What is something you learned too late in life?

That not everyone you lose is a loss

You don't get extra points for overworking yourself. Rest isn't laziness, it's part of staying effective

Being loyal to someone doesn't guarantee they will return it. Not everyone thinks like I do. You cannot save someone that is not willing to help themselves.

proper cooking skills

money management

That saying no is actually important if you don’t you just end up drained and doing things you don’t even want to do

That not everything needs a reaction, and not everyone deserves access to you. For a long time, it feels like you have to explain yourself, fix things, keep people happy, or chase closure. But eventually you realize peace comes from letting go, not holding on. Some people won’t understand you, some situations won’t resolve the way you want, and that’s okay. Protecting your energy and choosing where to invest your time is a skill most people learn the hard way.

That most people aren’t thinking about you, they’re thinking about themselves. Wildly freeing once it clicks

That I don’t need a romantic relationship to be happy. Took me many years and heartbreaks to realize that I’m happier without anyone disrupting my peace, and invading my life with their problems.

One should not trust anyone.

That people’s opinions don’t define your worth, wish I realized that way earlier

I beat myself up far too many times wondering why I made some of my poor decisions when I knew better. I now know that we are all our youngest selves, and our adult decisions are driven by our needs that were not met as a child. I now look at myself and others through much more compassionate lens. It takes a lot of inner work to recognize those wounds and do our best to heal, or at least manage, them.

Not to care about the opinions of the general public. To wear whatever makes me feel good and to speak my mind . To be the free spirit I was as a child and now, again ,at age 62

That no everyone, including close friends and even family wish the best for you. It’s weird and I refused to believe it for a long time, because I always want people close to me to succeed, be happy in their relationships etc. But it’s real thing.

That peace is way more valuable than being right

Not everyone wishes you well.

How to be my own woman, to think for myself, to gain a self-esteem

I had a great figure. Shame I was too self-conscious to wear nice clothes

That pretending like everything was okay hurt more than acknowledging and working through it.

Win in secret

That you don’t get time back once it’s gone.

To stop chasing perfection, and take more pride in simply trying. I could be much further along in life if I hadn't put so much pressure on myself.

I’m only 30 years old and I have to remind myself that my happiness comes from within and through my actions and how I perceive myself. Sometimes my life’s anxieties and stress gets to me but this is something I’m trying to remind myself everyday.

that u really are all alone if u think abt it

Its ok to be childish from time to time.

Evolution. Republican Evangelical parents.

Making a schedule and sticking to it. I swear life is just a rhythm game, hit the major beats in the day and it feels good.

Virginity is overrated.

My love for stage arts. Music, acting, performing... Some yeara ago i took a gap year from nursing and tried to write a novel. Never finished it ( lol ). But i rediscovered music, musical theater... And now im way happier. I am working as a nurse again and i love my job. And art... It makes me extremely happy.

I believe that a lot of this manosphere stuff we see, general resentment from men etc. is because men generally don't ask themselves "what do I want from life?". As in, you see a bunch of guys going on about getting the job, owning a house, getting the car, and not being able to find the woman. And they're not asking themselves if that's what they really want. Do they want to be in a partnership with another person? Or are they looking for someone to play some role of what they think women should be like for them to complete another prescribed step along the way to living a fulfilling life? And I think women have become a lot better at this. They can see a lot of possibilities for how they think their lives can be. I'm guilty of this myself. I didn't realize I was asexual until well into my 30's. I had mistaken other types of attraction (mainly platonic attraction) as sexual attraction because sexual attraction is what's supposed to happen right? I guess not too late. Just later than I should have realized it.

Save money. Your 40s seem so far away during your 20s. Spoiler: they really aren’t.

Not doing anything once a week and just lazing around works on your mental being

Proper nutrition and exercise is the key to happy life, not watching the scale and trying to shrink yourself

Failure is a part of success

That your job even though helpful with funding life is not your life. That being so stressed out over it won't do any good.

No one is judging you

Notre Dame thing. I’m still f****** things up.

That sometimes in life, you just learn things too late…

Loyalty to a company is a one_way street. your position is always replaceable

Dass es egal ist, was irgendwelche Menschen von dir halten. Wichtig ist nur, was die für dich wichtigen Menschen von dir halten.

Not expecting too much from people save you from disappointment

I never got my mom’s side of the story my dad controlled the narrative and I despised my mother because of what my dad led me to believe about her. It wasn’t until I was an adult she was long deceased and my dad had just passed that I realized she probably escaped my dad being a serial cheater/ abusive womanizer. I wish I would have asked her more questions and not treated her the way I did because of my dad.

You don't need that much stuff and it doesn't need to be new. You can go camping with a fraction of items most people pack or buy. You can live comfortably without getting every single one of the latest gadgets. You are much better off driving the old car into the ground over upgrading to something new early. You can get books and movies and games from the library. If you start a new hobby, you can get used items off Facebook marketplace for c**** to explore it until you know what you actually need. Also, the strippers don't fall in love with you... they're just good at their job.

That most people aren’t actually paying attention to you as much as you think.

That one does not simply walk into Mordor. Its Black Gates are guarded by more than just Orcs. There is evil there that does not sleep, and the Great Eye is ever watchful. Now that was a tough pill to swallow, let me tell you.

Always remember your worth, people will try to push your boundaries!

Privacy is power. You don’t have to share your stuff w anyone

Take care of your hearing while you are young. You will be grateful for having done so later in life.

This is deeper than I should be answering at this hour, but it's that you don't learn good risk-assessment until your brain fully develops in your late teens and early 20s. So as a kid you try all kinds of things without fear. But then the fear of failure kicks in as you age, and you start thinking "Oh, maybe that's a bad idea" about a lot of things. But more importantly, you very likely overcorrect. You need to be able to override that sense, and take risks. The most important decisions in your life will almost always involve risk, lots of it in many cases. And you have to learn to trust that even if you fail, you can find your feet again.

No one is coming to rescue you. You have to rescue yourself. No one is going to make you feel secure. You have to find security within yourself. No one will build your self esteem. You have to build it. Secure attachments can be ruptured so you have to find security within. Rely on yourself and accept love, attachment and security from others, but never ever depend on them to supply it.

How much I value my free time.

That I have ADHD (inattentive) and prossibly (typo but I'm leaving it there) autism.

That those jokes those kids would say to you to “make you laugh” and you laughed with them…. They were racist. They were straight up being racist to you. But you didn’t know because you had no idea why they kept making fried chicken and kool-aid jokes to you because you hadn’t learned about that yet because you learned and caught on to things A LOT slower than other kids. But yeah, they weren’t trying to be your friend. And that includes your crush. Your “friends” and your first crush were straight up racist towards you. And you didn’t even know it. 

You're on your own in this life, so better not depend on someone

People want comfort, not innovation.

Don't argue with idiots.

I would have enjoyed being a doctor

For me, health management and financial literacy. No one was correcting my bad habits when I was young, yes, my parents, though they found, said nothing, and taught me how to manage my money.

Don't open up multiple super accounts with every job you start when you're 16 and starting up in casual jobs. Having 9 super companies is a huge waste of money.

Giving zero fucks

Driving. Still a horrible driver but I don’t have a lot of experience with it.

* Not all "friends" want what's best for you * When it comes to jobs and the work environment, for most people their loyalty will extend as far as it benefits them. * If you keep on telling yourself you'll change tomorrow you're going to wake up in 10 years and realize you haven't moved at all * Not every friend needs to be a permanent friend. It's okay to drift apart, people change and so do you. Sometimes friends are just right for certain moments or periods in our lives, but once your circumstances change you might not be the right for for eachother anymore and that's okay * Stay away from drugs and P***, even weed (Talking from experience here. It's not addictive but it's extremely easy to form a dependency on it) * Never attribute to malice what can easily be explained by ignorance * It's not about what you know, it's about who you know * Sometimes you can try your best and give it your all and that can still not be good enough

Separate bedrooms for spouses isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's not always a sign of an unhealthy marriage. We co-sleep when we choose and grow independly when we need that instead.

If you went to school in America, you were taught the "6 pillars of character." Essentially, the character traits we should exhibit to others. No one ever taught us that it all starts by being that way with ourselves, first.

Take a lot of photos of the people you love, and your pet. They won't stay with you forever.

that life moves pretty fast

How fragile your health is.  I fell down a flight of stairs when I was in my early 20’s, herniated three disks in my back, and had to go from wheelchair to walker to cane over the course of about three years. Before that happened, I was training and actively planning a thru-hike of the Appalachian Trail! I was robbed of my carefree 20’s, and never really had the opportunity to feel that sense of immortality/invincibility most people that age feel.  That time period is also when I learned that severe physical stress can cause immuno-issues and other problems! I tried for years to improve physically, but every time I started to feel like an actual person again, something else crops up that sends me skidding back to square one!  Here I am, 14 years later (give or take,) and I have a fuckton of health issues. One of my conditions is so rare, that there is no medical specialist within 800 miles of my location that can treat it… so I’ve just been trying to mitigate symptoms for the last few years.  I’m sure I was dealing with some of my diagnoses before that fall— but having to deal with chronic pain on top of it all— just adds to the whole hopelessness of the situation. I’m fairly stable now, but it took years (and overcoming a 5 year addiction to opiates) to get here. 

You can’t please everyone, and that’s okay

Drugs are bad...mkay

Don't let yourself go because maintaining is sooooo much easier than trying to get back to where you were when you were younger.

Save money 😂

You have to learn to rest when you’re tired and not push through pain

Just keep doing it even if you make mistakes or its not perfect

To quote a movie I enjoyed: There are seven billion people in the world. So when one of them behaves badly toward you, he's actually doing you a great favor because he's saving you time. He's telling you that he's not worth your while. He's freeing you to say, "Thank you for the information. I will now move on to the 6,999,999,999 other people, some of whom may have some value."

Coping strategies can work TOO well and then you don’t end up actually solving the problem

Small habits > big bursts of motivation. The boring, repeatable stuff beats intensity every time. Not saying I necessarily learnt this super late, but it took me a while (just til a few months ago) to finally properly sustain my fitness journey, which I could never figure out for the life of me. Start small, go slow if you need to, but just go.

The world (society) has indeed gotten worse, grown more stupid and is beyond human repair. In essence, society is doomed.

Family can be your worst enemies.

That most people will take advantage of your kindness

Rejection is protection.

That nobody gives a shit about you — including your family

Anger management and living life with no regrets

Accepting thats its not always your fault, but not dealing with it can turn it into your problem.

Interés compuesto

Long term consequences are a real thing.

That sometimes the worst things that can happen will lead to a better outcome than if they didn’t. You may think you’ve been shot but in fact you dodged a bigger bullet.

That you need to save money from your 20/

Its not that deep

Setting boundaries with toxic family.

Not to waste my time overcompensating for men’s lack of emotional maturity.

that adulting doesnt come with a tutorial mode

No one care about you

School is so much better than working.

Money don't buy health

Personal hygiene