What are the pros of being single?

In addition to this, privacy, that you take for granted when alone. Sometimes your schedule is theoretically unchallenged, but you yourself change it a bit to adapt. E.g. your partner is busy hurrying somewhere, being loud, searching for stuff and likely needing help. You figure it is better to wait until they leave and home gets more peaceful in order to start that remote call, rather than explaining them to be less loud and with what you are going to be busy, when they are all nervous. And you don't have to discuss with anybody, why or even whether you missed lunch, due to being focused on smth else.

>I've hated the feeling of being at the mercy of someone else's timing So true. And if you're like me (easy-going and affable) and marry someone who is assertive and opinionated, you may get bulldozed into doing so many things you don't want to do that you wake up one day and realize that most of your life has been on someone else's schedule.

What I love about being single is if I want to get home after work and just crash due to exhaustion, I can, without having to explain to anyone that I need to sleep. I can then crash for however long I want. Want to sleep from 6pm to 2am and then wake up and play some video games? No problem, no having to explain anything to anyone so they don't feel like you're avoiding them.

> we never had problem choosing what to eat, when to eat and when to go to bed. You're in a relationship so by default, you're not really choosing for yourself, you're choosing together. This already misses the OP's point. > It's about finding compromise. Compromise by definition means there's already a constraint in place. Your partner has veto power over your choices, even if your partner doesn't use it. The freedom isn't the same. That's the entire post of his reply, by being single you don't need to compromise. There is no negotiation because there is no other party. Zero friction is still better than low friction. As someone who's engaged to a rather industrious woman, all his points are valid.

Yeah but how often do you have a meal without ever even mentioning it to your partner? Like you're both home, dinner time rolls around, and you just get up and make yourself a meal without ever offering any to them, or asking what they want, or even seeing if you'll eat together? Because in my relationship that would be hella weird to do. And that's the point of their comment. No partner = no consideration required. It's different.

A "good" and a "great" partner can be caring, thoughtful, etc. But what will take "good" to "great" is compatibility. When you're compatible with someone, there are fewer compromises because you both are on the same page with your likes/dislikes.

*cool synth noises*

You can be in a relationship and still be lonely

I know exactly what you mean (not because I'm where you are but the opposite---all my choices have been limited by who I'm with). I feel that you can be your authentic self as a single person, but I suppose it depends on the partner. A great partner would be so compatible with you that they would see what you're doing as great themselves, not just because they love you.

Ok so if you are both paying for each other then 100% of the people involved both take your time and your money. It works both ways if you open your mind a bit.

You haven't met my ex.

You're also splitting a number of things.

It is the case in unhealthy relationships. Sadly there are a lot of people that don’t know what it’s like to have a partner that actually contributes to the relationship.

I definitely felt like I had less responsibility after I got divorced. I'm one who will come up with strategies and systems to make chores easier. My wife would never get on board with them, and would do things that made my chores much harder than they needed to be. One example is laundry. I'd always try to keep each person's laundry separate. I'd bring one of the kids laundry baskets to the laundry room, laundry went into the washer, then the dryer, then back to the basket to be put away. But if my ex decided she needed to do laundry in the middle of it, she'd dump everything in a communal laundry basket and leave that for me to sort through later. Sorting through everyone's laundry was easily twice the work of putting one person's laundry away. I was also the meal planner / shopper / cook. Meal planning is harder when you have more preferences to take into account. Then on the rare occasion she'd actually cook, she'd bake something onto the bottom of a pan and leave it for me to clean. Now, part of the reason I have fewer responsibilities post-divorce is because I only have the kids half the time, which gives me more pure free time than when I had the kids all the time. But another big part of the equation isn't actually the level of responsibility, but the resentment around her not pulling her weight. I'd get very bitter, not just about the extra work she created for me, but the responsibilities we should have been splitting where she just wasn't pulling her weight. Being single I still have a lot of those responsibilities, but no bitterness around the fact that I'm pulling somebody else's weight.

emmmm...

Read the other posts dummy, I'm not going to repeat them for you.

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