I mean, in real life american kids are not that disrespectful right? I know parents don't really beat their kids anymore, but I never needed the threat of physical violence to show reverence to my father or mother.
Sometimes it's addressed, sometimes it's not and seems to be normalized. I'm just wondering if this is a true to life situation or something tv writers seem to want to inject regardless.
When my kids were little they went through a period of calling me by my first name and it was so funny and made me think of bart/Homer every time lmao
0
PruneEmbarrassed5585Mar 27, 2026
+2
can't think of many either tbh. maybe modern family with the older kids sometimes? but even then it's not really consistent. most shows i watch the kids still say mom and dad like normal. might be one of those things that feels more common than it actually is when you notice it
2
ThracianWarrior103Mar 27, 2026
-1
There’s plenty of shows where the kids do this. Feels like every other show I watch this occurs lol. Currently watching Ozark and the daughter calls her mom by her first name “Wendy”
I haven’t noticed it being specific to white kids. It’s usually kids who are being disrespectful, justifiably or otherwise, but there’s some instances where it’s more of a quirk or something
-1
KonoPezMar 27, 2026
+25
What shows are you seeing this in? Usually it’s done to show the child is being disrespectful
25
ParadoxpaintMar 27, 2026
+9
Literally every time you see this it would be because the child is meant to be being disrespectful, either for character reasons or for humor, or meant to demonstrate the character is weird. You'll see it most often with a kid in a show addressing a step parent
It's not a normal thing lol
9
always_an_explinatioMar 27, 2026
+1
or if the parent has not been there and is newly back in the picture and it is being used as a device to show the distance (and build up for the big moment where they call him dad and all of us middle-aged me have allergies all of a sudden and need a tissue)
1
TheBlazingFire123Mar 27, 2026
+4
No, that’s not common, only for stepparents. Still, not all cultures are the same as yours ,and what would be considered disrespectful in your culture might not be in a different one.
4
AevnNoramMar 27, 2026
+9
What's the context?
9
SatisfactionActive86Mar 27, 2026
+8
i don’t really recall this happening, like ever, i think you’re imagining it as a much more popular thing than it is.
even if true, different cultures have different ideas and applications of “respect” and “reverence” so it sounds like you’re leaning awfully hard on your subjective beliefs and need to be a bit more open minded that people are different than you
8
ManInShowerNumber3Mar 27, 2026
+4
Maybe I’m just not watching the same shows as you but I don’t recall this being a big thing. At least to the point of it feeling normalized. Got examples? Only thing I can think of off hand is Bart saying Homer a few times in The Simpsons though I wouldn’t be able to place the context.
But no it’s not “normal” in America as far as I know. Maybe with a step parent or something but I can’t speak from experience on that.
4
IsitgumMar 27, 2026
+5
I've only met 2 people in my life that called their parents by their first names. Not a common thing.
5
ja5143kh5egl24br1srtMar 27, 2026
+4
I call my mom by her first name. It’s how I grew up and I’ve never in my life called her mom. I think she thought it would be cool or maybe she didn’t want to feel old by being called mom? Not sure but I definitely didn’t one day switch, it’s how it always was.
4
HaikoudenMar 27, 2026
+4
Can you cite some examples?
4
VoxlingsMar 27, 2026
+8
God*damn.*
How old is OP to be recycling moral panics from 1989 when Bart Simpson called his dad "Homer"?
The f*** are we even doing here?
8
_dgoldMar 27, 2026
+5
My kids call both of us by our first names, same as I called my parents by theirs.
Is this some sort of regional thing?
5
metametapraxisMar 27, 2026
+5
It is very unusual.
5
SloppykrabMar 27, 2026
The only I time I call my Mumby her first name is when she's in la la land.
0
atomic-fireballsMar 27, 2026
+1
Your mumby is Emma Stone?
1
RMRdesignMar 27, 2026
+2
I have a friend that calls her parents by their first names. And it's a bit odd at first. I guess it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your parents.
2
Protean_ProteinMar 27, 2026
+2
I always called/call my parents by their first names. We weren’t religious/traditional at all, and for some reason I must have picked it up as a very young child and just kept doing it. I don’t see the problem. Arbitrary cultural norms aren’t the same thing as reverence.
2
culturalappropriatorMar 27, 2026
+5
“reverence to my father and mother”
Ooof
You need therapy
5
WhiteLamaMar 27, 2026
+3
Why would it be disrespectful to use someone’s actual name?
I’ll agree it’s weird though.
3
Wicky_wild_wildMar 27, 2026
-2
Its respect for a hierarchy.
-2
WhiteLamaMar 27, 2026
+1
You can absolutely respect a hierarchy whilst using actual names.
1
Wicky_wild_wildMar 27, 2026
-2
Did you ever call a teacher their first name? It quickly turns into over-familiarity. Do you have children?
-2
Radiant-Reputation31Mar 28, 2026
+1
Yes I had m a number of teachers who I exclusively called by their first name.
1
keving87Mar 27, 2026
+1
Plenty of teachers and authority figures in lives of kids will say to call them Mr/Ms/Mrs first-name though. And often in families with multiple grandparents it'll be like Nana so-and-so or something along those lines. That's not being disrespectful just because you don't like it when other people prefer it.
1
ja5143kh5egl24br1srtMar 27, 2026
+3
It’s cultural. A lot of schools in Los Angeles have students call their teachers by their first name.
On the flip side, I’m an attorney and I absolutely cannot stand it when someone calls me Mr. Lastname. I insist they call me Firstname. Even in a professional setting, I insist they have to call me by my first name.
3
WhiteLamaMar 27, 2026
I AM a teacher and I luckily get called by my first name all the time.
God, I would hate to be called “Mr.X” or “Teacher”.
I’d just feel extremely old.
But I assume it’s some sort of crazy American thing, I’ve never used last names for someone here in Sweden, that’d just feel weird.
0
Wicky_wild_wildMar 27, 2026
-1
Mr and Ms like Dr or Mom or Dad is a title that is earned and to bypass that is to ignore that work and/or expectation. Does sound like a cultural thing that you don't there. Thats fine, but I would hate to hear my kids call me by my first name. I'm not some random person to them, I'm there to do provide all that that title entails. Maybe they have martial arts where you're from, and it would be like ignoring the sensei title and just calling them John or something.
-1
WhiteLamaMar 27, 2026
+3
No, we’re just polite to eachother and know that a title doesn’t make the person. You can be respectful without the need to be distant. But we’re a communal culture here compared to the individualist American culture.
But good lord, getting insulted if your kid calls you by your own name is nuts. It’s your name for a reason.
If my kid grows up calling me by my name, that’s fine. I know I’m their parent either way, them not using “dad” won’t change anything.
3
luckyd1998Mar 27, 2026
+1
I assume you've probably seen shows with a stepfamily dynamic. Sometimes the kids refer to their stepparent by name in those situations. Sometime they don't.
1
winelover08816Mar 27, 2026
+1
It’s every TV writer growing up watching The Simpsons and seeing Bart call his dad “Homer”
The TV list has few examples, and almost all of them are due to a step-parent or betrayal situation. This is not a common thing on television. Also I would not have survived calling my parents by their first names.
41 Comments