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Announcements Apr 1, 2026 at 1:37 PM

Why do we all pretend to be busy when someone walks past us?

Posted by el_prasad7

I could be doing absolutely nothing, just staring at my screen or existing peacefully. But the second someone walks past, I suddenly start typing like I’m handling something urgent. Random clicking, switching tabs, scrolling fast… for what? Who am I trying to impress? It’s even worse when there’s nothing open, so you just aggressively open and close apps like you’re in the middle of a crisis. And the moment they leave, I go right back to doing absolutely nothing like it never happened. Why do we all do this? Who are we performing for?
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Abstract__Reality Apr 1, 2026 +36
Social anxiety lol
36
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +4
Yeahh
4
MountainRoll29 Apr 1, 2026 +23
I don't think I've ever behaved like that.
23
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +9
Maybe you are confident enough to face people
9
MountainRoll29 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Maybe that's it.
3
CBWeather Apr 1, 2026 +7
Or you're like me and just don't give a shit. Anyone walks in my office they're lucky if I take my feet off the desk.
7
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +2
Oh god, when will I get that kind of confidence
2
MountainRoll29 Apr 1, 2026 +3
How about today?
3
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +2
How about you transfer your power to me😂
2
MountainRoll29 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Done! Now go look people in the eye.
3
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Thank you for giving me your powers mate 🙏🏻 From now on I'll look people dead in the eye
1
MountainRoll29 Apr 1, 2026
See how easy that was? The new you!
0
CBWeather Apr 1, 2026 +2
Become old and know that the company needs at least four people to do the job but only two actually show up.
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Is it?
1
Longjumping-Cow4488 Apr 1, 2026 +15
as a kid, did your parents comment on you or others when they weren’t working and relaxing? often times it stems from that. now your brain thinks “i must be/look productive to be of value; rest is lazy and bad!” its anxiety/social anxiety
15
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Nah mann, ig it's just cus of social anxiety
3
SendMeF1Memes Apr 1, 2026 +2
Yeah it's this for me, reflexively gotta look busy before someone asks why I'm not busy
2
thedragonrider5 Apr 1, 2026 +2
That sounds like my dad, he never takes a day off work even if he's sick, and when he's home from work he works some more, even on the weekends, he's almost always doing something
2
parcoeur9 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Ooh, this was my dad, too. I learned from observing and internalizing those habits.
1
ErinRedWolf Apr 1, 2026 +3
You can also learn from your parents what NOT to do. Was he happy like that? Are you? You don’t have to live like that.
3
false_tautology Apr 1, 2026 +2
My dad was up at 5am and home at 7pm every day. He's almost 80 and still working. He was always stressed out, never had time for anything for himself. Had no friends he didn't work with. I'm like NOPE!! Don't care what anybody thinks. I use my vacation every year in full, just leave work randomly. I make sure I keep in touch with my friends and hang out with my wife and kid, enjoy my life.
2
ErinRedWolf Apr 1, 2026 +1
Good for you. You’re living well. 😊
1
Longjumping-Cow4488 Apr 1, 2026 +1
some people like to stay busy! even when i’m camping i’m always moving 😂 everyone will be relaxing and playing cards after along day’s paddle and im sawing firewood like a lil’ beaver
1
thedragonrider5 Apr 1, 2026 +1
That sounds like my dad to
1
Greeneyednerd Apr 1, 2026 +1
This is me
1
NovelOk3369 Apr 1, 2026 +6
It’s like the second someone walks by, I transform into the CEO of absolutely nothing ........... LOL
6
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Fr, we get so much work
3
Neither-Employee6848 Apr 1, 2026 +4
Because doing nothing feels peaceful… until someone else sees it 😂 then suddenly you’re in ‘CEO mode’ for no reason.
4
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Fr
1
Neither-Employee6848 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Which company ceo replied me ?
1
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
CEO of 'Nothing'
1
Neither-Employee6848 Apr 1, 2026 +2
Lol
2
Acceptable_Tea3608 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Maybe we'd like to keep our job. BTW according to George we should all have a folder or a few papers in hand if we get up to walk around. Years ago I read George's 10 Steps to Working.
3
Katyoparty Apr 1, 2026 +5
Ive never done that. Not sure why you would.
5
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Ig social anxiety
1
Katyoparty Apr 1, 2026 +1
Oh okay I can understand that. I didn’t get the context at first.
1
Brilliant-Error8607 Apr 1, 2026 +3
Looking idle for a second is basically asking for a 40-minute meeting that should’ve been an email. My brain instantly toggles on an NPC idle animation the moment I hear footsteps. I once spent five minutes clicking through empty folders like I was defusing a bomb just because a manager walked past. Pro tip: carry a piece of paper and walk fast. You look like you\`re on a mission. Nobody questions that.
3
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Noted
1
NormanGlacier Apr 1, 2026 +3
Who is “we all”. I smile and chat to people every day.
3
bkbrigadier Apr 1, 2026 +1
cherish that gift. i have been trying to be a societal human for some time but i cannot seem to stop feeling like a feral infidel in any interactions with strangers. I have at least been forcing myself to try in the last few years rather than engaging in “we all” behaviour.
1
Pumpkin_Pie Apr 1, 2026 +3
I don't do that. Why do you say we all?
3
547217 Apr 1, 2026 +2
Most of the jobs I've had, you had to at least look busy at all times. Outside of work, if you stare people down they won't bother you. A little trick I learned from growing up in a poor neighborhood
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Ohhh
1
Desperate-Plate66 Apr 1, 2026 +2
Because we don't want them to talk to us.
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
For real
1
Tired-Fig32 Apr 1, 2026 +2
If it's only social anxiety as you say in your replies, you should see a therapist. They can help direct what and why you're feeling a certain way. Then they can build up confidence through exercises based on your situation.
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
I thought being like that was not that big deal
1
Tired-Fig32 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Well, it isn't a big deal if you're comfortable with it. I only mentioned therapy in case you'd like to change that and are looking for help. You do you.
1
w1nt3rolymp1cs Apr 1, 2026 +2
I do it sometimes but sometimes i really dont gaf lol they’re all on their phones when I walk past them so why should I care
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Nobody gives a shit
1
SwordfishEmotional81 Apr 1, 2026 +2
Because if people see us not busy, chances are they'll ask us to do more work than we want. Or if they see that there isn't any work, it might justify them downsizing.
2
FionaGoodeEnough Apr 1, 2026 +2
Because coworkers are not trustworthy.
2
Blue-ilonian Apr 1, 2026 +2
Only at work:)
2
FitRock2196 Apr 1, 2026 +2
I find this to be more true the younger someone is. The younger generations have a harder time relating to people face to face. So when they come across these situations they use their phone / laptop / device as their pacifier / soother / exit strategy. What I mean is due to younger and younger kids now having devices they are no longer relating to people / each other as much. They are more comfortable with their phone than speaking face to face with anyone.
2
Affectionate-Tank-39 Apr 1, 2026 +2
I don't do this but have seen alot of younger people do it. I just say hello anyway and if they are willing will talk to them.
2
Rare-Secret-4614 Apr 1, 2026 +2
We all?
2
stonerg666 Apr 1, 2026 +2
You're either not tired enough or not confident enough in anything to not care or you aren't good at being in your own head. Also people who confuse trying to be impressive with trying to mind your own business so it's not awkward are annoying. Because those same people will think you're dumb asf for just sitting there like there's no in between for them.
2
PretzelsThirst Apr 1, 2026 +3
Can’t say I do that
3
WhatsThePlanPhil95 Apr 1, 2026 +1
It's a defence mechanism. I was bullied a lot in school so my first instinct when a straight guy walks towards me is that he wants to bring harm to me
1
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Makes sense
1
Signal_Fox8743 Apr 1, 2026 +2
You need to do the George Constanza and look angry when people walk by. That’s what makes people think that you’re really busy.
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
😁🙆🏻‍♂️
1
wilderaura Apr 1, 2026 +2
Ive never done this. Is it a common thing?
2
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Not really
1
ErinRedWolf Apr 1, 2026 +2
Then why did you say, “Why do we all do this?” We don’t all do this.
2
pingwing Apr 1, 2026 +2
We all don't do this. Try looking up and interacting with people.
2
ProfessionFew5788 Apr 1, 2026 +1
We are afraid to get rejected. I have initiated so many conversations with strangers. Most people end up ignoring my initiative. It mildly hurts. 
1
Mountain_Poem1878 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Have you met people? It's a gauntlet out there of the unhinged.
1
Powersoutdotcom Apr 1, 2026 +1
Trauma response. Teachers, bosses, parents, etc., all have an opportunity to be responsible for it, and even if most of them don't cause it, one will. Getting yelled at for goofing off, being silly, or any kind of living genuinely is punished by a LOT of people in whatever generation(s) came before. Probably.
1
parcoeur9 Apr 1, 2026 +1
The few times I tried to be casual, I got called out for not working, even when I had been working. 😅 Also, clicking and moving my mouse makes my brain happy.
1
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Haha
1
No-Ant3277 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Human and animals tend to avoid direct and prolonged eye contact, it tend to create a sign of provacation
1
JubalKhan Apr 1, 2026 +1
Because you're uncomfortable being yourself, even if only subconsciously.
1
Kenjoo23 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Got this when I'm on a run and out of breath, when I see someone could potentially notice it I always push through to act tough haha
1
Rad_Mint17 Apr 1, 2026 +1
Mere awkwardness? Reminds me of busily reading during a test when the teacher is passing but your mind is just blank.
1
SakuDoka Apr 1, 2026 +1
I get this too!  I thought it was just a dumb me thing.  I feel like I look stupid, even suspicious without having a good reason for being where I am when someone is near. 
1
titanslicer Apr 1, 2026 +1
I do almost the same. Sometimes I even look somewhere else. Idk how to walk while people are in front facing me about to cross me. Should I look them once and smile, should I greet them with a nod.
1
Witty-Blood-4648 Apr 1, 2026 +1
I do that for a couple reasons. I don t want to talk to the person walking past. ie I'm an introvert or u just want to look busy for your job s sake
1
theunsaidfiles Apr 1, 2026 +1
Because I hate small talk. Much more of a deeper conversations gal so I just tend to avoid it honestly.
1
Lazy-Objective-1630 Apr 1, 2026 +1
We used to have a manager at an old workplace. Every single time he walked past our station i'd pick up a sweeping brush and just brush the same square metre of floor. As soon as he's gone round the corner I'd just put the brush back down and lean on the bench again. I did it for weeks. One day he's passing and he gets this big beaming smile on his face and says "we could do with a full factory of people like you!" And carries on his way. We know it works.
1
TangeloVast3129 Apr 1, 2026 +1
I didn’t expect this but I really like your perspective
1
Stunning_Shirt8530 Apr 1, 2026 +1
every time. someone walks past my desk at work and suddenly i'm very focused on whatever spreadsheet is open like my life depends on it
1
existential-inquiry Apr 1, 2026 +1
I've seen this get worse during and after Covid. No one wants to get close, interact with real humans or make eye contact anymore. It's sad in my opinion.
1
transparentmi Apr 1, 2026 +1
I think it’s because we feel pressure to perform or put on a mask when we casually stride by. Everyone wants to appear put together or successful, busy, etc. Maybe instinctually it’s a way to not show weakness. Or a way to avoid confrontation. I struggle with this too, but I’ve been trying to be more brave lately. Holding eye contact for just one second more, relaxing my face or giving a slight smile. I do think I see my self esteem improving this way.
1
bkbrigadier Apr 1, 2026 +1
re: out in public mainly— i think it’s because we were evolved to be in small-ish social clans (all familiar faces) and it’s quite unnatural in the scheme of things for us to be constantly bombarded with the stimulus of humans strange to us. Our nervous system is the one creating the underlying response, and how it manifests is weird stuff like never leaving the house, averting our eyes if there’s a chance they would meet, or quickly leaving a space when we sense someone about to enter it.
1
Suggestion-- Apr 1, 2026 +1
Just here to earn karma, hope that’s okay c:
1
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 +2
No problem, nobody cares actually 🤣
2
Suggestion-- Apr 1, 2026 +1
Well I think it would be better to say that than just send a random punctuation mark xD
1
Linux-Neophyte Apr 1, 2026 -1
You do? That's messed up and rude lol. I mean, unless you're going through something and need that moment of space.
-1
nofear78 Apr 1, 2026
ADHD
0
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026
ADHD
0
Hachiko75 Apr 1, 2026 -3
I think the real question is why do passing people feel the need to interrupt you looking at your phone by loudly saying good morning or anything at all? Do they need to be acknowledged that badly?
-3
el_prasad7 Apr 1, 2026 -2
Ig they seek for validation
-2
Hachiko75 Apr 1, 2026 -2
It's annoying. I'll say the greeting back and then mumble "don't f****** talk to me." Sometimes I won't respond at all. It just reminds me too much of when I worked in retail.
-2
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