2026
+17
It is a fact that this is not a criminal court. The preponderance of evidence suggests that he definitely raped children.
17
[deleted]Apr 2, 2026
-2
[deleted]
-2
returnofthecursedApr 2, 2026
+8
It's not an extraordinary claim to say that Trump was likely involved in the same crimes as his friends and associates Epstein and Maxwell. His conduct towards them and towards the evidence of these crimes indicates a guilty mind.
8
Familiar_You_5054Apr 2, 2026
+11
\>Trump raped children and murdered infants
You said it!
11
[deleted]Apr 2, 2026
-1
[deleted]
-1
Familiar_You_5054Apr 2, 2026
+7
It's PROVEN, The man on TV said it! It's all computer!
7
Made_Human_MusicApr 2, 2026
+10
As a MAGAt there’s probably a lot you don’t know. Like how to be a decent person
10
nowhereman1917Apr 2, 2026
+9
yeah, when you have 8 months to alter and hide evidence, getting away with raping teenage girls can happen.
we do have proof, however, that he walked into the dressing room of 16 year old girls unannounced as they were undressed. He thought it was so cool that he bragged about it. And we have pictures of trump and his wife with the pedophile and his fellow rapist Maxwell having a good time. You know, the pedophile who said he and trump were best friends for 10 years. And pictures of trump with his teenage daughter sitting on his lap, both grinning from ear to ear. Now THAT is completely normal, right?
He gave a legal deposition in which he said powerful men have always been allowed go get away with sexually abusing women. He thinks he's entitled to do it.
He's innocent, but has been fighting tooth and nail, in violation of a clearly written law passed by Congress, to hide Epstein evidence. Riiight.
But you go on believing that he never had sex with underage girls. Because the DOJ that he controls with an iron fist hasn't released the "proof".
9
Colonel-MooseknuckleApr 2, 2026
+7
Next you're gonna tell us his name isn't all over the Epstein files.
7
KrisparzApr 2, 2026
+6
Both were in the Epstein files prior to the DOJ redacting the information.
6
notie547Apr 2, 2026
+5
I mean, he was a self described great friend of epstein for over 15 years and knew he liked young women. Virginia giuffre was trafficked from his club. He also is a well known sexual predator and deviant so I mean, lotta smoke there but believe what you want.
Why would he move ghislaine to a min security prison after his personal lawyer took her deposition if he had nothing to hide?
5
projecto15Apr 2, 2026
+3
He probably didn’t murder directly. But his policies: immigration enforcement, wars, gutting the USAID, more than compensated for that
3
usersurnameeApr 2, 2026
+23
Paula white is a straight up heretic. Everything she says is the opposite of Christianity. If there’s a hell, she’s absolutely going
23
mynamesyow19Apr 2, 2026
+18
Reminder that Paula White was caught having an affair with another pastor Benny Hinn back in 2011 which caused a huge scandal in the church. So no wonder she's Trump's "spiritual advisor".
birds of a feather...
https://www.theledger.com/story/news/2011/02/18/benny-hinn-sued-for-inappropriate-relationship-with-paula-white/26416486007/
https://premierchristian.news/us/news/article/benny-hinn-s-wife-files-for-divorce-again
https://www.apprising.org/2011/02/19/benny-hinn-sued-over-inappropriate-relationship-with-paula-white/
18
sparklycilantroApr 2, 2026
+2
Was this before of after she married the guy from the band Journey?
2
Independent-Cow-3795Apr 2, 2026
+10
This the same pedophile spiritual advisor or did trump hire a different one?
10
Hydra_FlatlineApr 2, 2026
+8
This is the “strike and strike and strike and strike” glossolalia lady.
Anna fatta patta matta fatta patta.
8
Ill-Difference1672Apr 2, 2026
+3
They’re all pedos. It’s just beyond mind numbing 🤦♀️
3
daygloweApr 2, 2026
+20
The amount of effort these people make to make the Pedo-in-Chief feel like a special boy.
Makes sense that America's larges and ongoing grift - evangelical "pastors" - would want to worship another grifter.
20
SquirllApr 2, 2026
+3
An overgrown make a wish kid.
3
projecto15Apr 2, 2026
+14
Sex offender, pedo protector, multiple felon, serial liar… Donald J Trump is apparently like Jesus. Wow!
Is this a new world record in sycophancy?
14
Ill-Difference1672Apr 2, 2026
+6
And don’t forget “war criminal.”
6
EntrepreneurTop5670Apr 2, 2026
+9
I’m part of the rest of the world and we’re all laughing our asses off that the mighty USA has been reduced to steaming turd status by religious wack-jobs and racists in full support of a pant-shitting criminal!
9
Popular-Age-3174Apr 2, 2026
+8
Paula White is the textbook definition of a False Profit.
8
OldManGrimmApr 2, 2026
+3
Best misspelling.
3
Popular-Age-3174Apr 2, 2026
+1
Yes, textbook isn’t it? 😂
1
atdaApr 2, 2026
+5
Literal death cult.
5
TheWaspinatorApr 2, 2026
+3
Honestly, if I wasn't an atheist already, watching these people embrace an evil circus clown as their leader probably would have done it.
3
citizsnipsApr 2, 2026
+4
This was the shit that made me an atheist. The Trump worship was the bowling ball too big to be swept under the rug with my other questions and doubts about Christianity.
4
TheWaspinatorApr 2, 2026
+3
Seriously. They claim the moral high ground and this is the guy they love? Really?
3
Aggressive-Will-4500Apr 2, 2026
+4
This is why it's hard to take Christians seriously.
These White Christian Nationalist evangelicals are lovingly anointing the Beast.
4
naitsirt89Apr 2, 2026
+5
Did Jesus Christ f****** r*** kids? Must have missed that
5
tedecristalApr 2, 2026
+3
It's like she on it for the money
3
BrandenWiApr 2, 2026
+3
How anyone who believes themselves to be a true follower of Christ can possibly support this blowhole is truly beyond my comprehension.
3
One-Sea-8055Apr 2, 2026
+3
America has no credibility left in the world as a result of craziness like this.
3
Only1NemesisApr 2, 2026
+3
I can't tell if Trump is asleep here or just thinking "Get the f*** off me so I can go back to bombing someone or playing golf".
3
AdHopeful3801Apr 2, 2026
+3
To be fair, if you wanted to find someone whose life was the exact opposite of the life of Jesus Christ as portrayed in the Bible, you'd probably come up with the Donald.
3
SadCrocodile762Apr 2, 2026
+3
Jesus: composite myth character used as an excuse for two millennia to terrorize and oppress people.
Trump: yeah pretty much the same.
I see no difference.
3
DartLeingodApr 2, 2026
+3
I would love for this to be true, if Trump was imaginary so many problems would be fixed.
3
Illustrious-Fun8324Apr 2, 2026
+3
Lmfao idk why people even try and deny it that it’s a cult at this point. It has been for a very long time, but I can’t fathom that there are still people who do not see it
3
VitalMonkeyApr 2, 2026
+3
These people know no shame
3
TheFutureIsAFriendApr 2, 2026
+2
Trump's spiritual advisor is a joke, just like him.
The only suffering 🥭 has known is being rejected from the cool kids table in the school cafeteria.
2
Made_Human_MusicApr 2, 2026
+2
If he wants to attempt to recreate what Jesus did on Good Friday then he has my full support
2
thistimelineisweirdApr 2, 2026
+2
Pretty sure shitting your pants has the same mortal trials of being crucified. Give him a break. He's lived 46 years longer than Jesus. It's hard ok.
2
usersurnameeApr 2, 2026
+2
She also wants you to give 10% of your money to Israel
2
DundeeToCanadaApr 2, 2026
+2
Have him walk across the Gulf of America. Or better yet, walk from Florida to Cuba. Problem solved.
2
projecto15Apr 2, 2026
+2
Or from Maro Lago to Iran via Hormuz
2
RazzleThatTazzleApr 2, 2026
+2
Hes self centered like jesus was, that part makes sense.
2
oldgreymuttApr 2, 2026
+2
Trump is more like Judas. Sold “peace” for 30 shekels of silver
2
SimmeryApr 2, 2026
+2
"Why are young people turning away from religion?" - conservatives
What a mystery.
2
kevendoApr 2, 2026
+2
Ah yes, those missing years when Jesus was raping girls and bankrupting casinos from his gilded high-rise.
2
skigoggleApr 2, 2026
+2
Trump has zero tolerance for crucifixions of any kind. He's really more of an Antichrist.
2
RainbowandHoneybeeApr 2, 2026
+2
It's really easy way to know that they don't take their religion seriously.
2
The_Reverend_DrApr 2, 2026
+2
I don't recall the heavens open up and hearing a voice saying "This is my beloved son, Donald Trump, hear ye him" It was more like "whoever offends one of these little ones, it would be better that a millstone were tied around his neck and he be cast into the sea".
2
pontiacfirebird92Apr 2, 2026
+2
I got a visceral reaction of disgust from that photo. How do Christians look at this shit and not collapse inward with cringe? Holy f*** MAGA is such a goddamn cult. Amen.
2
RamoncinApr 2, 2026
+2
He's more like the golden calf or the Antichrist. Except they said the Antichrist would be a good ruler.
2
FalstaffsGhostApr 2, 2026
+2
These people are a cult and use religion as propaganda
2
ComfortableBuyer2902Apr 2, 2026
+2
So he's an Arab Jew who speaks Aramaic; studied in Babylon under Hille the Elder.
Was preaching to those who were not part of the 12 tribes
Got it.
2
manacharApr 2, 2026
+2
My goodness that picture is a good chunk of America in a nutshell.
2
projecto15Apr 2, 2026
+2
Yep, quite scary... Wondering what happens after the cameras are out.. Like some eyes-wide-shut o*** with Donnie Jeez Trump
2
chesterforbesApr 2, 2026
+2
Jesus is historically well known for shitting in gold toilets and raping children
2
SolonohiopersonApr 2, 2026
+2
holy week took an obscene and weird turn this year.
2
Cimmerian_BarbarianApr 2, 2026
+4
Keep talking! Let all the world hear it!
4
simplepimple2025Apr 2, 2026
+2
If only Trump was a fairy tale character like bajeezuz
2
fermat9990Apr 2, 2026
+1
Is Trump Jewish too?
1
Any-Reputation3639Apr 2, 2026
+1
These people are f****** nuts!
1
One-Reflection-4826Apr 2, 2026
+1
the least christian president is compared to fuucking jesus. he fulfills most(/all?) of the 7 deadly sins and breaks most of the commandments, yet he's our lord and savior. a borat movie has a more serious script than this shit.
1
stitiousnotsuperApr 2, 2026
+1
F******”christians”
1
onlyhere4thezipline_Apr 3, 2026
+1
I mean, they’re both riding their dad’s coattails
1
M00nch1ld3Apr 3, 2026
+1
But MAGA will lap this sh\*t up.
1
CallabrantusApr 2, 2026
+1
America is toast.
1
rwf2017Apr 2, 2026
+1
Remember when Jesus started a war in the middle east to distract from the pedo files?
1
rgvtimApr 2, 2026
+1
She has her head so far up Trump's ass she smelling shit and thinking its daisys.
105 Comments