When did you realize you were actually in love ?

Everything what I did without her, I wished I could do with her. And when I have news or something like that, I immediately what to tell her.

When we were leaving for work one morning and I said "Bye, I love you" on complete autopilot. My body basically spat it out before I even knew in my head. As someone with massive anxiety the fact I was so comfortable around her it naturally came out like that showed it was something genuine.

left a shop and realised i hadn’t picked anything for myself

When I realized I could melt into his arms and feel absolutely safe. No anxiety, no worries, no struggles. And, more realistically honestly, when I was able to openly discuss and talk about my feelings and opinions and he was receptive. We both came from horrible backgrounds and the work we've both done to get here is astonishing. I don't know how long the two of us have left, but I couldn't imagine doing it with anyone else :)

I'm an avoidant person and don't communicate well. But I changed when I met him. I have started to learn how to communicate when I'm upset or when something is hurting me. I wanted to change just for him, for our growth. That's how I knew I was in love with this man.

When I suddenly have an imagination of having a family with him, despite always denying the idea of getting a family due to the trauma from my parents' divorce

He started to go to therapy after our 3rd date. He was chronically late person. And I couldn’t tolerate that. He was always not that way. He was going through a lot, his both parents died around same time.. but never gone to therapy or seek help. He was like a new person after few sessions. His sincerity was so pure and sincere that I fell for him terribly. 10years together now. He is still the sincerest, loving and kindest man.

When I was thinking about her when I wasn’t with her

When my brain said "shit, we're fucked."

This one is a little bit different and will probably get buried in the replies. But I realized when I couldn’t get her out of my head for 10 years, and it’s probably because she made me feel a certain way that no other person/thing has been able to. It’s a feeling of being able to do anything no matter the circumstances, it’s a strong feeling that is hard to put into words. It took me a long time in therapy and self discovery to really understand how and why I felt this way towards her and even then I still don’t fully grasp my feelings towards her. It’s been a long time coming but I think I’m probably gonna get back in contact with her. But then again I might be out of my mind

I actually started apologizing to her about things rather than just blowing stuff off like i normally would have

Honestly you just kind of know. You hate when you’re away from them. Everything they do you find cute or unique not irritating or weird. Everything you once might have considered a flaw, doesn’t apply to them because everything about them is perfect to you.

OP are you a real human? You're just repeating what people are saying right back to them.

I realized that I felt the same way about her after jerking off.

When I took my first bite of a sausage McMuffin

After a few dates, my first thoughts where her in the morning, would literally get whiplash to reply to messages, she made me feel seen, which is a big one.

I set him up on a date with a friend and I realized I still had a crush on him. We’ve been married for a year and a half now

He was smoking and i asked for his cigarette and my lipgloss got on it and i said sorry let me wipe it out and he said “ don’t” softly and smiled at me. We looked at each other and i just knew.

Feeling sad after arriving home from a date with her, wishing those moments could last forever.

Being with her felt like coming home. It was peaceful, even when we did exciting things. She makes me feel like the weight of the world isn’t on my shoulders.

When OP replies to my comment

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When I realized I was making excuses for her bad behavior

When I sobbed while missing her.

When i always looking at her

Probably way long before this, but when she asked if she could call me baby/babe I knew that sealed the deal for me...

We had been on a date, I had a particular song on, and when he leaned in to kiss me goodbye because he had to leave for work, it suddenly dawned on me why my heart sank. I loved this man and I was nearly crying that he was about to leave. I realised that I loved him, and that feeling... it hit me in the stomach.

When I realised my insecurity would get the best of me so I started reading books on secure attachment and taking therapy to be the best version of myself for our relationship.

Honestly, the first time I saw that girl! She keeps saying that she heard me say "damn" but I think she is a liar 14 years later

Because meeting him was like stepping into a home I've known for years. As cliché as that sounds. It wasn't heart-racing and butterflies, it was just peace and warmth and a safe space for me. And for the first time, I knew that the beauty of loving was not in being loved but in knowing that I am able to love this much, to share my dreams and failures without fear, to feel contented in knowing that my remaining years would be about growing with him. It was an aha! moment. I can die now with gratitude, knowing that in our next lives, in whatever shape or form, he will find me and I will recognize home.

Whenever I saw someone attractive, she immediately came to mind and I caught myself smiling.

When i couldn't stop smiling when he arrives or just when i see him made me realize its more than a crush

when i started choosing her over myself.

The first time? I knew it the second I saw her. I was struck utterly and completely dumb. No girl had ever made me feel that way in a moment. I was trying so hard not to be weird and stare the entire evening but she seemed to be doing the same and smiling. I was enchanted. The second time was a slow burn. My partner who we’ve been with for many years was my best friend first and realised I felt more but was frightened by it as I didn’t want to lose the friendship. It grew and grew and eventually it came to be that I simply couldn’t imagine being without her. Later, I lost my best friend to cancer and I really struggled for months. She took care of me. She didn’t make me feel shit about falling to pieces. She didn’t question. She coped her own way. But she supported me all the same, even when to my own mind others may have left or found me difficult. It wasn’t that I didn’t love her before that but after that, I was even more in love with this person who could care so much and so deeply for me that it changed my perspective and deepened my love such that I had never felt that way.

I thought I loved her but didn't know love from a teenage crush. Yet the more we spoke, the more we chatted online, I just found myself hanging on every word. Everything she said I liked. It got to a point where I'd go online (MSN messenger, early 00s) and the first person I looked for was no longer my 2 best mates, it was her. I just wanted to share everything with her, and have her share it with me. 23 years later and I still get butterflies when she gets home.

When I was ok with being alone but I wanted to spend every second with him and every time my phone went off, I was hoping it was him

When even something smallest happens to her and I feel scared like hell. I feel my gut wrenching.

My wife told me it was after our second child was born and she was watching me hold him. I was like…what?!?! She laughed and said she had loved me before obviously but for some reason something clicked in that moment that truly cemented it for her? She said something at that moment and seeing me with the newborn just made her 100% certain I was the one. I know it sounds weird to other people but it makes me smile when I think about it. And to answer for myself, I realized it when I started wanting to be better for her. She helped me finish my degree, get a decent job, grow as an individual, and just be a better person. She made me want to be better.

When I looked past his bullshit and quit justifying why and just accepted him.

When I felt the irresistible fire inside of me, thinking about her, wanting to talk and be with her all the time - and not even thinking about anything else. We’ve been together for 16 years, she’s my wife and the mother of my child.

I looked at him yesterday and my belly acted like I had caterpillars for breakfast. Oops, I did it again.

When I couldn’t speak to her anymore.

We were belly laughing at something really dumb, and we kept adding to the bit, and laughed even harder.

I don’t think I ever "realized" I more so just knew. Like something fit overnight. I just knew. He’s the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

would save my pocket money staying hungry so that i can treat him with his fav ice cream that i had dreamt of trying but never did cause it was expensive, but seeing him eat it made me happy af

When i first met him in 1st grade, I told him he was going to be my husband here we are 16 years later engaged and getting married in October

when I had a panic attack while being in a huge crowd, and it was gone the moment I saw him from a distance, I knew I was in love with him. (we aren't together anymore but I hope he is a better person now)

When I thought, I will spend my day to day with this person and it's the most peaceful feeling ever. I can just be myself everyday no matter what. He can be himself as well. It's so liberating. It's like how home should be.

I felt just as comfortable with him around as I did by myself (my favorite times) 🥰🥰🥰. This was, and continues to be, a sign that he made me feel safe

After we broke up 🤦🏾‍♂️

When I stopped thinking about myself and thought about another first,

Whenever I closed my eyes, all I could see was his eyes staring into mine and all I wanted to do was listen to him talk for days and my mind would just keep returning to little things about him - his scent, his touch, his kisses, his skin under my fingertips, how he talks, how he breathes.

She became the person whose opinion I couldn't wait to hear the most

We were friends at first at school school. At some point, I realized I wanted to be beside her 24/7. Do any activity I want to do with her. Hug and kiss her. Luckily we had the same feelings and will celebrate our 2nd anniversary this June.

I thought I was lesbian for years and became best friends with this guy when I came to college. We were inseparable and everyone knew us as so. First semester of my junior year, we started spending every night hanging out until 3am. One of these nights, we went to Taco Bell and were eating and chatting when he turned the overhead lights on. I paused because I’ve had this weird thing since I was little that I physically can’t eat in the dark and had never talked about it aloud before. Turns out, he had the exact same thing! I realized two things that night: 1. We had TOO much in common. It wasn’t just like we were compatible friends, I felt this indescribable feeling that the way our souls, hearts, and brains functioned the same way. 2. We had hung out for at least 5 hours every night that semester and somehow the feeling of needing to be together more and more and more was almost insatiable. I’ve always been an introvert who is very strict about having alone time. I got home that night and it hit me that being by myself was not nearly as relaxing or refreshing as being with him. We just signed our first lease together! He’s the best person I know and still very much my best friend ❤️

Balls deep 🤣😂 Jk can’t stop thinking about her

Most of these comments here feel like obsession lol

I loved people but never been in love that way yet

When losing them felt like losing a part of me

When she called it off. I had been casual f*** buddies with someone on and off for years but we had never had that talk. Suggested being a bit more serious as we really enjoyed each others company. When she broke it off I couldn’t understand why I was so upset until it hit me. I had crossed that line and fallen for her. We both had commitment issues at the time. Though it came out later she may have felt the same way.

When my past situationships started to feel like a waste of time compared to the dedication and joy he brings to my life.

Just completely intoxicated by everything about her and vice versa

I think I realised it upon reflection as we didn't say I love you for a few weeks after, but it was probably our 5th date, we went for a walk then went to a country bar for food and drinks with a live band on. Now this girl loves country, and just seeing her in her happy place, singing along with this beautiful smile on her face. i couldn't help but just watch her and smile, that was the moment. This is an opportune question because a year later we actually recreated that date last night and it was and even better night than the first one, makes me appreciate just how lucky I am to have found her.

Friday

After I lost her...

Every second I look at him and I am pulsating. 12 years and it better never change.

We were just friends at this point but talking about what we wanted in our future partners and he said he wanted someone he could laugh with the rest of his life. My mind immediately went, “I want to be that person.” That was the moment I knew. We’ve been married almost 8 years.

Started caring for her.

Around the fourth month of dating it just hit me one night. But what solidified it, and made me say it without thinking, was our sixth month “anniversary” date. We went out to dinner downtown and stayed at a cute little Airbnb. He surprised me with a present. Nothing fancy…but it was a movie we had seen together that I loved, a blanket of my favorite hockey team (hockey is kind of our thing together), and my favorite candy. It was just so sweet and personal and special. It was the perfect gift! That night really changed everything for us. And not a day has gone by that we haven’t told each other that we love each other (usually at least five times a day lolol). That was 8 years ago, and we’ve been married four and a half years 🥰

When saying her name feels sweater than homey, when sight of being able to take glimpse of her delights the heart, seeing her being in / out of character peaks your interest in her, when days without feels gloomy, and days where you get to see her feels life worth to live a bit more. When you wished for her more than you wished for yourself, than I guess ,yeah, you are head over heels in love with her. It’s just that being in your 40s falling in love with someone makes it much much more complicated.

The first time ever, I didn't understand it and was talking to a mutual friend about how I felt missing her after she went on a little vacation and had no way of contact. He told me it sounded like I was in love with her. 

She brought me to her mother's gravesite. She plants flowers there every year. It was solemn, but her demeanor was hopeful and she still had so much joy and care as we planted the flowers. It made me see the deep parts of her, and I fell in love with those depths.

i still wanted to hangout after sex

When the thought of living the rest of my life with him seemed very doable.

When you let her go

why is op replying like a stupid facebook mom?? this whole thing is a shitpost lmao

I am

I can’t stop thinking about her and also her natural scent

Too late.

Never

When your heartbeat starts to race whenever you think about that person even from a random thought or just by looking at something related to them.

Still never had that experience, and i'm already 32

I was still happy when I wasn't with her, but I was happier when I was. She made me feel safe and cared for.

On our second date I asked her what she thought love was, and emotion, or a choice. She thought about it for a good 30 seconds and said she'd never thought about it that way, but both. That was the moment.

Everything I did was for him and everything I want is for him to be happy, I thought about him daily and I wanted to protect him from every little thing. I just wanted to see him smile. With him, I put my needs second because I wanted to prioritize him in every possible way. Everything is okay if he is okay. I still love him.

Accidentally turn myself vegan because I’d always cook for her and eat the stuff too cus I’m broke

When I had a dream of us having a relationship, I realised that perhaps that was what I really wanted

When I realized all I wanted in the world was a baby version of her as well so that there is two.

Still waiting.

Idk hasn't happened yet

I didn't realize it till now.

At some point hopefully 🙏

Obviously, it varies in severity, but I miss him every time we are apart. That's when I knew that this was no simple crush, but I had real feelings for him. We're almost together for 8 years now and I still miss him when he's not there. Sharing our time together is the best feeling

When the thought of him dying scares me and not him cheating ..

people told me I m smiling much more often after I met her

3 years into "convenience relationship '

When I gave him my number, unprompted and unexpectedly, yet enthusiastically. I've never been this forward with a man in my life, but something about him makes me comfortable. I've never felt anxious, nervous or like I have to change anything about myself. It's weird, I'm not used to it.

We went on a walk through the woods (+smoke one) after talking 2-3 times in school. Found out we have very similar interests and tastes🙏🏻

I never been in love.

I wanted to tell her everything I had done that day, no matter how mundane or unimportant if it felt like something I wanted her to be a part of it. Her empathy for other people regardless of what I going on in her life at the current moment is unwavering and she will always put someone else first. She’s the kindest person I’ve ever met and I love her.

I had a dream where I was making her breakfast on Mother’s Day with our children. Woke up and remembered I’m still in high school. 2 years since that dream, 1 since she dropped me. Still think about her a lot.

I think I never been in love for real🫤🤔

When you started looking for them to show a funny meme you saw. Your first instinct is to share a happy thought with the person even if you forget they’re not with you at the moment. Catching yourself thinking of them without realizing it is a good one. Imitating small habits they do, tapping fingers a certain way, things like that.

After I'd been with her for about a month or two it felt like I had known her for years. I had never been closer to anybody else in my life and I've had some friends for over 20 years and I'm only 29. I feel like I couldn't stand being away from her for more than a day. We've been married 3.5 years

Unprompted reassurance

When I understood that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, and also experience both the good and bad days with him by my side.

when i liked her so much i forgot what it was like to hate myself. And now that she abandoned me, I realised I somehow hate myself even more

When I tried to stop thinking about her for 4 months and I couldn’t, even though we weren’t together previously.

Well, me and my fiancé (no current marriage date, need more money) have now been together 4 years. We are highschool sweethearts. One day he kissed me out of the blue. I got anxious, thinking I wasn't enough for him. We broke it off, but we never stopped talking. After a few months of us still basically being together, I ask to be with him again. He says yes, he moves in with me, and about 6 months ago now we've been engaged.

I realised I was actually in love when I started tearing up with even the thought of having to choose someone else over him and when I started to cry reading anything he writes for me. I'm a bit cold as a person so I let go of people when I see they want to leave but when I learnt to stay, listen and understand so that he feels home, I knew I love this man.

When I still went ahead and paid 1 year rent in London for a shared flat with him when I didn’t even go ahead with my Master’s plan in the end. Realised brain & logic is long gone only the heart was making such decisions :)

I met this girl randomly in an Instagram comment section and we just started talking. Somehow it turned into one of those situations where we just clicked. We shared a lot with each other, from random daily things to more personal stuff. At first, I didn’t find her attractive at all. She wasn’t my type when I first saw her on a video call. But as time went on and we kept talking, something changed. I started finding her really attractive, not just in how she looks but in who she is. I started wanting to share my life with her. Like telling her every small, stupid thing that happens in my day. And I wanted to hear hers too, even if it’s something silly like her complaining about tripping over a rock. Just being part of each other’s everyday life felt right. The thing is, I’ve never been in a relationship before. I’ve never felt this strongly about anyone I’ve met. She’s the first person who made me feel something like this. She made me believe that maybe I can love someone and maybe I can be loved too. That’s why I feel like this might be love.

I’ve felt homesick a lot of my life. It’s not like I moved around a lot or anything. But my family didn’t feel solid/reliable, with money struggles there were months we worried we’d be homeless when I was small, and I never had anywhere I just felt like I fit well or I felt secure or just truly loved. When I met him I stopped feeling homesick. And there are a million other moments I’ve fallen for him even more than before. But that homesick feeling disappeared just from the first time I heard his laugh (when we met I didn’t see him at first, just heard his laugh and knew I had to know him)

When I feel the tension in his eyes looking at me

Realizing that I always wanted to spend time with her, even when I had zero social battery. And I always wanted to tell her anything that happened in my day, and wanted to hear about hers. As for a moment though, maybe a month into us meeting we went and saw the boy and the heron and she fell asleep on my shoulder part way through. I had realized that during the movie I just kept looking at her and thinking “I don’t think I’ve ever cared about someone this much”. Which, now I think of as the first time I fell in love with her. There were many after that

When I realized that she was the only person I enjoyed being around. She was my best friend, she made me feel secure. Everything became better when I was with her. I’ve recently felt like I have lost that feeling with her, but I know that it is more me than it is her. And I’m working on myself because she is most definitely worth it.

When holding hands for so long for hours until our hands sweats, then the date ends and you start sniffing your hands missing her presence.

When he looked at me with a cheesy smile wearing a soft button up in the cold. Face pinched red and hair all mussed up by the wind. It was breathtaking. In a crowd he shines the brightest out of anyone. I could spot him anywhere. I love loud and quiet moments between us. All of his interests fascinate me. His laughter brings chills up my back and I have the need to always keep him smiling. I wrote down all of his favorite things. Sang and memorized all of his favorite songs. Always showed up when he needed someone and loved him through any flaws. Even when I am hurt by him all I can see is the same beautiful man I first met.

Realizing I kept choosing him over others. If I was out partying, I always would call him. No matter what I was doing I always wanted to constantly stay in touch. I thought it was just really really strong friendship 😅

When i cried flying back home on the airplane, and we werent even dating/married at the time.

It was the first time in my life that I felt I could be “soft” with someone. I’ve always had to have my armor on but with him I could finally take it off

I wake up in the morning and she's literally the first thing on my mind. I f****** love my wife man.

when he wasn't with me I felt like I was missing something important. And when I thought I could lose him one day I wept like a baby lol

The day I found out I would actually do anything to her

Whenever I went to a beautiful place whether it was a scenic spot, a beach, or a mall I’d look around and think, “She would’ve loved this.” The same thing happened whenever I came across something I knew she’d like. Even while ordering food, her preferences were always the first thing on my mind.

When I always include him in my plans for the future.

I’m not big on being touched. I once grabbed a friend’s arm and wrenched it behind their back because they suddenly grabbed my shoulder from behind without me knowing. I felt bad afterwards but it was still a sign. My wife and I had barely been dating a few weeks when I remember her being in the room with me while I was playing a game on my computer. She came over quietly, pushed my hair aside, and kissed my neck not to interfere with me playing. It took me a moment to process that not only was a comfortable enough with her in the room that I didn’t jump out of my skin at first touch, but that I enjoyed her cuddling into my neck. I’d had previous girlfriends but even with them I’d have to repress a flinch. And for a different answer to your question, feeling that first little kick. It was enough to know what was coming was really happening and I was soon going to have a kid to hold. My first it was an incredible moment holding her for the first time and feeling like this little piece of my heart felt as delicate as a butterfly. My second there were complications for my wife and I was left holding my son alone in a room minutes after he was born. It was an odd moment feeling all the love I had for my wife but knowing both of us were glad that he had no issues and it wasn’t him wheeling down the hall.

she’s always on my mind, known her my whole adult life and it’s always been her. nobody feels else the same, she’s always just felt better: right

The day after getting married and she kept popping into my head

When my watch dropped from 80 stress to 20. It happens to this day too.

Years after the break up. We are still close, co parent amazingly. I can look at her knowing every flaw and she can be in the most baggy clothes and still she’s beautiful, when I have something I need to talk about, both good and bad. I want to talk to her. When I’m sick I want to lay next to her and cuddle. When she’s sick I want to take care of her. This happened 7/8 years after we split up. We started living together, slept in separate rooms. One day while she was doing her night routine I just watched her and realized how much I actually loved her and wish things went differently.

When I thought about her as I woke up, before I went to bed, and wanted to be with her always. Made my day feel great whenever I was around her.

I didn’t think of it much when we were classmates. I was like “Oh it’ll pass, it’s just infatuation.” But after graduation, I was missing their presence in my life badly. I couldn’t admire them anymore during class, get those little interactions, talks, nothing. That year of being in the same class was my only hope, and I lost it.

When I felt genuine physical pain when we were apart. It only took 1 date. After that date all I could think about was that I needed to see her again. It was all-consuming and amazing. Still miss her when I have to leave the house. But being married to THAT person is what life is about.

I can’t imagine my life without her. Plus no matter how bad things get we figure it out

Grade 8 on graduation day when women I had crush on since Grade 5 kissed me and said let's go for dinner this weekend 😋

i had a spiritual experience with my current girlfriend. i looked into her eyes and i felt like i was on MDMA and they glowed and i felt such an overwhelming feeling of love and caring i started bawling my eyes out and i got this crazy rush. i was totally sober, weirdest experience of my life. but yeah i think that proved i was in love very much so. and this was not long after meeting her too.

After I lost her

A hug lingering for so long. It happened with my best friend during high school at a hangout. Though we were friends and she already had a boyfriend at the time, I could not tell you how long that hug lingered. From waiting for pickup (she was going to wait with me but her ride came shortly after she said that), to my car ride home, and when I got home to change into PJs. That feeling is still kinda integrated into my brain to this day.

When i started to care for him 

When Covid came and we couldn’t bubble. I was working in a job where I’d still be in, doing personal care etc and he had an immunocompromised family member he lived with. I remember being close to tears thinking ‘why am I so upset?’ 😅

When im deeply worried for a person wellbeing when i have yet to discover them wholly.

He felt like home

When my passed grandpa told me in a dream. He helped me realize what being in love means for me, which I've struggled with for most of my life.

When I realized I would lose her if I didn’t fully address my trauma, and that I wanted to do so for us.

When it was too late.